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[i习作temp] issue51 【ForOneReason小组8】7.20 [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-7-20 23:07:25 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
本帖最后由 T_K 于 2010-7-20 23:17 编辑

Issue 51


"Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."






The speaker would prone for the education being specifically focus on every student’s own interests and needs, not a universal and imprecise one. I agree insofar that education based on individual level is helpful to some degree in tapping each student’s potential and nature of creativity and individualism. At the same time, merely satisfying the needs and interests of individuals is neither guaranteeing the education effectiveness with necessity nor easily carry into practice.



Before discussing the justifiability of this statement, it is essential for us to re-examine what is the final purpose of education and how to judge the relatively effectiveness of education. From my perspective, the aim of education consists of two parts: keeping with the nature of the human personality and cultivating creative intelligence required for adaption to changes in the social development.



Just an old saying goes, ‘not two leaves are the same complete in this world’, every student’s interests and hobbies are never all the same. For the purpose of keeping with the nature of the human personality, it is crucial for educators provide various curriculums and courses for different students with diverse talent and interests. As is known to all, interest is the foundation upon which one relies to learn the knowledge and skills about a certain field most effectively. Granted some students may have a good score in the subjects that they do not like; for the majority, the subject in accordance with their interests are more likely to galvanize their inner passion and motivation to learn as harder as they can. Their learning initiative and subject willingness is much more intense, so their proficiency of absorbing that type of knowledge enhanced.



However, establishing an individual-centered system would at the same time pose certain problems, which might weaken the benefits, noted above.



Firstly, the feasibility of taking every student’s needs and interests into consideration is open to doubt. People may take it for granted that the more specifically the education designed in related to students’ interests and needs, the more effective it may turn out to be. Reasonable as it may seem, such an education system does not make full use of the current educational resources. Compared with the large sum of students, the scarcity of education resources limits the implement of such conception, since by doing so, it might bring chaos to the whole structure of education for its inconvenience to manipulate and distribute available educational resources with the utmost fairness and efficiency.



Even assuming that this method can be carried out and run smoothly, no schools and students can take the risk of ignoring the vital importance of basic knowledge and skills that a cultivated person should possess, such as math, literature, and logical thinking. Especially in today’s modernized and globalized society, no longer can a person who is steeped in one realm without knowing about anything in other fields is capable of surviving and adapting to variations along with the social development. For instance, a student specialized in biochemistry should not abandon the study of liberal arts such as history and music; otherwise, he may have trouble of mastering a strong communication skills, or even worse, fails to formulate a correct view of life and a healthy outlook on society.



To sum up, individual-centered education would amount to a double-edged sword. However, although complete liberty in designing education is not available to all students, schools can try to offer more choices and autonomy to students under the precondition that the basic general knowledge which is also important for individuals as part of a society have been well acknowledged.




几个月前写的第一篇。。有点干瘪。。

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发表于 2010-7-21 00:43:41 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 梦的溪夜 于 2010-7-21 00:45 编辑

The speaker would prone for the education being specifically focus on every student’s own interests and needs, not a universal and imprecise one. I agree insofar that education based on individual level is helpful to some degree in tapping each student’s potential and nature of creativity and individualism. At the same time, merely satisfying the needs and interests of individuals is neither guaranteeing the education effectiveness with necessity nor easily carry into practice.



Before discussing the justifiability of this statement, it is essential for us to re-examine what is the final purpose of education and how to judge the relatively effectiveness of education. From my perspective, the aim of education consists of two parts: keeping with the nature of the human personality and cultivating creative intelligence required for adaption to changes in the social development.



Just an old saying goes, ‘not two leaves are the same complete in this world’, every student’s interests and hobbies are never all the same. For the purpose of keeping with the nature of the human personality, it is crucial for educators provide various curriculums and courses for different students with diverse talent and interests. As is known to all, interest is the foundation upon which one relies to learn the knowledge and skills about a certain field most effectively. Granted some students may have a good score in the subjects that they do not like这个很严密,不错; for the majority, the subject in accordance with their interests are more likely to galvanize their inner passion and motivation to learn as harder as they can. Their learning initiative and subject willingness is much more intense, so their proficiency of absorbing that type of knowledge enhanced. 论证稍显单薄,前面提到教育要顺应人的本性,顾及不同的能力和兴趣,后面却只提到兴趣可以提高相关领域的熟练程度。这一点可以更工整一些。



However, establishing an individual-centered system would at the same time pose certain problems, which might weaken the benefits, noted above.



Firstly, the feasibility of taking every student’s needs and interests into consideration is open to doubt. People may take it for granted这个有点突兀,感觉为了立论而立论,可以不必用这个句式 that the more specifically the education designed in related to students’ interests and needs, the more effective it may turn out to be. Reasonable as it may seem, such an education system does not make full use of the current educational resources. Compared with the large sum of students, the scarcity of education resources limits the implement of such conception, since by doing so, it might bring chaos to the whole structure of education for its inconvenience to manipulate and distribute available educational resources with the utmost fairness and efficiency.感觉最后一句有点繁杂,逻辑上跨度太大,内容虽然是第二句的展开,但是有点累赘,如果在二的基础上直接分层展开论述为何没有充分利用可能更有力度。


Even assuming that this method can be carried out and run smoothly, no schools and students can take the risk of ignoring the vital importance of basic knowledge and skills that a cultivated person should possess, such as math, literature, and logical thinking. Especially in today’s modernized and globalized society, no longer can a person who is steeped in one realm without knowing about anything in other fields is capable of surviving and adapting to variations along with the social development. For instance, a student specialized in biochemistry should not abandon the study of liberal arts such as history and music; otherwise, he may have trouble of(in) mastering a strong communication skills, or even worse, fails to formulate a correct view of life and a healthy outlook on society.这一段结构比较完整,论述不错。但是最后的例子感觉意犹未尽,没有说清楚掌握history和communication的关系。



To sum up, individual-centered education would amount to a double-edged sword. However, although complete liberty in designing education is not available to all students, schools can try to offer more choices and autonomy to students under the precondition that the basic general knowledge which is also important for individuals as part of a society(social member) have been well acknowledged.最后一句比较全面,还是不错的,不过总觉得结尾用这么长的一句,重点不够突出~~


作为一篇限时写完的习作,T_K同学的词汇功底相当不错,这点相当值得本人学习O(∩_∩)O,就是写得仓促犯了不少语法错误,都让人觉得有点支离破碎啊,我只在文中指出了一处,其他的地方你就自己改改啦,相信多练习之后可以更迅速准确~~
另外文章主要的一个问题就是长句重点被淹没,感觉一个句子是为了包含尽量多的信息而不是为了表达清楚一个意思。希望今后条理更清楚些哦~总的来说,文章的结构还是很完善的,如果细节上更精细一点,就是相当不错的习作了哦~



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RE: issue51 【ForOneReason小组8】7.20 [修改]

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