Issue No.130【六人行】AW作文小组 7.25作业 by ARTHUR

mn0331UID: 2739758

130："How children are socialized today determines the destiny of society. Unfortunately, we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring about a better society."
422 WORDS / 3.5HOURS

Been brought up in the process of continuous socialization is indisputable fact. At the same time the social role of the community to promote is obvious. However, the development of society is not by people in the socialization process of growing the decision to getting a suspect. For years, the education of children has been discussed countless times. However, the discussion is still not out of what exactly the child’s education is, and how to educate a child is wrong.

Children are socialized, that is, people are socialized, does affect the development of society. For example, our growing need for communication and information exchange needs, and promote the development of postal services. From the letters of exchange to the telephone exchange, telephone exchanges to the network from the exchange. In the process of socialization produce a variety of needs, these needs with technology innovation birth. In this way, scientific and technological progress of society, human being social needs are met.

So I want to say how children are socialized can affect social development. But this is only a necessary condition for determining social destiny, but not sufficient condition. Will affect many aspects of social destiny, such as politics, nature, science and technology ... ... children how to be social is just one, but not all.

Meanwhile, the second part is the children's education and social development. Children's education is indeed very important, but we cannot conclude that no one what kind of education is good, what kind of educational methods should be abolished. Hegel said, what is rational is actual and what is actual is rational. Therefore, the existing educational methods are reasonable, are acceptable.

Social development from the trend for many years, people of various educational methods are to promote social progress. No evidence that the child receives the exam-oriented education in China than the United States to accept the child's interests in the poor education. And no phenomenon that China's future development will suffer because their children's education lags behind the world. So, people just need to follow the existing educational methods, with the development of the times constantly revised, will be able to train the children to adapt to the times.

I believe in the continued efforts of all of us, our next generation will be better to be socialized in the community will move forward to better times.

Eileen312UID: 2648750

[谁被brought up呢？]Been brought up in the process of continuous socialization is [an] indisputable fact. At the same time the social role of the community to promote [the social role of the community to promote,想要表达什么意思呢，很绕口] is obvious. However, the development of society is not [加reallized] by people in the socialization process of growing the decision to getting a suspect[of growing the decision to getting a suspect,用来修饰什么？However这一整句话的意思有点模糊]. For years, the education of children has been discussed countless times. However, the discussion is still not out of what exactly the child’s education is , and how to educate a child is wrong. [开头段就用两个however,不太好吧，建议换个词，或者换种表达方法][这一整段的逻辑感不强哎]
Children are socialized, that is, [,去掉]people are socialized[Children are socialized= people are socialized？要么不说，要么解释一下两者的联系], does affect the development of society. For example, our growing need for communication and information exchange needs, and promote the development of postal services.[children’s growing up evolves communicating with friends far away, which makes writing letters or sending post cards necessary; thus promote the development of postal services.] From the letters of exchange[exchange of letters] to the telephone exchange, telephone exchanges to the network from [form?] the exchange.[不要怪我说得太直接啊，这句很罗嗦 ，from A to B, to C, and to D…] In the process of socialization produce a variety of needs[in是介词，produce用的原形，也就是没有主语], [这里怎么能用“，”，把前半句改改吧，另外连着两个need不如改为从句]these needs with technology innovation birth.[Children’s socialization process needs numerous other similar requests, which results in technology innovation.] In this way, scientific and technological progress of society, human being social needs are met.
So I want to say how children are socialized can affect [前面用过，换为influence]social development. But this is only a necessary condition for determining social destiny, but[发现了吗，同一句话两个BUT] not sufficient condition. Will [怎么凭空跑出来一个WILL？]affect many aspects of social destiny, such as politics, nature, science and technology ... ... children how to be social is just one, but not all.[How children become social is just one of them, but not all.][这一段好口语话啊]
Meanwhile, the second part is the children's education and social development. Children's education is indeed very important, but we cannot conclude that no one what kind of education is good[no one what kind of education is good??????], what kind of educational methods should be abolished. Hegel said, what is rational is actual and what is actual is rational[said—is,事态要一致，或者用引号吧]. Therefore, the existing educational methods are reasonable, are acceptable [reasonable and acceptable].
Social development from the trend for many years[from the trend不地道的说法], people of various educational methods are to promote social progress. No evidence that the child receives the exam-oriented education in China than the United States to accept the child's interests in the poor education[这句还是模糊]. And no phenomenon that[no phenomenon that,that做定语从句，这句没有主语] China's future development will suffer because their children's education lags behind the world. So, people just need to follow the existing educational methods, with the development of the times constantly revised, will be able to train the children to adapt to the times.
I believe in the continued[continous] efforts of all of us, our next generation will be better to be socialized in the community[and] will move forward to better times.
[全文来看，语法错误太多，句子结构错误百出。建议加强语法方面的联系，多背句子结构。另外，无论从一段还是从全文看，逻辑感都不够强。或许因为刚开始写吧。。。呵呵，实话实说了。。。加油啊，还有时间改进的。。。O(∩_∩)O哈！]

mn0331UID: 2739758

2# Eileen312

第一次写，的确漏洞百出。自己都觉得脸红。
补上了昨天的提纲。
159"The human mind will always be superior to machines because machines are only tools of human minds."
1.人的智慧与机器相比的确更胜一筹，从制造与被制造的关系就可以看出
2.但同时机器按照人类设置的程式运作，在某些时候会表现的比人类更胜一筹
3.在目前的情形下机器只是人类的工具，可不排除在不久的将来，随着人类技术的进步，真正的实现了机器的智能化，这样机器就不仅仅是人类的工具了。

218"In order for any work of art—whether film, literature, sculpture, or a song—to have merit, it must be understandable to most people."
1艺术作品的确得有人理解与欣赏
2但真正有价值的作品在某些时候的确不被大多数人接受，因为它包含了高端的文化底蕴和文化内涵
3甚至有些艺术作品超越了它所处时代人们的理解水平，这样的作品只有在历史的长河中才能被后人发现并推崇为经典

190"As long as people in a society are hungry or out of work or lack the basic skills needed to survive, the use of public resources to support the arts is inappropriate—and, perhaps, even cruel—when one considers all the potential uses of such money."
1艺术应该被支持，因为它是人类的文化财富
2但在生活都难以维持的时候，艺术就变成了一种奢侈品。生存是最基本的权利。
3艺术在生活之上，我们要看清两者的主次关系。

203"The best way to understand the character of a society is to examine the character of the men and women that the society chooses as its heroes or its heroines."
1英雄可以反映一定的时代特征让我们很好的理解那个时代
2但有些虚拟的或少见的英雄反而会让人们误解那个时代
3我们应该正确看待英雄，以正确的方式解读时代

59"Too much emphasis is placed on role models. Instead of copying others, people should learn to think and act independently and thus make the choices that are best for them."
1榜样是值得学习的
2但不能一味的效仿，要以榜样的例子结合自己的实际（人们应该用自己的实践行动结合自身的思考，从而摸索出一条自己的道路）
3 只有这样才能发现适合自己的才是最好的道理。



发现你的提纲条理很清楚。但有点看不懂，那个“正，反……”是怎么一回事？

Eileen312UID: 2648750

就是正反面的说。。。正表支持的，反表反对的