lulu的作文贴

zinccopperUID: 2403125

你的QQ需要验证信息，你的名字，呵呵，要不你加我也行啊908377931

wendychuengUID: 2811319

修改 by wendy A job with more vacation time but a low salary is better than a job with a high salary but less vacation time?. \( M: Z7 ?8 B3 T1 i      With the rapid economic boom, people are much wealthier than before. As a result, they transfer their attention（good~） from the（a） higher salary to more leisure time. A job with more vacation give them much pleasure. However, from my point of view, I prefer the job with a high salary but less vacation time.$ U) y" \" E; `/ w. M ! d9 C5 T, `! Q# W( m5 ^      First and foremost, making a living is the most vital thing for us young in this society with fierce competition. Low salary can not lead us to a good life. We should burden the responsibility of feeding ourselves as well as our families. Thus, high salary is crutial for us and the vacation is not that important（你可以表达high salary 更重要，而不用说vacation 不重要，因为你后面的例子也没有说明这一点）. More specifically, take my uncle for example. Immediately after his graduation, he chose a job which has much leisure time since he didn't want to live a life too hard. But soon he found himself wrong. Without the protection of his parents and school, he need to pay for the rent, the costs for daily expenses and so forth, not mention he had a girl friend which meant the dating payment was large either. With so limitated salary ,it was hard for him to make the ends meet.（good） Learned from this meanful lession, my uncle hunted for another job which has a much higher salary and afterwards his life turned out better, at the meantime, he grown into a mature man这个没道理吧，男生都这样的想法吗，太可怕了.         In addition, we have nothing but energy, enthusiasm and the toletrate (tolerance) of the hardship after our graduation from the colledge since we are young (这个提到句首吧). It is not a time for entertainment but starting our own career. Having too much time for fun will reduse our figting （fighting 我明白你想表达类似侵蚀我们的斗志，但是这种表达不太好） spirit, sometimes it even can form the bad habit of seeking for comfort. High salary but less vacation will encourge us to work hader which not only satisfy ourselves but also our boss. And therefore, more promotion chances will come to us. It defenitely is a benefical cycle这个观点不错.!     Admittedly, no one is a working machine, we all need to relax after a long time working. Proper recreation certainly relief us from the intense work and relax our mind as well as body. Therfore,we can plunge into our work again with good spirits. But vacation can not overweigh the high salary for the youth .        After ruminating over all these factors (good~), I prone to choose the job with a high salary but less vacation when we are young. On the other hand, when we reach our professional success and have a happy family, a job with more vacation but less salart may be a good choise. 不错不错！！！

yylbjUID: 2764695

09.05.30NA
Younger school children (ages five to ten) should be required to study art and music in addition to math, science, history and language.

The increased focus on the education of young children which is among five to ten has inspired much debate between learning art and music in addition to the basic subjects and just learning the math, science, history and language only. Some people may be right to think that study the basic lessons merely can lay a solid foundation for future study in children’s older age. However, from my point of view, I agree that learning music and art is as important as learning other basic subjects.

First and foremost, receiving art and music education in children’s young age is a fantasic time to explore children’s potential and cultivate their appreciation to life, meeting the ultimate target of education which is not only to learn those existing theories and formula, but also to develop their distinct potential and talent.Moreover, learning those subjects like maths, science and so forth is extreamly dull which is against children’s nature od activity. More specifically, take my little sister for example. Her parents found her very delight when hearing the vigorous music but upset when learning to calculate when she was six. So instead of forcing her to study maths, her parents proposed to teach her playing the piano. As a result, when my sister went to the school in her eight, she was the only one who can perform the piano in her class. This give her much confidence and she felt more motivated and thus made siginificant progress afterwards, both in study and in music.

In addition, learning art and music offers children a good way to relax themselves, this benefit will be more vital as their academic stress will become harder and harder. Good style of entertainments are needed. Take myself for example, showing interests in art in my childhood, my parents sent me to learn drawing. I have to say this is really a wise decision for drawing provides me a style to express my motion and relieve my burden from work and study. Every time when I feel bored in study or feel stuck in work, I just drop the pen and pick up the brush, devoting myself into another pure word without any annoyance. After the drawing, I can plunge into the virtual word again in good spirit.

Admittedly, basic subjects are indispensable parts of our study. Learning to calculate, speaking English, knowling the history well are fundamental skill that every child should master. Without these, we even cannot pass the exams, let alone attending the college. We should learn these subjects as well as art and music.

After ruminating all the factors, I hold the idea that guiding young children to learn music and art in addition to those basic subjects is necessary and benefitial.

梦的弃儿UID: 2840846

改完了~~

梦的弃儿UID: 2840846

改完了~~

starbigstarUID: 2855966

:) 都是些个人意见哈~ 希望对你有所帮助~
继续加油加油~~

yylbjUID: 2764695

09.07.25NA Movies and TV programs made in one’s own country are more interesting than those made in other countries?

The increasing economic boom and the advancement of the technology have proveded us many choices in terms of the movies and TV programs. We can enjoy the foreign movies and TV programs as well as thoes made in our own country. This trend has inspired much debate on which is more intreasting. Some people stick to the movies made in our own country since those movies are in accordance with the culture we are familier with. However, from my point of view, I prefer the movies and TV programs made in foreign counreies.

First and foremost, enjoying the movies and TV programs made in foreign countries offer us a good way to broaden our horizon, in addition with more specific information, history, culture, tradition and so forth of other counreies. Moreover, resulting from the shortage of money, most people choose to get touched with other countries via foreign programs. Take the “The discovery” made in the USA for example. This notable program has exerted great influence throughout the world. We can obtain the information of various animal species , splendid landscapes and the most advanced technologies from different countries through this program. It really enriches oue spare time and enlarges our view.

In addition, being more knowledgeable of the whole world is also a great force in seeking for the bright future, especially for those people who want to go abroad. It’s not rare to see people’s admiration after watching the attractive introduction of the other countries showed in foreign movies and TV programs. Take me as an example. Not long after getting in college, I began to watch the American TV programs “ The Justice” which opened the first door of foreign TV programs to me. “The justice” built the frame of American law for me and let me have more specific impression of the American legal system, containing the jury, case law as well as federalism, which are totally different from the law system of my country. At that time , the idea of studying law in the USA came to me. And therefore, now I am doing my best to prepare for the goal.

Admittedly, No one can deny that movies and TV programs native to our country also have some merits.On one hand, the language used in our movies and TV programs is easier to be understood comparing to that used in foreign programs. On the other hand, owning to the same culture and history origin, the thoughts and values conveyed by native programs and movies are the mose acceptable ones for us.

After analysing all the factors above, I prefer the foreign movies and TV programs due to it’s diversed content, the function of incentives and the unique perspective.

好吧那就这样UID: 2846511

不好意思。晚了晚了。

The increasing economic boom and the advancement of the technology have proveded us many choices in terms of the movies and TV programs（第一句看的就有些雾水，我是理解了你的意思。只是in terms of是从……的角度来说，你这话的意思是——从电影和电视节目的角度来说，经济腾飞和科技发展给了我们很多选择。初看是没错，但是细看才发现你这逻辑有问题。文章的主体是电影和电视节目，可你这句话有些本末倒置，它成了“我们从一个角度谈经济和科技给我们带来的变化”，所以建议应该改成in terms of 经济blahbalah,it provided us many choices of movies and TV programs。）
We can enjoy the foreign movies and TV programs as well as thoes made in our own country. This trend has inspired much debate on which is more intreasting. Some people stick to the movies made in our own country since those movies are in accordance with the culture we are familier with. However, from my point of view, I prefer the movies and TV programs made in foreign counreies.
First and foremost, enjoying the movies and TV programs made in foreign countries offer us a good way to broaden our horizon（在《十天突破新托福essays》上说,这个搭配已经被国人用烂了，可以改成expand our outlooks ^^） in addition with（to） more specific information, history, culture, tradition and so forth of other counreies. Moreover, resulting from the shortage of money, most people choose to get touched with other countries via foreign programs. Take the “The discovery” made in the USA for （an）example. This notable program has exerted great influence throughout the world. We can obtain the information of various animal species , splendid landscapes and the most advanced technologies from different countries through this program. It really enriches oue spare time and enlarges our view.
In addition, being more knowledgeable of the whole world is also a great force in seeking for the bright future, especially for those people who want to go abroad. It’s not rare to see people’s admiration after watching the attractive introduction of the other countries showed in foreign movies and TV programs. Take me as an example.（这个用法似乎重复了） Not long after getting in college, I began to watch the American TV programs “ The Justice” which opened the first door of foreign TV programs to me. “The justice” built the frame of American law for me and let me have more specific impression of the American legal system, containing the jury, case law as well as federalism, which are totally different from the law system of my country. At that time , the idea of studying law in the USA came to me. And therefore, now I am doing my best to prepare for the goal.
Admittedly, No one can deny that movies and TV programs native to our country also have some merits.On one hand, the language used in our movies and TV programs is easier to be understood comparing to that used in foreign programs. On the other hand, owning to the same culture and history origin, the thoughts and values conveyed by native programs and movies are the most acceptable ones for us.
After analysing all the factors above, I prefer the foreign movies and TV programs due to it’s diversed content, the function of incentives and the unique perspective.

好吧那就这样UID: 2846511

同学的语言功底赞的说！我要向你学习。只是再细看一下逻辑的地方，两个理由还是有些小问题。第一条理由是开阔眼界，其实直接可以推到第二条理由，就是让人们看了更想出去闯闯的冲动。换句话说，第二条理由其实只是把第一条理由再往前推了一步，而并非是从另外一个角度上来说国外的电影和电视节目的好处。建议你可以再天马行空地想一想。纯属我个人意见哦。

yylbjUID: 2764695

24# 好吧那就这样
哎呀妈呀终于等到改的人了~
这篇文章其实我写跑题了~快结束时才发现~懒得重写了，理由是有点牵强~呵呵~谢谢批改~

yylbjUID: 2764695

The increasing development of education has led to a trend that almost every young people in the soceity attend the college. This has made the competition in the job market much fierce than before, which also means being succeesful.is not as easy as our older generation. This phenomenon has inspired more and more debate on whether being known to those influential people or employment about your strengths and accomplishments will ensure the success. Some people may be right to opposite to this idea, claming that this is not the only way to succeed. However, I prefer to agree with the idea for the following reasons

First and foremost, being known to the employers largely determins our future development, including the promotions, new opportunities and so forth. The prerequisite of all these is to show the employers our true capability. The past accomplishments and our strengths can be the best proof. Take my brother for example. He was very confident at the beginning of working, but soon he was upset because no one paid attention to him and he just stayed where he was while some of his colleagues got the advance opportunities. Then his friends suggest him work harder, make some accomlishments and find a proper chance to demostrate all these to his boss. He did so after the suggestions. On one occation, a manager noticed him working overtime almost everyday and she was very satisfied with my brothe’s attitude. He then grasp this chance and let her know about his strengths and past achivements. Finally, he got the promotion.

In addition, those influencial people and the employers will give us precious advices which is vital to our success if you are acknowleged by him or her. As a person having gone through various difficulities. His or her suggestions and experiences, like how to deal with the relationship between customers and ourselves, how to analyze the situation, and how to behavior properly, definitely will benefit us a lot. More specifically, take Zhang Ziyi’s story as an example. She was appreciated by ZhangYimou, the most famous film director in China when she was a college student. Then she began her career and devoted herself into this career. Today she is a world famous actress and won several international prizes. Once on an interview, she said that without the director’s help and instruction, she would never achieve today’s accomplishments

After giving all these factors, we can come to the conclusion safely that being known to those influential people or the employers can bring you more advancements, more opportunities and more suggestions which are crutial to your success.

这篇文章感觉不好写，我写的字数有点多，所以只写了两个理由。狠批吧~另外希望同组的同学认真批改吧~上一组的只有一个人给我改了~晕死~

zinccopperUID: 2403125

不好意思，最近太忙，没有及时给你批改，但是看了你的作文后，知道自己其实也改不了什么了

伶女UID: 2797207

个人意见，写在这里咯～～
也欢迎来拍砖～～:)

bruce520UID: 2634940

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