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[活动] Alex 的作文本 [复制链接]

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发表于 2010-8-14 01:43:20 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
开始参加活动咯~
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沙发
发表于 2010-8-14 01:44:41 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 alex0795 于 2010-8-14 04:57 编辑

8月14号作业


09.08.07NA      Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents should allow children to make their own choices rather than determine their children’s future for them.



Parents are the people who have seen we grown up and know us most. Therefore, the advices from parents are paremount importance for the children. However, to say parents should dtermine their childens’ future is overstatement.

First and it is always top of my point of view is that only children themselves can know themselves better, no one can realize the truest feeling in your heart even the parents who saw us grow up ,and parents’ choice is not always benefit for their child.Take my brother Alex for example, when Alex was in the high school, there was a good chance to take part in the exam of a art school, and Alex was very interested in art when he was a child. So he wanted to try to take that exam. His parents, however, wanted their child to study finace.Therefore, they locked Alex in the room and prevented Alex from studying art. Now, Alex is in the finacial department of a famous university. He told me, however, that he is not happy at all and he is trying to drop out the   school. Clearly, if the parents play the role who determine childrens’ future, they are very likely to ignore children’s feeling and make the wrong decision.

What’s more, parents determine their childrens’ future can be harmful to children’s growth. In this ultra competitive society, to make a choice is the most common occurance in our lives. Therefore, how can a individual whoes parents always help him/her to make a choice to success? Parents cannot always be arounded with one, let the children make choice for themselves as soon as possible is paramount improtence to childrens’ growth. This will make children more intelligent and more mature.

Admittedly, parents help their children to make a choice based on their own experiences is very helpful to their children, since it can avoid their children make some mistakes which they have made. However, people will get more mature sometimes when they realy encounter some failures.

As all I said above, we may safely arrive the conclusion that parents should not determine their children’s lives, because that the children are the people who know themsleves best and this would be harmful to childrem’s growth. Even though children will make some mistakes when they make choices by themselves, these mikstakes will help children to be more mature.

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板凳
发表于 2010-8-14 21:04:53 |只看该作者
帮你顶下,加油

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地板
发表于 2010-8-15 00:41:01 |只看该作者
修改好啦~~~

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fanfan1247

8.14 fanfan1247修改Alex.doc (25.5 KB, 下载次数: 14)

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发表于 2010-8-15 17:27:25 |只看该作者
提示: 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽

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发表于 2010-8-17 21:00:32 |只看该作者
8月17日交
2008.5.16 NA            
writing: 是telephone 还是television对人类的有more effect
14.54

Telephone and television are the most excellent inventions in the human history. A notion that television is more effective to humans than telephone is advocated by some critics. The implicit rationale behind the statement is that telephone pales in importance compared to television. It might be tempting to agree with this assertion on the basis that nearly every family on the earth possessed at least one television. However, I can not fully approve of this statement. I strongly contend that the telephones are more effective to human beings than the television due to the following factors.
First, as the development of the telephone, it narrows the distance of the whole world. In other words, every part of the earth was linked by the telephone tightly. Let’s consider the following hypothetical situation. If a Chinese student Wang Tao goes to UCLA to finish his master degree and want to keep in touch with his family and friends in Beijing. In which way he could have it made? Flying back to Beijing is out of ways. Thanks to the telephone, to use a telephone to call his family and friends is the best and effective way to finish this goal. Therefore, telephone provides a short cut for people who were located different places to communicate easily.
What’s more, it is the most common thing for the modern people, no matter what kinds of job they do, ranging from businessman to professor, to use telephone in the daily lives. According to the China Daily, more than 78 percent people in the research show that they use the telephone to work or to communicate with their friends for at least half hour per day. Consequently, telephone is definitely changing our life style tremendously and we can not live without telephone even one day.
Admittedly, the televisions have huge influenced on the modern society because televisions broadcast the news on its screen to all parts of the world immediately and as an entertainment to all ages of people. However, this alone can not provides it has more effect on humans than telephone does. In other words, television pales in importance compared to the telephone to out society.
After balancing all the factors I mentioned above, we may safely arrived to the conclusion that the telephones have more impact on the human beings than the televisions do because it make people communicate more easily and change the people’s live style.

超时!!! 哎~

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发表于 2010-8-18 12:27:47 |只看该作者
第1段第2句,头重脚轻了,建议a notion is advocatied by some critics that...
第1段最好不要说理由,也不要批驳反对的观点,只表明态度
第2段第1句,distance of the world 感觉搭配不对
注意不要只说TELEPHONE的好处,最好加一些对比,也就是telephone相比television影响更大的理由。
还有一个问题,书面语中一般不用'这个缩写的撇号,what is more,而不是what's more,分开写字数也多一个嘛,是吧^_^
很多句型运用得很熟练;第2段用了假设的生活中的例子,很聪明;我感觉这篇文章风格很像GRE的argument,呵呵,有几个句型单词很熟

我的水平有限,很多都是根据自己的经验还有别人给我的建议来提的,欢迎作者继续探讨

PS,我发不了附件,所以只好回复在这里,作者表介意哦~

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发表于 2010-8-28 21:04:36 |只看该作者
8-28.doc (25 KB, 下载次数: 18)     8.28 作业 !!~~·

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发表于 2010-8-30 11:09:55 |只看该作者
8-28 by alex

8-28 by alex.doc

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发表于 2010-8-31 15:10:12 |只看该作者
这两天不能上网 改晚了 见谅啊

8-28 by alex.doc

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