9.2作文，xdjm帮忙多多指正，辛苦啦

primrose0519UID: 2887617

大家帮忙指正，使劲拍砖，谢谢xdjm了！~~
The perpetual problem that" Should university students take part-time jobs or not?" constantly confronts us. Different people hold quite different views of it. Some firmly believe that taking part-time jobs is a dispensable part of getting access to a successful career, while others may take it for granted that we students should focus all on the major. Well, as far as I am concerned, this problem is actually based on a case-by-case bias.

First and foremost, for the students who do not possess a glorious and influential background, they have to depend on themselves to seek their fortune and live out their dreams. Taking part time jobs is a rational choice not only for the reason that they can earn some money to make better their life quality, alleviate economical tensions, also that it is a definitely advantageous opportunity for their career preparation. I mean they can obtain skills or experiences, construct good interpersonal relationships and social connections, which may act as an imperative role in their future job hunting process. Of course, this kind of choice is also available to those who are not quite satisfied with their majors or want to change their professions. It can never be denied that taking part time job actually take up a large amount of one's time and distract vigor to some extent despite the advantages it brings.

However, according to situations of various individuals, there certainly exist the population who have a preference towards scientific research. This group of people enjoy the delight while delving into the science problems and want to make a difference in their field.
Considering their cases, taking part-time jobs is not appropriate for them and will certainly have an adverse influence on their study. They have to concentrate on their major which is the cardinal qualification that scholars should possess. Taking my roommate as an example, she make use of her part time to work as a tutor, although she can earn money at an early age that may be jealous by others, she could not spare enough time for major study, especially for us medical students. As a consequence, she cannot do very well as an internship in hospital and finally lose the chance to be promoted as a free-interview graduate. And other students utilize and cherish the chances as an internship in hospital, they consequently gain a lot clinical skills.

Last but not least, as the famous saying goes" Everything has its good and bad sides." We should consider our own conditions and explore the value of taking part-time job or concentrating on study to its fullest extents, as long as it serves the best interest of us.

littleecho33UID: 2876349

The perpetual problem that" Should university students take part-time jobs or not?" constantly confronts us. Different people hold quite different views of it. Some firmly believe that taking part-time jobs is a dispensable part of getting access to a successful career, while others may take it for granted that we students should focus all on the major. Well, as far as I am concerned, this problem is actually based on a case-by-case bias.（模板痕迹还是太强， 在句式上还是应多求变化 尤其在练习得时候 考场上用自然不用说啦~）
5 Y! [' _  }% e( a
  i  N! g  o8 F2 Y. {First and foremost, for the students who do not possess a glorious and influential background, they have to depend on themselves to seek their fortune and live out their dreams.（good!） Taking part time jobs is a rational choice （for）not only they can earn some money to make better their life quality, alleviate economical tensions, also it is a definitely advantageous opportunity for their career preparation.(这个句式我简化了下 对照原文看看) I mean they can obtain skills or experiences, construct good interpersonal relationships and social connections, which may act as an imperative role in their future job hunting process. Of course, this kind of choice is also available to those who are not quite satisfied with their majors or want to change their professions. It can never be denied that taking part time job actually take up a large amount of one's time and distract vigor to some extent despite the advantages it brings.
. s( n8 g- x( T$ t/ u6 J- Z0 N ) z% T1 ?. K" k- f8 s
However, according to situations of various individuals, there certainly exist the population（a proportion of students） who have a preference towards scientific research. This group of people enjoy the delight while delving into the science problems and want to make a difference in their field.
; `4 M- J' b1 F+ X1 b7 j$ h2 d( N  NConsidering their cases, taking part-time jobs is not appropriate for them and will(may even) certainly have an adverse influence on their study. They have to concentrate on their major which is the cardinal qualification that scholars should possess. Taking my roommate as an example, she make use of her part time to work as a tutor, although she can earn money at an early age that（，which） may be jealous by others, she could not spare enough time for major study, especially for us medical students. As a consequence, she cannot do very well as an internship in hospital and finally lose the chance to be promoted as a free-interview graduate. And other students utilize and cherish the chances as an internship in hospital, they consequently gain a lot clinical skills.(这段用此很棒)
5 O9 @9 F6 R" y   ?9 }0 [' z, g0 |" m% p, @1 B
Last but not least, as the famous saying goes" Everything has its good and bad sides." We should consider our own conditions and explore the value of taking part-time job or concentrating on study to its fullest extents, as long as it serves the best interest of us.# e2 d

littleecho33UID: 2876349

怎么说这种写法确实很冒险，能正反面都写并且写得好，那肯定是优秀作文。但是，考场上，除非你有信心确实准备过再决定这种方式。 看得出来，你的词汇量很大，而且很能善于应用。有很多很好的表达，值得学习

primrose0519UID: 2887617

People are constantly confronted with the problem that whether it is proper for parents to determine the future of their children or allow children to make decisions on their own. Debates about the topic have never ceased since its inception. Some people hold the view that parents should help with the determinations on children's future, for adults have adequate experiences about making significant decisions and can distinguish the right and wrong. Others may argue against that point by reasoning that children have privileges to make choices about their future. I believe the answer is a case-by-case situation, we should treat different children with different strategies.

Some children are eager to make choices on their own by arguing that they have grown mature enough to be an independent individual. So they take it for granted that everything should be approved of in accord to their preferences. Mostly, this group of children behave out of the rebellious psychology. Inversely, they even do not stretch out an explicit and sane plan of their future. In such cases, parents should play a crucial role as the guider and adviser to lead them into the correct direction without any hesitation. For the sake that parents definitely have abundant experiences and theories provided for the children. Or the children may be faced up with unpredicted obstacles and setbacks which may severely frustrate their confidence and motivation. Parents may easily help children make preparations for their career and avert unnecessary toughness.

Well, things may become quite distinctive for children who are conscious of themselves and with strong self-control. This type of children are always holding rational perceptions and can depend on themselves well dealing with various cases. They often have their own concepts towards affairs and can challenge difficulties, take adventures, delve into their interests, come up with innovations and so on so forth. For these relatively independent children, we had better let go their holds and encourage them to strive for their own destinations instead of interfering too much. What they need actually are opportune time and appreciation. Maybe parents can give some advice at appropriate time that may result in better consequences. Considering this, we can draw the conclusion that for thoughtful children we should utilize their value by their own methods without too many interference.

In summary, as far as I am concerned, it is up to the children's conditions to decide whether parents should help choose their future. As long as it does benefit to children, we should explore the best solutions to serve the best interest of children's future.

johnmclainUID: 2676153

4# primrose0519
GOOD JOB

primrose0519UID: 2887617

谢谢，我会继续努力的，大家一起加油！↖(^ω^)↗
5# johnmclain

primrose0519UID: 2887617

9月9号作文 agree or disagree it is only worth watching movies that can teach us something about real life5，xdjm辛苦了！~~尽情批改~~:loveliness:
There are many considerations or factors that people may take into account when making comments on a movie. There never exist an absolute boundary between worth watching movies and worthless movies. According to different people, various flavors of movies may differ a lot and have quite distinctive influences on understanding of real life. To me, given all aspects and dimensions, I would believe it is a qualified yes to the statement.

In the current world, movies have evolved into a multi-billion dollar industry and have enormous impact almost on every facet of our life. We watch movies as an indispensable way of entertainment, which can efficiently alleviate tensions from work or study. We have to admit that movies virtually create a plenty of joy in our life. In the process, we obtain enjoyment and at the same time we may facilitate friendship and promote social connections. Thus, teaching us better to handle with the complex interpersonal relationship. In addition, when we enjoy films about science and technology, it is naturally providing an effective access to keeping pace with modern scientific knowledge. These kinds of movies are worthy to have a try, which lead us to make progress and adaptable to the community.

In innumerable movies, major characters who have noble personality or achieve huge success by living through many obstacles and setbacks, are of great value for us to learn and imitate. Forrest Gump, the 1993 Hollywood blockbuster and Academy- award winning film, is a magnificent movie without any doubt. I can vividly remember the protagonist Gump , with an IQ of 75 and a reputation of being an idiot, achieves great success with every endeavor he lays his hand at: he meets with two American presidents, becomes a Vietnam War hero, even comes to China to play Ping-pong, and becomes a millionaire by doing business of shrimps. We can conclude that in our real life, whatever bad situations we may be trapped in, with determination and persistent efforts, nothing will be impossible. This is an example of a worth watching movie that can actually teach us something.

As we all know, due to the advanced technology, too many resources of movies are diffusing through Internet, some bad movies, which contain violence, yellow episodes, criminal methods and so on so forth, have tremendous adverse influence on the youth's development. Some juvenile delinquencies are imitated from these unhealthy plots. We should advocate the significance of worth watching movies and advert bad movies in case of damaging the passionate and aggressive young people.

Finally, to put it into a nutshell, we should make deliberate selections when watching movies. As long as it is of worth, we should explore its benefits to its fullest extents to serve the best interest of our life.

wttyuseUID: 2755832

7# primrose0519
http://www.rayfile.com/zh-cn/files/9bf09fb3-bce0-11df-8850-0015c55db73d/ 放在rayfile里了，麻烦下一下

primrose0519UID: 2887617

多谢关于第一段和第二段的建议，我仔细想了一下，前面的逻辑确实混乱了点，谢谢你！~~:loveliness: 8# wttyuse

zsy2912371UID: 2852365

There are many considerations or factors that people may take into account when making comments on a movie. There never exist an absolute boundary between worth watching movies and worthless movies. According to different people, various (重复)flavors of movies may differ a lot and have quite distinctive influences on understanding of real life. To me, given all aspects and dimensions, I would believe it is a qualified yes to the statement
In the（应该不需要） current world, movies have evolved into a multi-billion dollar industry and have enormous impact almost on every facet of our life. We watch movies as an indispensable way of entertainment（这句话语法有问题，主语变成了movies）, which can efficiently alleviate tensions （tension不可数）from work or study. We have to admit that movies virtually create a（不要a） plenty of joy in our life. In the process, we obtain enjoyment and at the same time we may facilitate friendship and promote social connections. Thus, teaching us better to handle with the complex interpersonal relationship. In addition, when we enjoy films about science and technology, it is naturally providing an effective access to keeping(keep) pace with modern scientific knowledge. These kinds of movies are worthy to have a try, which lead us to make progress and adaptable to the community.

In innumerable movies, major characters who have noble personality or achieve huge success by living through many obstacles and setbacks, are of great value for us to learn and imitate. Forrest Gump, the 1993 Hollywood blockbuster and Academy- award winning film, is a magnificent movie without any doubt. I can vividly remember the protagonist Gump , with an IQ of 75 and a reputation of being an idiot, achieves great success with every endeavor he lays his hand at: he meets with (不要)two American presidents, becomes a Vietnam War hero, even comes to China to play Ping-pong, and becomes a millionaire by doing business of shrimps. We can conclude that in our real life, whatever bad situations we may be trapped in, with determination and persistent efforts, nothing will be impossible. This is an example of a worth watching movie that can actually teach us something.

As we all know, due to the advanced technology, too many resources of(可以不要) movies are diffusing through Internet, some bad movies, which contain violence, yellow episodes, criminal methods and so on so forth, have tremendous adverse influence on the youth's development. Some juvenile delinquencies are imitated from these unhealthy plots. We should advocate the significance of worth watching movies and advert bad movies in case of damaging the passionate and aggressive young people.

Finally, to put it into a nutshell, we should make deliberate selections when watching movies. As long as it is of worth, we should explore its benefits to its fullest extents to serve the best interest of our life.

词汇很丰富，开头很亮，注意下语法问题
定语从句用的太频繁了（其实我一样~）
倒数第二段感觉偏题了

最后改的有点晚 见谅

primrose0519UID: 2887617

9月18号作文，辛苦啦，多谢
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Sports teach people lessons about life
There are certain considerations and factors people may take into account when mentioning about sports. Sports are presented with various forms and are of great benefit to health definitely confirmed by a large amount of scientific evidence. We are constantly confronted with the question whether sports have vital influence on life. Although different group may launch into a fierce polemic against each other, I believe that sports are an indispensable part of teaching life.

We may all focus on the television or even cannot tear ourselves away when watching the Olympic Games. In the most glorious and magnificent competition across the globe, many athletes of the highest level compete fiercely presenting us with a splendid and stimulating feast for eyes. We all acclaim for the competitors and look forward to their wonderful performance. Have we thought about why people admire them so much? They can make a big difference and achieve huge success today in the field of sport due to their perseverance and determination.
The ability to persevere in their profession despite obstacles and setbacks is the most important and imperative qualification that a successful athlete should possess. As we can see, it is the sports that teach the player only with persistent endeavor can they make progress and preeminent individuals.

Personal story and experiences prove that sport can play an crucial role in life and teach us life terms such as self confidence. I vividly remember what I was when enrolling at university. A shy, timid, introvert eighteen year old girl who might flush and stammered in presence of strangers. Exposed to various sports and running association of our university, I participated in a lot of exercise and persist a whole semester. When I met with difficulties in life, I implied myself that
it was just like the marathon, if I have confidence in me, I would make it as I won the marathon. Little by little, the girl who flushed easily was gone and a confident and positive girl was emerging. From the sports, we can attain a lot as long as we try to explore the benefits of it to the fullest extent.

Coincident with concerns about the advantages of sports, a growing trend to take sports is prevalent among people. Besides the fact that doing sports can help construct our body, it practically teach us some truth about life. So from many dimensions and aspects of sports, we had better join in the legions of people now.