sylvia的独立作文贴

naturekdUID: 2702801

先发一篇，求拍，thanks:)
At universities and colleges, sports and social activities are just as important as classes and libraries and should receive equal financial support.

Nowadays, sports and social activities arespawned in universities and colleges as people are more eager for a colorfulcampus life and a strong body. an increased number of people are consciousabout that physical fitness and social life are as important as their studies. So,an argument that calls for equal financial support for social life and classesemerges. Admittedly, sports and social activities are a main part in people'sdaily life, but equal financial support for social life and classes will gocontra with the essential task of a university and college ---- to educatepeople.
What's the main purpose of founding auniversity and a college? The fundamental task of a university and a college isto provide chances for people accepting education and thus people can acquirethe knowledge for their careers. A good university is not a university withwell built gymnasium but with good teachers and libraries. Therefore, for thelong-term development of a university and college, it is better to fulfill theeducation financial need first. As for the need of sports equipments andfinancial support to social activities, people can search other alternativeways to solve this problem. For example, people can make use of the sportsequipments in their community and people can enjoy the colorful social life inthe wide real social but not limited in the school.
Even though education is the basicobligation of a university and college, it doesn't mean we should not providefinancial support to the sports and social activities. After all physicalfitness and social behavior are an important part in people's life. No one canonly study but pay no attention to their health and society. Students must keepa good health to attend the classes and commute with other people to get newideas. so the sports and social activities are also need for financial support.But need doesn't mean the equality with the financial support to the education.People should always aware of the fundamental task of a university and acollege.
University and college must keep sober inthe extent of importantance of education and other affairs that related to theeducation. sports and social activities are necessary to students but not themost fundamental one. So the balance in this should be considered by auniversity and college.

naturekdUID: 2702801

parents help determined the future of their children or children allow to make their own choices.
When you were a child, did you make choice by yourself or surrender to your parents? As for me, I am always the one that my parents make choice instead of me. So I spent much time hoping growing older in my childhood. Admittedly, sometime children may be not old enough to make choice by themselves and they are always confusing with the adults' world, but children should be gave sufficient freedom to make choice in their familiar fields.
First, most of the time parents' choices can not represent children's choices well. There are big differences between the world of children and adults which result from the large gap of the age. Perhaps children in three to five years old are fond of simple toys that can make voice or radiate light. While parents expect the toys can improve children's intelligence. To the older children, they may want to play more time but not be limited in the room by their parents to study something. If parents make most of the choices instead of children, the children will not get what they really want to do and acquire. Even though sufficient materials are provided for the growing up of children, they will not be happy with this.
Second, it is better to the mental development of training children to make choices for themselves. If a child can not always be fulfilled, there may be a negative effect on their psychology. They may become more easily agitate and behavior contra with parents. What's more, permitting children to make choices for themselves helps a lot with children to understand the world. Children make choice by themselves and experience the result brought by the decision, this procedure will help children to make a distinction with the wrong and right of the world. In this sense, children making choice by themselves benefit a lot to their mental development.
In sum, parents should be confident with children and respect their own opinions. Parents should play an assistant role during children making their determination but not a determining role.

写完发现自己没有注意到题目当中的future，只注意到choice了，第一篇作业，求批，谢谢。

bbliangUID: 2604466

不好意思，近来开学比较忙，抱歉！抱歉！

naturekdUID: 2702801

914作业：
do you agree ordisagree: having jobs with low paying salary and being high secure is betterthan jobs with high salary but being easy to lost



Suppose there are two kinds of jobs ---- one job with low paying salary but high secure, the other job with high salary but easy to lost,which one would you choose? As for me, I prefer the first one because salary is not the only measurement to determine whether a job is good enough. Sometimes,a job with high secure can bring more other things which can not be brought by high salary.



Firstly, the condition in nowadays job searching market is not good. It is hard for one searching for a new job. Each year millions of students graduate from universities or colleges. One is not sure of being competitive enough when comparing with these new graduates. Even though people who have attended a job may have more experience, as the rapid paces of technology improvement, these new graduates are always equipped with new developed technologies which lack by people who have graduated earlier. What'smore, usually a lower salary is required by new graduates than people who have experience. In this sense, no one can ensure that the companies prefer experienced workers than new graduates.



Secondly, high secure leaves one person with little stress,which benefits one's health and career. If one spends all the day worryingabout a dismissal, there is no doubt he or she is in high pressure. As we know,high pressure can increase the danger of suffering from the cancer and heart diseases. And with high pressure, a worker may perform less efficient and make more mistakes than workers in lower stress, which in turn results to the loss of a job. In addition, people will pay less attention on making a long term plan which is important to the success in one's career for a job easily to be lost. People treat a job easily to be lost as a temporary station.! Z% p& `9 E$ N  k.z  R, j And the more frequently a person changes his job, the less knowledge he can learn from ajob, the less possibility for one's success in career.

   

       In sum, in a short time, job with high salary but being easy to lost may be workable, but in along term view, a job with high secure is better for one's success in career.

凼凼55667UID: 2904147

Suppose there are two kinds of jobs ---- one job with low paying salary but high secure, the other job with high salary but easy to lost, which one would you choose? As for me, I prefer the first one because salary is not the only measurement to determine whether a job is good enough. Sometimes, a job with high secure can bring more other things which can not be brought by high salary.

Firstly, the condition in nowadays job searching market is not good. It is hard for one searching for a new job. Each year millions of students graduate from universities or colleges. One is not sure of being competitive enough when comparing with these new graduates. Even though people who have attended a job may have more experience, as the rapid paces of technology improvement, these new graduates are always equipped with new developed technologies which lack by people who have graduated earlier. What'smore, usually a lower salary is required by new graduates than people who have experience. In this sense, no one can ensure that the companies prefer experienced workers than new graduates.

Secondly, high secure leaves one person with little（建议改low） stress,which benefits one's health and career. If one spends all the day worrying about a dismissal, there is no doubt he or she is in high pressure. As we know,high pressure can increase the danger of suffering from the cancer and heart diseases. And with high pressure, a worker may perform less efficient and make more mistakes than workers in lower stress, which in turn results to the loss of a job. In addition, people will pay less attention on making a long term plan which is important to the success in one's career for a job easily to be lost. People treat a job easily to be lost as a temporary station.And the more frequently a person changes his job, the less knowledge he can learn from ajob, the less possibility for one's success in career.
   
       In sum, in a short time, job with high salary but being easy to lost may be workable, but in along term view, a job with high secure is better for one's success in career.，
优点：层次清晰，论证与论点支持得很好
不足：1，第一个理由论证得过于充分，挤压了后面的结构。
2，句式有些单一。可以多用一些物主句，使文章更地道一些。

我也写了这篇，有空也来指教一下吧，O(∩_∩)O~
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... xtra=#pid1774359868

wttyuseUID: 2755832

谢谢批改，回改咯~~

naturekdUID: 2702801

916作业
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Movies and televisions should always show audience good people are being rewarded and bad people are being punished.

Nowadays, media like television plays an important role in people's daily life. A great proportion of the information acquired each day comes from television. Moreover, the contents of the plays or news appeared on the television affect people's value system a lot. So what should be broadcasted on television and what should not become a topic concerned by people. In my view, I don't regard it as a necessary that good people are always being rewarded and bad people are being punished in movies and plays.

To begin with, an assertion accepted commonly is that life is not always ideal; therefore it is not necessary that the life in the movies or on the television is ideal. There is no law in the world is perfect. And it is the same with the reward system. What we must admit is the society is not completely fair. Consequently, it is better for television and movies giving us a real world but not a world ideal and without any unjustness. Even though it will benefit a society by advocating award to good people and punishment to bad people, these should mainly depend on the allocation system and the law of a society, it is not the task of television and movies. What television and movies should do is to reveal a real world to us and leave people to distinguish the right from the wrong by themselves.
Secondly, a significant function of the media is to supervise the government and to reveal the unfairness in the society. The wide audiences of television are the most effective supervisors to the government. For a better and fairer society, the media has the responsibility to reveal the unfairness and illegality in the society to the public. And it is right the things being done by the media now. As for the programs which do not record facts such as the TV play series and movies, there are also a kind of such series and movies that insinuate the problems in the society. These can also alarm the leader and the government. As this important role of supervising the government, revealing the unfairness in the society is the avoidless obligation of media.
In sum, as we all live in a society with unfairness it needs not to build an unreal world in television. The perfect but unreal world can only confuse people and thus undermining people's capability of adapting to the real world. On contrary, the reveal of the unfairness can contribute the improvement of the whole society.

naturekdUID: 2702801

9月21日作业


09.05.30NA  Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Younger schoolchildren (ages five to ten) should be required to study art and music inaddition to math, science, history and language.




Whether younger school children should be forced to receive education on art? In my opinion, art, as a part of our life, is better to be added to the courses of young children. With the knowledge of the art, children can better realize the beauty in the world and thus improving the feeling of happiness.

With the admitting of most people, art is an important part in people's daily life. Art does not merely stand for the paintings in the gallery or the concert with expensive tickets. Art fills all the corners in the world and all the times in our lives. Art is all the things about beauty. When people are determining which clothes should wear or enjoying the music, they are involving with the art. Therefore art education as well as the education of beauty is a necessary for every person, and the knowledge in art is as important as the knowledge in other subjects such as math, science and language. Art, just as the flavor of a dish, makes our lives more colorful.

Second, as a large proportion of the children's families can not afford to the education in art in the society, school has its responsibility to provide the courses in art. With parents paying more attention to the education of children, the organizations providing an education of art become popular. But as the scarce of the teachers of these special subjects and the expense of the instruments of these courses, it is very expensive for children receiving special training in art. Even many parents want their children to receive education in art, they can not afford it. In this condition, it is the obligatory of school to provide chances for these children. With the financial support, the school can make art education available to every child.

In sum, art is an indispensible part in our lives. If we want to enjoy the life better, the education of art may be a good choice. And for young children, the art courses in school are the best method for their accession to the field of art.

ElijahhUID: 2707404

呀，楼主也叫sylvia，我刚也发了个批改贴~

naturekdUID: 2702801

没事，我用naturekd，寄托id是这个，没法改～

naturekdUID: 2702801

9.28 作业

naturekdUID: 2702801

1天1套tpo+作业（作文背诵一篇，口语加15题），4号完成delta，10号完成barron，14号完成kaplan。要求每天写笔记。

naturekdUID: 2702801

10月2号作业

cairen1986UID: 2599310

13# naturekd


改完了

思遥UID: 2865808

10月2日交
08.12.07NA  Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: Spending time alone is the best way to relieve stress

As the competition is becoming more and more intensive, people sustain heavier stresses. Consequently, various methods to relieve stresses spring out. Some people prefer to spend time alone to relieve stress, while some other people choose to spend their time with their friends. In my opinion, I prefer to play with my friends and thus getting help from them in the process of relieving stress.
With the conclusion in psychology science, the most effective way for one relieving stress or pain is to tell the feeling to other people. To tell means that to share the feeling with other people, which makes people feel that they are not alone anymore. With the company and comfort from the friends, the stress can be relieved a little. Moreover, with the replies from the friends, one may find a good way to solve the problems bringing the stress. This just as the old saying goes:" One stone two birds." Telling your feeling to the others can not only make you relieve but also can eradicate the sources of the stress.
Second, spending time with your friends can draw your attention away from the problems bringing the stress. When people are alone, it is easy for them concentrating on the hardships, which will intense the stress. But when people are together with their friends, a proportion of the attention will be transferred to their friends. With little attention to the hardships, the stress will be relieved. What's more, people have more choices to kill the time when they are together than alone. For example, people can play games, do sports and have party together and such things that can not implement by only one person. The fun brought by these activities is good medicine for relieving the stress.
In sum, it is better for people spending time with their friends when they are sustaining stress. Comforts and supports from your friends are the best medicines for your relieving stress and that's one of the most important reasons why we need for friends.
1既然第三段提及到SECOND，第二段也应提到表示顺序的词。
2第二段开头需要增加一个中心论点的句子。
3第二段最好加一个简短的例子。
4第三段写的不错：） 用词都很恰当 句式也不错