hapo2005的作文

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We always heard mum complained about their kids. The most significant reason leads to the complaint is the mass room decoration(装饰？可以删掉). Mum believe that only with a clean and tidy room, kids can easier删（enable）（it is easier for children） to concentrate themselves on study. On the other hand, kids used to have the mass room and 删whereas, kids consider that the clan room is the symbol of a (?) they (缺动词are) even proud of their untidy decoration, for the room of their friends are mass up（messed up） and the thought that only the docile kids would spend tome on their room. In my point of view, I assist （the） kids, whose room are dirty, would not achieve success as easy as those who used to tidy up their room(rooms).%



First and foremost, the decoration of a person’s room revels(reveals) his/her personality. People who accustom to clean their room consciously hold the virtues of polite and hardworking. There are (a) lot of examples (that) can (be) prove, say, (Take the competition between boys and girls as example,). It is well know that in both the field of working and studying, girls put much more effort than that of the boys. With woman’s(women) and children’s right draw more attention in the whole world, namely that the treatment of the female is the same as that of the male, (After the period of the right of the children and woman rose to a new horizon, )删girls learn to clear their mind and try their best to prove themselves in different aspects. In order to get rid of the traditional concepts that instilled into the character of female during the ancient age, girls possessed various skills though studying. In my school, girls’ average grades are always higher than that of the boys’. Regardless of the academic fields, in various sport competitions, girls gradually suppressed boys. The girls’ ping-pong team in my school, representing my city, won the world class match. In the opposite, the boys’ team could not get the promotion to the provincial games. Why girls won so much, but boys got loose? I believe the answer is quite apparent because girl has（注意这些小问题，出现太多会影响到评卷人的心情） learned to concentrate themselves during the games. How to gain this ability? You will get the answer just by looking at their dorm （rooms）. Though tidying up their rooms, they have really clear ideas that how to site the different material删（personal stuffs）, (which the same as the) 删which resembling the skill of playing ping-pong. 偏题啦~咋讲到男女差异了呢？


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Also, mostly, people possessing nest and well-organized room（people’s ……rooms） tend to care about their appearance which is really essential in the interview. Without saying, when we apply for a specific job, learning to wear a smart dress and have a well-behaved manner sometimes can be crucial. However, if the job hunter do not acknowledge several ceremonies, he would probably reject by the administer immediately. As a matter of fact, the character of people living in untidy room is careless(People who live in untidy rooms are always careless and reckless) , so(and) they pay no(极端) attention to this triviality, leading them fail in the application. $ y/ @( b4 D& V# M

To sum up, I consider after a child learn to organize their room, they will gain many good manners.
LZ还需要很多练习，practice makes perfection.
加强语法、论证和小的细节改进。
勿跑题。
前段时间考试，晚交了，望谅解。