TPO6 综合写作习作 求批改（如果在北京可以bg） 与一些问题讨论

zh8788UID：2924314

In the lecture, the speaker focuses on the strengths of the communal online encyclopedias, challenging what is stated in the reading passage that the communal online version lacks academic credentials, is prone to be changed and has too extensive topics.

To begin with, the lecturer claims that traditional encyclopedia also has errors that may last a long period, which rejects the point in the reading that online encyclopedia is inaccurate while the traditional one adheres to the academic standard. From the lecturer, every version of encyclopedia has errors and the error information in the online version is easily to correct.

In addition, the lecturer goes on to discuss the issue that the online version can be protected from being tampered by the hackers. According to the lecturer, people can make the crucial part of the encyclopedia to be read only. Also we can hire special editor to protect the version. This perspective also opposes the content in the reading that online encyclopedia is easy to be changed and tampered by others.

Furthermore, the author also opposes the writer's expectation by emphasizing that the communal one has wide range of subjects. On the contrary, about the same problem, the writer insists that online encyclopedia gives people a false impression of the important part and the trivial part of the knowledge. In order to demonstrate his standpoint, the lecturer persuades us with the evidence that communal one does have the information of traditional encyclopedia. What's more, it has more information that the traditional one cannot provide.

：写了好几篇了，有以下问题
1. 开头
lacks academic credentials, is prone to be changed and has too extensive topics. 概括阅读的，这样写好吗， 三个动词， 其中还有 is 这样的系动词感觉很别扭
2. 重复使用专有名词
比如本文的encyclopedia 我用了很多次， 顶多有时候换成one， 一般文章都是这样的专有名词，大家是怎么处理的

不胜感谢了～～～

Rina9311UID：2986898

下面是我的大作，哈哈，互勉一下
The lecture talks about the theory that communal online encyclopedia have abundant advantages. He says the theory in the passage is different and somewhat inaccurate when compare to the benefit we get from the communal online encyclopedia.

First, errs in the communal online encyclopedia is not a big deal since errs show in printed communal encyclopedia too. None of the academic have ever reach perfect, which means doing academic is a way to search the real answer of question. And also communal online encyclopedia is easy be recorrected. This directly contradicted to which the passage indicates.

Second, a lot work was done to prevent online hacking. One is set the encyclopedia as a format that no one can change it. Another solution is arranging people to monitor the encyclopedia to aware even small change. This is another part where experience contradicted theory.

Third, all the communal online encyclopedia is the main part of the academic document due to online size limitation. If no bar to size we may want to put everything together online. But, since the occupation is arranged, the author definitely uploads the key part of the encyclopedia. And online encyclopedia show many kinds of academic theories which easy for all the people to search to use.