求牛人给修改润色小女的motivation letter

落雨蔷薇UID: 3072108

本人工作几年之后想要申请法国SKEMA 奢侈品管理硕士学位。 跪求牛人帮小女修改和润色motivation letter


Motivation letter-

In 2005, I graduated with a bachelors degree
from XXin Beijing of China, My major was XXAfter my graduation, i joined in Air China, one of the biggest airline company in China as a flight attendant. Due to my outstanding job performance and managerial potential, after 3 years, I was assigned to an exchange internship programme in Cathay pacific Airlines which is in HK. It was a great experience. Being a flight attendant broadened my
horizon, and know more about this whole world. The more place I have traveled, the more clear about my dreams deep in my heart. So I quit from Air China after I finished the exchange internship programme and joined in HK China National Duty Free Merchandise Co.,LTD.by the end of 2010.
In this innovative multi-national company, I have not only witnessed one of the success patterns of modern business, but also felt a distinct need for continued learning and growth to move into an upper-level management position.
I choose SKEMA for several reasons. First, France is not only famous for its romanticism but also gains a wide range reputation in Europe for its distinguished education industry. Second, SKEMA is one of the TOP business schools in France. In addition, the EURO MBA project on luxury brand management, food & wine, is taught entirely in English and organized around two acclaimed axes of prestige: Bordeaux (world capital of fine wine), and Paris (epicenter and birthplace of luxury). Students participate in a variety of seminars taught by industry leaders and workshops run by recognized experts which would be quite helpful in my future career as a management professional in China.
Nowadays China’s luxury brand market has grown so rapidly as to become the second luxury brand consuming country in 2010. A rapidly increasing number of individuals begin to concentrate on the life quality and are glad to know and buy luxury products.My past training, however, has not prepared me to deal with the broad strategic issues faced by executives.   At this stage of my life, Attaining an MBA is a logical and major step for me in preparing for a bright and successful managerial career.My learning experience with the SKEMA's Euro MBA program will absolutely help my future career development in China.
I believe I am ready to study this program.
Thanks for your time and consideration. I look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,

keijUID: 3046435

1# 落雨蔷薇
感觉很多地方读起来都不是很地道
结构最好按照：1brief introduction 2why do you choose this program 3why are you qualified for admission 4career planning after graduation，感觉3你好像没怎么写
其实法国人让你写的英文版lettre de motivation你可以参考申请美国的academic cover letter，这个网上比较多，格式内容都可以参考这个

语言的问题帮你改了一下，内容结构只有你自己再考虑考虑了
lettre de motivation.doc (27 KB, 下载次数: 134)

2011-5-7 14:06:51 上传

下载次数: 134

蓝翎草UID: 3089459

keij 发表于 2011-5-7 14:06
1# 落雨蔷薇
感觉很多地方读起来都不是很地道
结构最好按照：1brief introduction 2why do you choose  ...

keij真是好人啊！
论坛就该多些你这样的前辈哦！！！