Issue52 (NO.2)花了偶两个小时啊!想增强自信的就进来看吧!!!

scannerUID: 140886

Issue52
Education encourages students to question and criticize, and therefore
does little to promote social harmony.
教育鼓励学生们提出问题和进行批判，这样做的结果无助于促进社会的和谐。


  The arguer asserted that owning curiosity and critical thinking skills, students will probably be an unstable factor of the society and therefore, disturb the harmony of it. However, I am with the belief that rather than deteriorating the harmony of the society, questioning and criticizing will definitely promote the social harmony.

  For the first thing, the importance of questioning and critical thinking should never be underestimated. Should the purpose of education be to ossify the students' mind? How can we imagine that been forbidden to ask questions, a student could be able to grow up from the original status. And further more, as a saying goes "To learn is to ask.", when the problems remains unsolved, students would undoubtedly be more confused by the further education, then, how could the education proceed? What can we expect from the immature students to participate in the society’s construction? Just imagine what the world would possibly be void of question and critic. The law of gravitation would never be discovered in that Newton never ask the reason why the apple fell onto his head rather than fly to the sky. Moreover, human beings would possibly be in the stage of escaping from being killed by predators if they still escape from fire without asking why not utilize it as a protective method for other animals scatter away in front of the fire. So, it should and must be the responsibility of the educators to encourage students to question as well to criticize for the sake of human development.

Secondly, our questions and critics function as a negative feedback to conciliate the problems and resentments already existing in the society, and will therefore eliminate the disharmony. Never will a integrate system be harmonious without interaction of its components, so is the systematical society. In the society, we need the voice of its members, since to question is to find the problem, and to criticize is to analyze the situation. These, are the prerequisites to solve the problems in order to promote social harmony. In contemporary society, the governments or political leaders are endeavoring promoting the democratic process by the way of liberating lots of once forbidden behaviors such as the freedom of speech. Once people are entitled to freely speak and to express their feelings as well to demand their rights, the government would be informed about what are the demands the of its people, what are the problems that encumbering the process of socialization; then, a sound project would responsively be established to meet the needs of its people and thus, the stability of the society could be expected. This, obviously, is the mysterious role that question and critic are playing as a negative feedback factor in conciliating the conflicts between the government and its citizens.

  However, one thing I have to point out is that critic is a double-edge sword, it could benefit the society in some aspect, but for other cases, overdoing will cause the society unstable. What the hypercritics always do is to exaggerate the situation, and if it is on the issues of politics or economy, then it would probably evoke a panic in the demos. For this consideration, we should resort to the strict censorship to prevent such irresponsible critics displayed on the TVs or appear on the to be published newspapers.

  In sum, in a society that calls for democracy, it is the responsibility of the educators to encourage students to question as well to criticize, through which not only the students would have a better understanding of the contemporary society, but also the society itself could be able to gain self-coordination.

sydUID: 151948

The arguer asserted that owning curiosity and critical thinking skills, students will probably be an unstable factor of the society and therefore, disturb the harmony of it. However, I am with the belief that rather than deteriorating the harmony of the society, questioning and criticizing will definitely promote the social harmony.[开头很不错啊，偶要借鉴]

For the first thing[感觉上改成IN THE FIRST PALACE 要好些], the importance of questioning and critical thinking should never be underestimated[题目没有说到低估，这里用MISUNDERSTOOD 要好些吧？]. Should the purpose of education be to ossify the students' mind? How can we imagine that been [BEING]forbidden to ask questions, a student could be able to grow up [from the original status][有些REDUNDANT]. And further more, as a saying goes "To learn is to ask.", when the problems remains unsolved, students would undoubtedly be more confused by the further education, then, how could the education proceed? What can we expect from the immature students [TO DO]to participate in the society’s construction? Just imagine what the world would possibly be [IN THE]void of question and critic. The law of gravitation would never be discovered in that Newton never ask[ASKED] the reason why the apple fell onto his head rather than fly [FLEW]to the sky. Moreover, human beings would possibly be in the stage of escaping from being killed by predators if they still escape from fire without asking why not utilize it as a protective method [for other animals scatter away in front of the fire].[TO KEEP AWY FROM OTHER ANIMALS] So, it should and must be the responsibility of the educators to encourage students to question as well to criticize for the sake of human development.[第一段的行文有些不那么FLUENT]

Secondly, our questions and critics function as a negative feedback to conciliate the problems and resentments already existing in the society, and will therefore eliminate the disharmony.[A GOOD POINT OF VIEW I THINK ] Never will a integrate [INTERGRATED]system be harmonious without interaction of its components, so is the[A，THE 指代不清] systematical society. In the [这里指代前文的 A SOCIETY]society, we need the voice of its members, since to question is to find the problem, and to criticize is to analyze the situation.[很好的排比结构] These, are the prerequisites to solve the problems in order to promote [THE]social harmony. In[ACCORDING TO 可以更好的联系上下文，我觉得] contemporary society, the governments or political leaders are endeavoring promoting the democratic process by the way of liberating lots of once forbidden behaviors such as the freedom of speech. Once people are entitled to freely speak[SPEAK FREELY] and to express their feelings as well to demand their rights, the government would be informed about what are the demands the of its people, [AND]what are the problems that encumbering the process of [socialization？]; then, a sound project would responsively be established to meet the needs of its people and thus, the stability of the society could be expected. This, obviously, is the mysterious role that question and critic are playing as a negative feedback factor in conciliating the conflicts between the government and its citizens.

However, one thing I have to point out is that critic is a double-edge sword, it could benefit the society in some aspect, but for other cases, overdoing will cause the society unstable. What the hypercritics always do is to exaggerate the situation, and if it is on the issues of politics or economy, then it would probably evoke a panic in the demos. For this consideration, we should resort to the strict censorship to prevent such irresponsible critics displayed on the TVs or appear on the to be published newspapers.[鉴于你的开头的鲜明立场，这一段最好舍弃，况且字数还是足够的；否则你要改一改开头的立场。]

In sum, in a society that calls for democracy[怎么转道民主来了？？？], it is the responsibility of the educators to encourage students to question as well to criticize, through which not only the students would have a better understanding of the contemporary society, but also the society itself could be able to gain self-coordination.

总体是不错的 :) 但是问题也不少。语法错误稍多了写，还有最后转道了“民主”，尽管和“和谐的社会”有联系。但是还是有偏题之嫌哦。
同为新手，有错误望谅解并指出。 :D

poohUID: 146994

8错，第三段写的好，例子比较恰当。但是我认为正文第一段如果在结束的时候回到质疑与社会和谐的关系，就使文章更紧凑，否则有点digress.

scannerUID: 140886

谢谢两位的赏脸~~~
TO SYD:
说实话,我也觉得正文第一段不是很流畅,论证组织的也很不好,SIGH...
各种语法错误也不少哈~~~~我的想法是在这里论述提问与批判对于学生乃至社会的重要性,它不应该被社会所摈弃
至于倒数第二段,我是想从方法论的角度来探讨偏激的评论对社会存在危害,但是可以通过严格的审查制度来避免，本来是希望使文章看起更严密,谁知弄巧成拙,反有点画蛇添足的味道~~~残念...
写到最后的时候兴奋加头晕,根本不晓得在干什么,就把民主弄上去了~~FAINT~~的确不怎么合适的说~~

TO POOH:
首先,你过奖了~~但我仍然很高兴你这样认为^_^
其次,有道理,再加句话就可以达到比较好的效果了
你的文章很8错的说,偶限于水平有限,不敢轻举妄动,哈哈~~~
以后还请多多指教,多多交流,哈!