issue144,吸取了这些天来帮我改作文的G友建议的新作

吭哧吭哧啃啃UID: 153580

issue144 It is the artist, not the critic who gives society something of lasting value.

The speaker contends that artists always give something of lasting worth on us, while the critics do not. I concede that lots of art in the past still has significant effect on individuals today. However, we should not ignore the perpetual history value of both artist and critics.

Admittedly, people always pay more attention on art, such as novel, music, film, painting, and so on, rather than critics work evaluating them at the time the art produced. The significant aspect of art is its contribution on our life for at least two reasons. On one hand, art enhance life by adding beauty to our surroundings. It can be illustrated by the paintings holding everywhere in our house, classroom and restaurants. On the other hand, good work of artist, symphonies, ballets, operas, for example, give most of us an aesthetic feeling, making us comfortable and pleasure. On the contrary, people always take the viewpoint that the sight of critics who were a long distance away from us was too short and the view too narrow to find the connotation of the works of arts. A case in point is the dismissal of the esteemed critics to Shakespeare because of his failure to conforming to neo-classical style of unity. When the individuals today heard about Voltaire's rejection of Shakespeare as barbaric, they may not take it seriously.

However, from the view of history, both artist and critics work help historian to find the culture of that time during which the work was produced. Art cannot be independent from society and characteristic social status he or she located in. First of all, art spawns from society, and it is the reflection of notion, values and trends at that time. For example, the American novel Gone with the wind, written by Margaret Mitchell, has gained much fame throughout the world for generations because it vividly recollects the history of the American Civil War. Secondly, art is the product of different social classes and a good work must serve them respectively in the artistic way. That, from a perspective, explains how we divide art works into the classics and the popular songs or folk songs.

The perpetual history value of critic composition lies on the vital role of critics. Critic who was familiar with a particular artist and his or her works witnessed the bloom and fruit of artist’s creation. Moreover, from the view of critic, we can know the mainstream ideology and the culture at that time. A case in point is the severity fustigate on symphony NO.7 of Beethoven, , which is the signature of the transition from classical to romantic composition to in his creative life. Hence, we can find that classicism, which is guided by force of Mozart and some other classicists, is more popular and can be widely accepted by contemporary musician and audience. Therefore, critic articles are also cherished by historian for its lasting historical worth on researching the surroundings and background why and how the special artist style came out.

In sum, when we marvel at the beauty and aesthetic value of art of the past, we should not despise the lasting value of art and critic’s work in historical perspective.


To莫名N，这一次我没有先看范文
TOcxqq2002，听了你的话，跟着感觉走。
TO银杏，语言在短期内可能提不了多少了，逻辑上是不是好一点了
TO jackyguass，不知道我的文章思路上可不可以

小豚UID: 154964

今天先去睡觉了，明天上来看看。

飘翎UID: 145870

首先是认识题目，critic:one who forms and expresses judgments of the merits, faults, value, or truth of a matter.因此我觉得不一定要从发现flaws这个角度，我看了几个猴哥的提纲，都是批评……
从我的理解你的文章应该是这样的结构：（不对请说……）
1。art的重要性，这里你用了比较的过程……，开头第一句话Admittedly, people always pay more attention on art, such as novel, music, film, painting, and so on, rather than critics work evaluating them at the time the art produced……
但是第一段并没有看出哪里优越……，也就是说，是偏见的比较……
2。第二段是However, from the view of history, both artist and critics work help historian to find the culture of that time during which the work was produced. Art cannot be independent from society and characteristic social status he or she located  in.从主题句上面看，你应该写两方面，一方面是artisit对历史的影响，另外一方面是critic work 对历史的影响，很不幸，从第二句话开始你就跑题了……，变成了art reveal the culture and otherwise hidden ideas 了，……

3。第三段是从critic的眼中我们能够看到art的东东，从而反映了历史，但是你的例子却没有证实critic的作用……，难道我们是critic?
所以，我觉得这个题目关键在于如何写好critic的作用……，比较令人郁闷，我们并不了解……
这个我写的也很郁闷，你看看我的作文觉得怎样？
我几乎羡慕这里所有人的文笔……，为什么只有我是小学生水平？555555~~~~

吭哧吭哧啃啃UID: 153580

谢谢,我晚上帮你改,我要上课去了
更郁闷
难道我的英语表达真有问题
BODY1,我从个人的角度分析现状,确实有重art 轻work of critic的
BODY2的第一句,对下两段的总括,说两者都有重要的历史价值
后面写ART的LASTING VALUE]
BODY3写CRITIST的VALUE

语言`````,呵呵,第一个不打击我的就是你,谢了

jackygaussUID: 147842

读了几篇144，现在感觉有必要先对“something of lasting value"进行一下定义。根据这个定义的范畴不同，进行不同的文章布局。比如，我的那一篇，就要说清楚为什么是artist以及为什么不是critics；对你这一篇，根据你的隐含的定义（历史上的价值性），应该是论述两者分别有何重要的lasting value。而你的结构应该说也做到了这一点。我觉得ok啊！但有些细节还要修改，正如楼上几位所说。
我的电脑上不了网了，郁闷！只好跑到隔壁来上了，不便于详细地改了，不好意思啊！下次一定补回来，呵呵。：）祝考试取得好成绩！

吭哧吭哧啃啃UID: 153580

读了几篇144，现在感觉有必要先对“something of lasting value"进行一下定义

我刚才也去坛子里看了看,很有启发,这里真是块宝地 啊


同志们有空再帮我该改改