10月26日托福，每天一篇作文，求修改指点~

daphnezxyUID: 3567414

作文是我的心病，从今天开始，至考试之前，每天一篇，希望大家能帮我修改，谢谢。
今天题目是：some students prefer independence while some prefer living with parents for a longer time, which do you prefer and why？
字数：（423），这个字数很差，没办法，昨天写的才350，希望到考试前能提高到500把。
以下是拙作：
   Like birds flying away from nests, human are also supposed to live an independent life when they become adults. Independence, an essential tool to keep one survive in this society, is an indispensible ability that everyone should learn. In my point of view, I prefer to live an independent life from my parents instead of clinging to parents for too long, for the following two reasons I would elaborated upon.
    Students who get independence from parents earlier are much more matured and sophisticated compared to those who spend most of their time at home with parents. Obviously, for students who live alone, they have to handle problems personally, such as cooking, washing clothes, renting houses and so forth, due to their lack parents help and guidance, which, however, makes them more tough and stronger. When I was in high school, I chose to live in the school’s dormitory while most of my peers tend to stay at home. The day I entered the dormitory, I was mocked by my roommates as I was kind of spoiled by my parents, since had no idea how to wash my dishes and stockings. However, after persistence practice, I was capable of handling quite a lot of problems, and I even bought an air conditioner and installed it in our dormitory. After my three years’ independent life in high school, I turned to be a confident girl as I can always handle difficult problems, while many of my peers are under the shield of their parents. Independence plays a crucial role in a people’s life, as not every chance you are lucky enough to resort to someone for help. Someday, we have to overcome obstacles by ourselves, though we may be sweaty, we shall be
     In addition, for young people, living in an environment without parents’ surveillance is much more easier to make new friends. When living at home with parents, there might be numerous restrains that forbid you to make friends, such as curfew. However, if students are independent from parents, such as renting a room near the school or living in the dormitory, they seem to make more friends, since they have more choices and time.
     To conclusion, as it requires a tough heart and a steady mind, it is never easy to be independent, however, it is worthy and priceless to gain independence. Just like siblings will never be nourished into towering trees under the shadow of other trees, young students will never be genuinely grow-ups under the protection of their parents.

daphnezxyUID: 3567414

刚刚发现了一个错误的词语，小树苗应该是sapling，我写成了sibling