issue55 打井新写法？ 这个狠掐！！

yifengUID: 159612

呵呵
给你个建议吧，不知道合不合理。
有例子就尽量用，没有也编一下。
有时编一些数字，要有出处，数字最好是奇数（不像假的）
引用名言，可以编呀，只要人物有名就可以。
呵呵，我说的实战时或许用的上，平时最好用真的。
过几天我发一些例子过来，参考一下吧。
或许是后天，明天没空

PhoebuswangUID: 158473

------正文------
In modern times, there is a debate concerning that whether the competition for high grades limits the quality of education. The speaker claims that such a competition seriously dilute the quality of learning at all levels of education. As far as I am concerned, however, students do benefit the necessary competition for high score, meanwhile, it is harmful for one to pursue high grades blindly.(呵呵，机井似开头）

On the one hand, there lies a necessity of competition for high grades in schools in that this sort of competition is the impetus for students to do well in their learning. For one thing, high score, an actual and significant symbol of top students, stands for the statuses of one's learning level and something more important, that is one's （直接用横线代替）confidence. Although, the merely score is not the only judgment of one's strength, it is truly an objective and efficient method to evaluate a student. And such a method is widely used from China mainland to the American continent. So as to say, students pursue high score due to the fact that grades do offer them convincing evidence（a standard to judge) concerning their payment on learning. For another thing, a school report with higher grades is more convincing and useful when graduates seek for jobs in the society(这句话有点没有道理的了）。 Undoubtedly, every company would like to hire better ones than those whose school report is poor and abject since it is granted that high-scored students are better students, though it is always not the case. To be brief, it is indispensable for students to compete for high score.

On the other hand, to pursue high score blindly though a competition way probably hamper the rounded development of students and influence the quality of education as a result. As is known to all, cheating, an action without morality and honesty appears at most of school all too often. Why can not avoid such a bad manner at schools? One of the main reasons is that students have so strong desire for high grades that they would gain this goal by fair means of foul.（作弊往往是为了一个合格的分数而不是高分） What's more, cheating is an easier way to achieve such a goal since it is very efficient and available to some extent and also easily to operate（？？？？？）. A survey about cheating was made by a teacher in some classes of a university. The result shows that even more than a half of students acknowledged that they had cheating actions before or had a tendency to do so. It illustrates that such a competition probably goes through a wrong way and leads students to form a habit of cheat. Moreover, a drastic and malformed competition maybe demolishes the comity between students. If students have hate against（去掉） each other, what situation it would turn to be at schools!

Accordingly, a proper and moderate competition for scores is required. To form a fraternal and honest atmosphere st schools, would enhance the quality of education in that students would like work hard to gain a better achievement and such hard working would supercede cheating or any other so-called shortcuts. At the same time, educators and schools should pay more attention on developing students' rounded capability than encouraging students to compete only to find that what they really mastered is the skill of taking tests and gaining high grades ultimately. In a word, in some sense, schools may send lots of test takers into the society rather than the true persons with ability.（最后一句多余）

In conclusion, whether the competition to gain high grades is harmful or beneficial depends upon the extent and ways of it. Students as well as educators ought to make a consideration about the moderation of competitions in order to let it be more valuable and useful but little defects.(620)

结构比较清楚，例子平平，语言还有待改进

lovebrianUID: 157127

感谢!!
sniper兄~~~，插入语还是多？再改~~~  btw心头像不错嘛！
fishergirl 不是把~~我的语言还简练？
yifeng 谢谢你的建议~~很好的！
Phoebuswang 多谢~~

fishergirlUID: 152325

比我的那些个绕来绕去的话要好多了。

昨天还受到了偶GG的批评，说我陷入了一个怪圈－－句子喜欢复杂，词语喜欢生僻，汗……

lovebrianUID: 157127

都有GG当助教？？！God~~~~~

我想用生僻词写的时候还想不起来呢~~~~~~嘿嘿

fishergirlUID: 152325

唉，一般我使用生僻词语的后果就是：祖国河山一片红！