猜cc的个人作品集

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八月份跟着老师写了一些作文，九月上旬因为考托福就荒废了，现在又回来啦。10.13考G，打算修改以前写的大纲，然后写全文，修改过程中的一些心得体会也会附上，欢迎大家来撩呀。

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主题帖：https://bbs.gter.net/thread-2111389-1-1.html
我的文章：https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mo ... age=1#pid1781399224

09)Some people believe that scientific discoveries have given us a much better understanding of the world around us. Others believe that science has revealed to us that the world is infinitely more complex than we ever realized.

Write a response in which you discuss which view more closely aligns with your own position and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should address both of the views presented.

旧提纲：

基本观点是科学可以让普通人更好地认识世界，采用的是分类法，将科学分为社会科学、自然科学和总体的科学思维。社会科学里的理论会让大众更好地认识社会的运作逻辑，自然科学里的理论则通过激发新的发明比如印刷机互联网，给普通人更多机会去获得知识，总体的科学思维则鼓励大众运用自己的理智去获取知识。
开头段全文：
Science was born in the Enlightenment movement in the eighteenth centuries with the premise that there are general laws in the nature and society and by proper and rational method we could discover them. We can’t estimate how much the world has been changed by it since then. We can tell from endless technological inventions that people seems to be unable to live without it. It’s already been a dominating way of thinking nowadays. And in my opinion, it can definitely foster a better understanding of the world for most ordinary people by disseminating its discoveries about patterns of the historical and social development; and also by applying its discoveries into reality. More importantly, science encourages people to think on themselves rather than depending on other authorities to get knowledge.

TP1：Firstly, the discoveries in social sciences can help people understand better how the society structures and operates. Karl Marx’s theory about class struggle has been a classical model in social sciences. It discusses how the dominant class rules and exploits other classes. Sigmund Freud found out the basic laws about how our experience formulates our in our adulthood. Pierre Bourdieu analyzes how the distinction forms between different groups of people.

TP2：While in natural sciences, those discoveries may seem rather abstruse for ordinary people. But the application of those discoveries will definitely facilitate our view about the world. For example, the printing has enlarges the bound of literacy to the bottom classes. The Internet provides an opportunity for those who can’t afford to go to school to teach themselves.

TP3：Besides these laws and technology developments, science also brings about a new way of thinking. Science broke the monopoly of knowledge by the church and freed every person from the rein from the religion and other superstition. It calls upon people to get knowledge by proficient proof and sound judgments. Scientists never proclaim that the discoveries they found are the truth. Rather, they assume that every theory is questionable and is thus open to criticisms.

因为题目要求对两个论点都要讨论，所以我又加了一段，论述第二个论点的适用范围：
However, as for genius, who bears much more knowledge and have sharper sense than ordinary people, science may offer them a different scene. to take Einstein as an example, the further and deeper he went in the scientific field, the better he knew about the boundary of science. What he saw more was those problems science can’t explain and those infinite fields that goes beyond human knowledge.

新题纲：
我的观点是科学能促进普通人对世界的理解，因为科学产生了更多更可靠的知识供普通人学习，给普通人更多渠道去学习和了解知识，同时科学所带来的知识爆炸使得普通人不得不去甄别知识，由此培养了他们的批判意识，这些都使得普通人可以更好地了解身处的世界。
开头段全文：
Our world has been fundamentally changed since the birth of modern science in the 18th century. There is probably no doubt about the influence of science on our society. Anybody can name some impacts, like it sets up a new academic standard or it fastens the advancement of technology, etc. However, when it comes to whether it enhances people’s understanding of the world, views may vary from each other. In my opinion, it can definitely foster a better understanding of the world for most ordinary people by offering people more reliable knowledge, ensuring better access to knowledge and also encouraging people to judge these knowledge independently.

TS1：Firstly, through the establishment of a totally new academic standard, which put an emphasis on the freedom of thought and the objectiveness of judgment, science has provided the commons a vaster range of reliable knowledge.
a. In the middle century, Knowledge production was fettered by religious belief. E.g. Copernicus was sentenced to death because of he proposed the heliocentric theory which goes against the pervasive theory supported by the religion.
b. Modern science: the method(experiment, replicable); the results(publishing system, peer review, open to doubt and criticism)


TS2：Besides, with the application of science discoveries into reality, science has also made it easier for the masses to acquire knowledge.
e.g. a. the printing press has enlarged the bound of literacy to the bottom classes. (Newspaper and magzine)
b. TV program
c. The Internet provides an opportunity for those who can’t afford to go to school to teach themselves.(distant courses national or international, TED)

TS3: More importantly, easier access to an unprecedentedly large amount of knowledge urges the public to cultivate their critical thinking, which will thus foster a more profound comprehension of the world.
这一段想不到例子，打算纯说理了。
It’s really common for us to confront two totally contradictive points of view, both partly convincing.
So, it calls upon people to discern good information from bad by checking the premise and logical procedure of every claim carefully.

因为题目要求对两个论点都要讨论，所以最后总结段加一个让步：
However, as for genius, who bears much more knowledge and have sharper sense than ordinary people, science may offer them a different scene. to take Einstein as an example, the further and deeper he went in the scientific field, the better he knew about the boundary of science. What he saw more was those problems science can’t explain and those infinite fields that goes beyond human knowledge.

总结：
修改提纲的过程中我发现分类法存在的一些问题，就是每段的TS容易变成举例子，而没有真正的观点，在我后面的一些文章中也存在这个问题。而且分类法尤其要注意三个TS分类的层次是否一致，以及不同类别是不是互斥的。
比如我的旧提纲中基本的观点是科学可以让普通人更好地了解身处的世界，采用的是分类的方法，将科学分为自然科学，社会科学，和总体的科学思维。首先这个分类标准就变化了，前两个是具体的层次，后一个是抽象的层次。如果确实要这样写的话，首段应该要指出，但是我旧提纲里并没有这样做。其次，我的三个TS分别为社会科学里的理论会让大众更好地认识社会的运作逻辑，自然科学里的理论则通过激发新的发明比如印刷机互联网，给普通人更多机会去获得知识，总体的科学思维则鼓励大众运用自己的理智去获取知识。虽然总体也算是没跑题，但总觉得统合连贯没那么好。而且我总的观点是科学对普通人的好处，但是后来我仔细考虑了，第一个TS中我举的例子，比如马克思的理论，其实不能算是科学，更多是哲学。其次，我单讲了这些理论论述了什么，并没有讲他们是怎么提高普通人对世界的认识的，比如普通人是怎么获得这些知识的。
在新提纲中，我的观点是科学能促进普通人对世界的理解，我的三个TS分别为：科学产生了更多更可靠的知识供普通人学习；给普通人更多渠道去学习和了解知识；同时科学所带来的知识爆炸使得普通人不得不去甄别知识，由此培养了他们的批判意识，这些都使得普通人可以更好地了解身处的世界。总体比旧提纲流畅，也要更加紧扣主题。

猜ccUID: 3828818

发现一个写issue避免跑题的办法，分享给大家。issue有一类题是讲两个因素之间的因果关系，也就是王老师说的关键词，一般是A—>B，审题过程中抓住A和B两个关键要素，其次确定是积极影响还是消极影响，因为我们需要在第一段亮明观点，而之后构思分论点的过程其实就是找到A影响B的过程和方式。需要注意的是，按照王老师的分论点构思法，第一种构思方式提出新的概念其实是给A下定义的过程，第二种分类法是探讨A的不同类别是怎么影响B的，第三种是探讨不同情境和条件，也就是A影响B的条件和情境。我自己的构思方式通常是找到一些中间要素C，D，E，因为A通常需要借助中间要素发挥影响，这可能有点像王老师的第一种提出新的概念。但不管何种构思，在中心句和主题句中要不断回应A和B。
比如我楼上的这篇文章，题目是Some people believe that scientific discoveries have given us a much better understanding of the world around us. Others believe that science has revealed to us that the world is infinitely more complex than we ever realized.
这里的要素A和B分别是science—> understanding about the world，中间的过程按照个人的理解可能是promote或hinder，拿我自己的文章来说，我的观点是science对understanding会有积极的影响。然后我找到了三个中间要素：提供给公众更可靠的知识（通过新的学术体制）；更容易便捷的获取知识的方式（通过科技发明）；和培养民众的批判意识，来解释A对B的积极影响。
通过这样的方式，一些具有迷惑性的题目也不容易跑题，比如这道
Scandals are useful because they focus our attention on problems in ways that no speaker or reformer ever could.
我第一次写的时候，没有用前述方法，我赞同题目的观点，想到了两个分论点，分别是1.丑闻能最大程度地吸引观众的注意力，从而激发关于这一问题的讨论。2. 丑闻通常会激发对于相关领域的调查，从而让人发现其他领域存在但还未引起重视的问题。
但后来我再仔细看，发现这个构思方式是跑题了的。题目要我们解释的是丑闻吸引公众的原因和方式，而我一直强调丑闻可以吸引公众注意。这道题用前述AB要素法来审题的话，就是scandal—>more attention，而我们要探讨的就是中间这个过程是怎么做到的。所以如果同意题目的话，正确的打开方式是不是这样：1.丑闻可以满足人性中对于隐私的窥探。2.丑闻让公众觉得他们于名人是平等的。3. 丑闻涉及的通常是性、暴力和金钱这些人类永恒的欲望，所以人们会更感兴趣。
以上，一点小思考，希望能够帮助到大家，有其他观点的也欢迎讨论。

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