[急求帮助，不胜感激]请朋友们帮我看看这篇ARGU，20号就考了

prairieUID: 188930

180.The following is a recommendation from the personnel director to the president of Acme Publishing Company.
"Many other companies have recently stated that having their employees take the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course has greatly improved productivity. One graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours; another graduate
rose from an assistant manager to vice president of the company in under a year. Obviously, the faster you can read, the more information you can absorb in a single workday. Moreover, Easy Read costs only $500 per employee-a small price to pay when you
consider the benefits to Acme. Included in this fee is a three-week seminar in Spruce City and a lifelong subscription to the Easy Read newsletter. Clearly, Acme would benefit greatly by requiring all of our employees to take the Easy Read course."
很多其他公司最近指出他们的员工参加了Easy Read的速读课程之后生产效率显著提高。这个课程的一名毕业生能够在两个小时之内读完长达500页的报告，另一名毕业生在一年内从助理经理上升到了副总裁。显然，你的阅读速度越快，在一天之内所能吸收的信息就越多。而且，Easy
Read的学费只有每人500元，当考虑到它给Acme带来的效益的时候这就是个小数目。这个费用包括在Spruce
City举行的为期三周的研讨会和Easy Read新闻刊物的终生赠阅。显然，Acme通过要求所有员工参加Easy Read的课程将会极大地受益。


    The arguer asserts that the president of Acme Publishing Company should encourage his employees to take the reading course of the Easy Read Apeed-Reading, since the course will benefit the company a lot. This recommendation is based on various respects. First he mentioned many other companies have recently stated that their productivity has been greatly improved after having their employees taking the Easy Read Apeed-Reading course. This statement relays on the fact that one graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours, while another graduate rose from an assistant manager to vice president of the company in under a year. He consequently arrives at the conclusion that the faster one can read, the more information one can absorb in a single workday. Moreover, the arguer point out that the $500  cost of the course including a three-week seminar in Spruce City and a life long subscription to the Easy Read newsletter is a small price for the company to pay considering the benefit to it.

    At first glace, the argument is somewhat reasonable. After an attentive investigation of it, I find the assumption of the argument ungrounded, since there are several fallacies that the arguer commits.

    First of all, the arguer fail to provide sufficient evidence to convince that the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course exactly improve people's reading rates. The arguer mentioned that one graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours. However, one single person is not able to represent most persons taking the course. Also, the arguer fail to prove that this graduate can also absorb the knowledge effectively while keeping such a record. In addition, it is likely that the graduate rose from an assistant manager to vice president no matter he took the course or not, since the arguer does not provide evidence to reassure the correlation of this course and a rise of position. As a consequence, unless more survey is done and more examples are given, the arguer cannot reach his conclusion that the course is definitely effective in improving people's reading ability.

    Secondly, the improvement of reading speed possibly has little validity since the arguer neglect to make enough investigation. It is stated in the argument that many other companies have greatly improved productivity after having the employees taking the course. However, there is no other convincing evidence to support this statement. Maybe the employees have taken other courses. Maybe these companies have recently increased the salary of their employees. Until these possibilities are excluded, conclusion could not be easily drawn. Moreover, the improvement of the productivity requires numerous other factors like the efficiency and proficiency in working, the technical investment, etc. It is essential for the arguer to make sure that the high reading ability does profit the company.

    Additionally, $500 is not such a small price as the arguer claims. There are many courses that are likely to function in improving employee’s ability. The same amount of money could be spent on other more important courses if the arguer could not prove that the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course can actually profit the company by enhancing people's ability in reading.

    In sum, the argument lacks credibility to confirm the genuine benefit for the company by sending its employees to attend the course. If he expected to make his presumption more authentic, he would have to provide sufficient clues to convince that the course does improve people’s reading ability, including the rate and efficiency. Again, the arguer ought to confirm that the improvement of reading ability will profit the productivity of the company. At last, enough investigation and survey should be made to prove that the amount of $500 is worth the price.

xiaoheUID: 162707

不太明白。你想要别人帮你做什么？

不怕开水烫的猪UID: 187893

觉得第一段太长了

估计ETS的评语肯定会出现"hesitate"这个词的

flyingwindUID: 189320

呵呵，第1段又臭又长啊，可以完全cancel
表骂我哈，开个玩笑

hulalaUID: 169776

我也20号考，不过，你写的论点太多了啊，提三个就好了，个人意见。而且你的大字速度也真是惊人啊。我最多30分钟400字的样子阿。

happymichelleUID: 154082

180.The following is a recommendation from the personnel director to the president of Acme Publishing Company.
"Many other companies have recently stated that having their employees take the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course has greatly improved productivity. One graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours;another graduate rose from an assistant manager to vice president of the company in under a year. Obviously, the faster you can read, the more information you can absorb in a single workday. Moreover, Easy Read costs only $500 per employee-a small price to pay when you consider the benefits to Acme. Included in this fee is a three-week seminar in Spruce City and a lifelong subscription to the Easy Read newsletter. Clearly, Acme would benefit greatly by requiring all of our employees to take the Easy Read course."
很多其他公司最近指出他们的员工参加了Easy Read的速读课程之后生产效率显著提高。这个课程的一名毕业生能够在两个小时之内读完长达500页的报告，另一名毕业生在一年内从助理经理上升到了副总裁。显然，你的阅读速度越快，在一天之内所能吸收的信息就越多。而且，Easy
Read的学费只有每人500元，当考虑到它给Acme带来的效益的时候这就是个小数目。这个费用包括在Spruce
City举行的为期三周的研讨会和Easy Read新闻刊物的终生赠阅。显然，Acme通过要求所有员工参加Easy Read的课程将会极大地受益。


The arguer asserts that the president of Acme Publishing Company should encourage his employees to take the reading course of the Easy Read Apeed-Reading, since the course will benefit the company a lot. This recommendation is based on various respects. First he mentioned many other companies have recently stated that their productivity has been greatly improved after having their employees taking the Easy Read Apeed-Reading course. This statement relays on the fact that one graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours, while another graduate rose from an assistant manager to vice president of the company in under a year. He consequently arrives at the conclusion that the faster one can read, the more information one can absorb in a single workday. Moreover, the arguer point out that the $500 cost of the course including a three-week seminar in Spruce City and a life long subscription to the Easy Read newsletter is a small price for the company to pay considering the benefit to it.（开头过于冗赘了，重点应该是如何反驳，而不是罗列作者的观点和evidence）

At first glace, the argument is somewhat reasonable. After an attentive investigation of it, I find the assumption of the argument ungrounded, since there are several fallacies that the arguer commits.(感觉上从这里才开始真正开始)

First of all, the arguer fail to provide sufficient evidence to convince that the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course exactly improve people's reading rates. The arguer mentioned that one graduate of the course was able to read a five-hundred-page report in only two hours. However, one single person is not able to represent most persons taking the course. Also, the arguer fail to prove that this graduate can also absorb the knowledge effectively while keeping such a record. In addition, it is likely that the graduate rose from an assistant manager to vice president no matter he took the course or not, since the arguer does not provide evidence to reassure the correlation of this course and a rise of position. As a consequence, unless more survey is done and more examples are given, the arguer cannot reach his conclusion that the course is definitely effective in improving people's reading ability.（这段论证不错）

Secondly, the improvement of reading speed possibly has little validity since the arguer neglect to make enough investigation. It is stated in the argument that many other companies have greatly improved productivity after having the employees taking the course. However, there is no other convincing evidence to support this statement. Maybe the employees have taken other courses. Maybe these companies have recently increased the salary of their employees. Until these possibilities are excluded, conclusion could not be easily drawn. Moreover, the improvement of the productivity requires numerous other factors like the efficiency and proficiency in working, the technical investment, etc. It is essential for the arguer to make sure that the high reading ability does profit the company.

Additionally, $500 is not such a small price as the arguer claims. There are many courses that are likely to function in improving employee’s ability. The same amount of money could be spent on other more important courses if the arguer could not prove that the Easy Read Speed-Reading Course can actually profit the company by enhancing people's ability in reading.（这段感觉没有展开，说$500不是小数目，是否合算，因为没有同行业别的培训的价格比较。。。）
感觉上还应该来一段，在挑个别的错误，比如他的结论中by requiring all…注意这个all 是不是能够反驳一下，有没有必要都参加？每个员工的业务范畴都不一样，且有些人已经很优秀了没有必要培训？

In sum, the argument lacks credibility to confirm the genuine benefit for the company by sending its employees to attend the course. If he expected to make his presumption more authentic, he would have to provide sufficient clues to convince that the course does improve people’s reading ability, including the rate and efficiency. Again, the arguer ought to confirm that the improvement of reading ability will profit the productivity of the company. At last, enough investigation and survey should be made to prove that the amount of $500 is worth the price.
感觉语言还不错，问题在结构上，重点应该放在body上，而不是开头和结尾
个人意见，仅供参考;p
不过搂主30min写这么多字，牛啊~

imongUID: 140258

Michelle MM好久不见
有空多来指导 :D

ZHGsunnyUID: 185312

嗯，我也感觉开头太罗嗦了。是不是可以把第二段加点内容作为开头呢？同意happymichelle的观点，正文段的最后一段论证不够充分，使人有时间不够草草收兵的感觉，我觉得应该把开头段的时间省下来用在正文段的展开上的。

bluelegend66UID: 161638

开头就直接点问题进入~~了
模板可以在润色一下~每段开头
关于论点的话四个也无所谓
但这四个最好是让步的切入~~平行的话最好模板开头在改改