Issue120 第4篇 砖头来吧！

ryanqUID: 154025

So much is new and complex today that looking back for an understanding of the past provides little guidance for living in the present.

syllabus :p :
1.历史对一些新问题确实没有指导意义：clone, 病毒
2.但人的本性不变，所以有一些问题可从历史中得到启发。
3.历史给了我们经验教训。
4.有些问题是历史遗留下来的，必须追本溯源。


------正文------
The writer claims that contemporary world is full of complexity and new problems that people have never faced before thus studying the past is meaningless in directing today's society. I concede that some problems never appeared before in history. However, in other ways retrospections to the past are still necessary in guiding our living .

Admittedly, nowadays' society shifts at a high speed and it changes more complex making us face more and more new problems everyday. In the field of biology, cloning human is under hot discussion. Though many countries set laws concerning this matter for human ethics, undeniably this kind of researches still exists in parts of the world. Another example is the unsafety of private information on Internet. Virus, Trojan, who knows what is the next may cause you computer crash down once more. We are in front of an unknown world to some extent.

However, some of the social problems confusing us now are universal and timeless ones in history. These sorts of problems spring mostly from the failings and foibles that are part-and-parcel of human nature. Our problems involving interpersonal relationships with people of the opposite sexes stem from basic differences between men and women. Social problems of racial or national discrimination are resulted from the fear and mistrust of people who are different from us. War and crime stem from the male aggressive instinct and the innate desire for power. These problems have not changed since ancient time. So looking back for these problems in history can make us better understand what we are facing now.   

Moreover, through learning the past, we can also gain experiences of our ancestors. Most of these experiences are reference, precaution and teaching. Take Yellow River for example, hundreds years ago in China, the upriver was a forest. Due to over-falling, this forest disappeared, leaving only yellow ground there. The increasing amount of sand slides into the river not only turning this Chinese mother river's color but also resulting in flooding continuing for centuries. This disaster warns that we should care for the global environment during developing the society.  

Last but not the least, it's necessary to understand the past for some events comes from the past which is still unsolved. Learning the past contributes to further understanding and easier  to familiar contemporary situation. Consider the Middle East problem. The difficulty of solving the problem lies in the confliction of religions in the history of Israel and Palestine together with a series of war and assassination. Without an understanding of the past, no effective solutions can be found.      

To sum up, though there are new problems to face, the basic human nature has not changed. An understanding of the past can benefits many aspects of our contemporary life, because today comes from yesterday.

poohUID: 146994

So much is new and complex today that looking back for an understanding of the past provides little guidance for living in the present.

syllabus  :
1.历史对一些新问题确实没有指导意义：clone, 病毒
2.但人的本性不变，所以有一些问题可从历史中得到启发。
3.历史给了我们经验教训。
4.有些问题是历史遗留下来的，必须追本溯源。


------正文------
The writer claims that contemporary world is full of complexity and new problems that people have never faced before thus studying the past is meaningless in directing today's societydirect today's society???听着像独裁政府，--> studying the past is meaningless to people  living in contemporary society.  . I concede that some problems never appeared before in history. 你这里只说了问题的new, 每涉及题目里面说的complex However, in other ways in other ways??用另一种方式？？应该是从另一个角度看问题吧，这里表达不对啊。--> from other perspectives, retrospections to the past are still necessary in guiding our living in the present没把话说完啊  .

开头可以的，表明了立场，但是没说明原因，你为什么得出结论说 retrospections to the past are still necessary in guiding our living，开头简单给出原因最好。
开头大众化了点，可能是因为时间限制的原因吧。其实完全可以把开头写的吸引人一点。
e.g.
History refers to the things happened in the past. Believe it or not, although we live in contemporary world, we often look backward to pick up experience, methods and to picuture the present issues. It is like a database, where we look up data and carry out daily life.  But history is the frozen things left in the past, whereas our daily life is changing faster and transforming to be more complex. Considering both sides, I .....给出你的结论



Admittedly, nowadays' society shifts shift 更多指位置的移动，还使用transform好 at a high speed and it changes more complex changes to be more complex making us face more and more new problems everyday. In the field of biology, cloning human is under hot discussion. Though many countries set laws concerning this matter for human ethics, undeniably this kind of researchesresearch不可数 still exists in parts of the world. set laws也没说不允许啊，怎么出来后面这句话这个例子你还没说完呢，怎么这么快就来另一个了？！ 你还没说我们面对什么样的问题呢？是道德上的问题？还是什么问题？Another example is the unsafety of private information on Internet. Virus, Trojan, who knows what is the next may cause you computer crash down once more. 这是个句子吗？是个带从句的短语？ We are in front of an unknown world to some extent. 你只举例子却没有分析，你要说明这些问题的复杂性和前所未有性！

However, some of the social problems confusing us now are universal and timeless ones in history.作为TC，这句话你最好说的完整协，后面加个原因状语从句 These sorts of problems spring mostly from the failings and foibles that are part-and-parcel of human nature. Our problems involving interpersonal relationships with people of the opposite sexes stem from basic differences between men and women. Social problems of racial or national discrimination are resulted from the fear and mistrust of people who are different from us. War and crime stem from the male aggressive instinct and the innate desire for power. These problems have not changed since ancient time. So looking back for these problems in history can make us better understand what we are facing now.

Moreover, through learning the past, we can also gain experiences of our ancestors. Most of these experiences are reference, precaution and teaching. Take Yellow River for example, hundreds years ago in China, the upriver was a forest. Due to over-falling, this forest disappeared, leaving only yellow ground there. The increasing amount of sand slides into the river not only turning this Chinese mother river's color but also resulting in flooding continuing for centuries. This disaster warns that we should care for the global environment during developing the society.

Last but not the least, it's necessary to understand the past for some events comes from the past which is still unsolved. Learning the past contributes to further understanding and easier to familiar contemporary situation. Consider the Middle East problem. The difficulty of solving the problem lies in the confliction of religions in the history of Israel and Palestine together with a series of war and assassination. Without an understanding of the past, no effective solutions can be found.

To sum up, though there are new problems to face, the basic human nature has not changed. An understanding of the past can benefits many aspects of our contemporary life, because today comes from yesterday.

重点看了前面，发现你每段都深入不下去，对例子的分析不够，另外最好写三个body,每个里面要是有分论最好，这样才感觉有力度。

总的来说，还是掌握了基本的写法，写的再丰富些会更好的。

加油！谢谢你积极修改别人的文章！keep on!

ryanqUID: 154025

......晕，这么好的机会.....还没看到论证的主体就被否了。

其实我本意是大反+小部分可定的，也许+B2放到-B2能好一些。

谢谢斑竹啊，俺会继续努力地

acropolisUID: 159777

段落之间的逻辑太vague

poohUID: 146994

ryanq, 你这样写可以，我是说你整篇文章分析的都不深入。


楼上的，看到你冒泡了，:D