issue15,请批评一下！

wildUID: 189262

Issue15  第6篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：45分1秒     536 words
从2005年1月26日20时29分到2005年1月26日21时45分
------题目------
The stability of a society depends on how it responds to the extremes of human behavior.
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How a society responds to the extremes of human behavior decide whether it can go well with stability. This is an abstract way of talking about one thing. At first place, we need to explain what "the society's responds to the extremes of human behavior" means. If we identify this as the rules and actions like what law operates. Such an opinion is reasonable to some extent, but at the same time, partial.

We can not deny that law is a powerful method to control human behaviors and warrant the stability of a society. Extreme behaviors are no doubt harmful to the society. The event of 911 is a typical deed produced by the terrors, how many people died or injured, how many people lose their families! Even other people were living in fear, and the security of the country is under doubt at that time. Such things strongly influence the society's stability. In this situation, how the government looks about and deals with it are of course very important. Without the government's strong attack to the terrors, citizens can not feel safe, and the stability of the society can not be guaranteed. This is an extreme example in the cases held by laws. Even concerning other illegal deeds in our daily lives, laws, which present what the government will do with extreme behaviors of human, play an crucial role to maintain the stability of the society.  

However, not one government that can do well with people's wrong deeds will certainly maintain the stability of its society. Because law can only by the punishment and overawing on people to constrain human's response in the instance conditions. But can not guarantee the most citizens’ security at any time and for the long run, if so, the law will also lose the meaning of its existence. What ultimately lead man's behavior is whose mind and virtue. So another important thing one success government have to do well is the education. Only education can form the think in people's minds and sense in people's hearts, and only these intrinsic things are the things with the strongest power. So that, in order to warrant the stability of the society, educating people to do right deeds is the root way.

From another and the entire point of view, for every society economy is the foundation to any other upward buildings, economy is also the foundation of one society's stability. It is difficult to imagine a society filled with people who can not stuff their stomach with bread and water can run smoothly. Only after people can eat and cloth well, they can devote themselves to the contribution of the industry, science and arts. When people can get satisfying lives, they will not to think about extreme deeds. After all, the terrors need to sacrifice a lot for what they deed, so if they can lead a life in their dreams, they will not need to run risks. Therefore continued development of the economy is a basic and inevitable factor for a steady-going society. Without the prosperity of economy, one society can not get long, not to say stability.

In a word, how one government deal with illegal and extreme deeds really puts great influence on the stability of its society, but only this is far from enough. After all, people’s id can not be totally controlled by any rules and laws, even can not be well constrained by the person himself/herself. Adding that, the stability of one society is a synthetical result of education, economy, religions ethic and so on, besides the response to extreme behaviors. Therefore only attribute the stability of the society to one aspect is partial and arbitrary. To construct a stable society, many other factors need to be considered and well done.

指向大海UID: 158737

How a society responds to the extremes of human behavior decide whether it can go well with stability. This is an abstract way of talking about one thing. At first place, we need to explain what "the society's responds to the extremes of human behavior" means. If we identify this as the rules and actions like what law operates. Such an opinion is reasonable to some extent, but at the same time, partial.

We can not deny that law is a powerful method to control human behaviors and warrant the stability of a society. Extreme behaviors are no doubt harmful to the society. The event of 911 is a typical deed produced by the terrors, how many people died or injured, how many people lose their families! Even other people were living in fear, and the security of the country is under doubt at that time. Such things strongly influence the society's stability. In this situation, how the government looks about and deals with it are of course very important. Without the government's strong attack to the terrors, citizens can not feel safe, and the stability of the society can not be guaranteed.例子不错但是是政府领导人的作用不是法律我觉得主题句需要改 This is an extreme example in the cases held by laws. Even concerning other illegal deeds in our daily lives, laws, which present what the government will do with extreme behaviors of human, play an crucial role to maintain the stability of the society.

However, not one government that can do well with people's wrong deeds will certainly maintain the stability of its society. Because law can only by the punishment and overawing on people to constrain human's response in the instance conditions. But can not guarantee the most citizens’ security at any time and for the long run, if so, the law will also lose the meaning of its existence. What ultimately lead man's behavior is whose mind and virtue. So another important thing one success government have to do well is the education. Only education can form the thinkthinking in people's minds and sense in people's hearts, and only these intrinsic things are the things with the strongest power. So that有这用法么？, in order to warrant the stability of the society, educating people to do right deeds is the root way. 这段不错，但主题句似乎绕了，后面一步一步讲是中式思维应该把重要的放在主题句里

From another and the entire point of view, for every society economy is the foundation to any other upward buildings, economy is also the foundation of one society's stability. It is difficult to imagine a society filled with people who can not stuff their stomach with bread and water can run smoothly. Only after people can eat and cloth well, they can devote themselves to the contribution of the industry, science and arts. When people can get satisfying lives, they will not to think about extreme deeds. After all, the terrors need to sacrifice a lot for what they deed, so if they can lead a life in their dreams, they will not need to run risks. Therefore continued development of the economy is a basic and inevitable factor for a steady-going society. Without the prosperity of economy, one society can not get long, not to say stability.

In a word, how one government deal with illegal and extreme deeds really puts great influence on the stability of its society, but only this is far from enough. After all, people’s id can not be totally controlled by any rules and laws, even can not be well constrained by the person himself/herself. Adding that, the stability of one society is a synthetical result of education, economy, religions ethic and so on, besides the response to extreme behaviors. Therefore only attribute the stability of the society to one aspect is partial and arbitrary. To construct a stable society, many other factors need to be considered and well done.
整体感觉挺好就是主题句要和后面的例子对应，三个论点都很好的说

dgfyhchinaUID: 190311

bucuo

wildUID: 189262

非常感谢指向大海的修改，很有道理，在这些地方我以后一定注意，如有时间，我会按照你的意见重写一下这篇文章 ：）