argument21,限时老不行，拍拍看，24小时必回！

bluefiaryUID: 184899

Argument21 ------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：33分3秒     420 words
从2005年2月15日16时15分到2005年2月15日16时33分
------题目------
The following appeared in a memo from the new vice president of Sartorian, a company that manufactures men's clothing.
'Five years ago, at a time when we had difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, we discontinued production of our deluxe alpaca overcoats. Now that we have a new fabric supplier, we should resume production. This coat should sell very well: since we have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years and since our major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat, there will be pent-up customer demand. Also, since the price of most types of clothing has risen in each of the past five years, customers should be willing to pay significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago, and our company profits will increase.'
------正文------
In this memo, the president recommends that the company of Sartorian, in order to increase the company's profits, should resume production of men's clothing that was discontinued five years ago due to the difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric. To substantiate his recommendation, the author analyses that there should be a large demand for this coat since they have not offered this alpaca overcoat for five years and their major competitor also disappears. Meanwhile, the author assures that the price of these alpaca overcoats will increase along with many other types of clothing. However, after thorough analysis, you will see how groundless the conclusion is..

The major problem of this recommendation is that the author groundlessly assumes that this alpaca overcoat should sell very well, yet there is no sufficient evidence to support it is the case. Firstly, since they have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years, many customers may possibly turn their interests to other types of coat, not cling to this one any more. Although the company has the patience to wait the reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, most customers cannot help buying other types of coat if they have better quality, fashionable styles, etc. This is more likely to happen to today's rapidly changing society.

Secondly, the author fails to examine the true reason why their major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat. Is it because there is little or no market place for this kind of coat? Or making these coats does  not make much profits so they turn their objects to other types? or other possible reasons. Without comprehensive consideration and ruling out other possibilities we cannot safely believe that after adopting this policy the company can increase its profits.

Furthermore, though the price of most types of clothing has risen in each of the past five years, it does not follow that people would consent to paying significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago. Since before buying and paying for a commodity, customers would select from similar commodities and make a comparison, if some better ones come to them, they will not certainly buy this alpaca one of the company, let alone to paying higher prices for this alpaca coats.

Finally, granted all the evidences the author presents is somewhat convincing, it should be consider whether it will bring the company to get great profits.  The costs of this new fabric is not explicit, whether it can surely replace the former ones and cater for most customers or not , all these should be considered before any conclusion.

To sum up, the author is too hasty to come to the recommendation; therefore it is not persuasive and convincing as it stands. To strength his recommendation, he needs to get a comprehensive consideration about the entire possible factor. Furthermore, he needs a thorough investigation towards current marketplace and customers' interests.

fircattyUID: 166248

In this memo, the president recommends that the company of Sartorian, in order to increase the company's profits, should resume production of men's clothing that was discontinued five years ago due to the difficulties in obtaining reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric. To substantiate his recommendation, the author analyses that there should be a large demand for this coat since they have not offered this alpaca overcoat for five years and their major competitor also disappears. Meanwhile, the author assures that the price of these alpaca overcoats will increase along with many other types of clothing. However, after thorough analysis, you will see how groundless the conclusion is..

The major problem of this recommendation is that the author groundlessly assumes that this alpaca overcoat should sell very well, yet there is no sufficient evidence to support it is the case. Firstly, since they have not offered an alpaca overcoat for five years, many customers may possibly turn their interests to other types of coat, not cling to this one any more. Although the company has the patience to wait the reliable supplies of high-quality wool fabric, most customers cannot help buying other types of coat if they have better quality, fashionable styles, etc. This is more likely to happen to today's rapidly changing society.

Secondly, the author fails to examine the true reason why their major competitor no longer makes an alpaca overcoat. Is it because there is little or no market place for this kind of coat? Or making these coats does not make much profits so they turn their objects to other types? or other possible reasons. Without comprehensive consideration and ruling out other possibilities we cannot safely believe that after adopting this policy the company can increase its profits.

Furthermore, though the price of most types of clothing has risen in each of the past five years, it does not follow that people would consent to paying significantly higher prices for alpaca overcoats than they did five years ago. Since before buying and paying for a commodity, customers would [加上possibly显得不太绝对化]select from similar commodities and make a comparison, if some better ones come to them, they will not certainly buy this alpaca one of the company, let alone to paying higher prices for this alpaca coats.[关于这一段，我觉得从the arguer fails to include other factors, such as warmness,flexibility and style,concerning the sale of the coat nowadays.展开比较容易说吧]

Finally, granted all the evidences the author presents is somewhat convincing, it should be consider whether it will bring the company to get great profits. The costs of this new fabric is not explicit, whether it can surely replace the former ones and cater for most customers or not , all these should be considered before any conclusion.[自我感觉这一段理由非常好，可是没有讲得很清楚不透彻，the profits are decided by both the costs of the wool fabric and the prices of alpaca overcoats.It is very possible that,after a period of five years in a short supply,the price of the new fabric is more expensive than that of the old one.Moreover, the average salary of nowadays is likely to greatly increase,which means the company would probably pay more to the workers than they do five years ago. ]

To sum up, the author is too hasty to come to the recommendation; therefore it is not persuasive and convincing as it stands. To strength his recommendation, he needs to get a comprehensive consideration about the entire possible factor. Furthermore, he needs a thorough investigation towards current marketplace and customers' interests.

[这篇文章是限时写的吗？真的写的很棒啊！！不过我有一点意见供参考，我觉得错误不必找得面面俱到，关键就是要把每一条都分析的很透彻，如果能找到好多处错误的话，就把自己最能说得的几条写上，你觉得呢？]

bluefiaryUID: 184899

谢谢fircatty的意见，我写ARGUMENT的时候老想着把所有的毛病都挑出来，结果老发现时间不是很够。
现在可以参考你的意见了，呵呵。