Issue 108 恳请指教！互改请留下连接

xiaoxiao0524UID: 172512

In many countries it is now possible to turn on the television and view government at work. Watching these proceedings can help people understand the issues that affect their lives. The more kinds of government proceedings—trials, debates, meetings, etc—that are televised, the more society will benefit.
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In a world that propagates democracy, people should know about more and more political things. And television is the right means to attain this goal.

To begin with, for the publics, televising government proceedings, such as trials, debates, meetings, and so on will benefit a lot. On the one hand, since these government proceedings are supervised by most people, those who want to make their own profits when comply some procedures will find it very hard to accomplish their willing. On the contrary, if particular process are not known by television, even if they take a lot of money from the total used for city construction and tell their superior they spent such money for buying materials, they will not be worried about being found later. In this sense, letting the publics know these proceedings can avoid guilt behaviors of some relevant officials as well as can save a great amount of money for our government.

On the other hand, the publics can give government immediate feedbacks about one procedure, which may cause government takes measures that are more benefit for them. For example, in our country, workers always six days a week in the past and more often than not most of them feel very tired. When the nation council open meeting on whether decreasing work time of workers or not, everyone can watch the whole process of this meeting when those representatives talked this problem. Because this meeting encourage ordinary people tell their views by telephone when it was hold, so many people then said that they hope reduce their working time in one week so that they can work more efficiently next week. In the end a law that each worker works not more than 40 hours a week and have at least 2 days for a rest once a week was produced. Therefore, people have more leisure time nowadays and can enjoy their life better than before. If we do not have the right to know this meeting then, it is not hard to imagine we still have to work hard day after day.

Meanwhile, government can be more effective by televising what they do. As an old Chinese saying says that two heads are better than one. Although government officials are trained for their occupations before, the number of them is limited and their wisdom is restrained by their experiences. If their trials, debates, meetings are known to the publics, who may provide many good suggestions. In addition, when government meets difficult problems and the average person know it by watching television; officials can be inspired by the publics s. For example, several years ago, Chinese government had trials with the World Trade Organization and many countries oppose the entrance of China to this organization, when people knew it, almost everyone in this country support Chinese government. Under this circumstance, who want to give up, although those officials have met much defeat? Eventually, China is admitted to enter in the WTO. Without support from its people, the last trial may not success.

In conclusion, since letting the publics know more about what government is doing benefit both of them, this means should be largely applied in many countries.

向日葵的孩子UID: 162587

In a world that propagates democracy, people should know about more and more political things. And television is the right means to attain this goal.[偶觉得ISSUE的开头还是不要这么简单为好，一家之言]

To begin with, for the publics, televising government proceedings, such as trials, debates, meetings, and so on will benefit a lot. On the one hand, since these government proceedings are supervised by most people, those who want to make their own profits when comply some procedures will find it very hard to accomplish their willing[感觉这句话表达不太顺畅，有点不懂]. On the contrary, if particular process[proceedings] are not known by television, even if they take a lot of money from the total used for city construction and tell their superior they spent such money for buying materials, they will not be worried about being found later[整个这句都没怎么读懂，应该在on the contrary后面加个类似TS的总结性较强的一句话，因为你这里这个If说的内容比较具体]. In this sense, letting the publics know these proceedings can avoid guilt behaviors of some relevant officials as well as can save a great amount of money for our government.

On the other hand[因为上一段有on one hand……on the other hand了，这里就最好换个词], the publics can give government immediate feedbacks about one procedure, which may cause government takes[to take] measures that are more benefit for them. For example, in our country, workers always six days a week in the past and more often than not most of them feel very tired. When the nation council open meeting on whether decreasing work time of workers or not, everyone can watch the whole process of this meeting when those representatives talked[presented好些] this problem. Because this meeting encourage ordinary people tell[to tell] their views by telephone when it was hold, so[有because就别用so，如果你是想说so many people感觉也不太好] many people then said that they hope [to]  reduce their working time in one week so that they can work more efficiently next week. In the end a law that [law的谓语动词呢？] each worker works not more than 40 hours a week and have at least 2 days for a rest once a week was produced. Therefore, people have more leisure time nowadays and can enjoy their life better than before. If we do not have the right to know this meeting then, it is not hard to imagine we still have to work hard day after day.

Meanwhile, government can be more effective by televising what they do. As an old Chinese saying says[改成goes,says与前面的saying重复，读起来不太顺] that two heads are better than one[这个名言不太恰当吧，人民怎么说也不是head啊，即便他也可以提出很好的政府工作意见]. Although government officials are trained for their occupations before, the number of them is limited and their wisdom is restrained by their experiences. If their trials, debates, meetings are known to the publics, who may provide many good suggestions. In addition, when government meets difficult problems and the average person know it by watching television; officials can be inspired by the publics s. For example, several years ago, Chinese government had trials with the World Trade Organization and many countries oppose the entrance of China to this organization, when people knew it, almost everyone in this country support Chinese government. Under this circumstance, who want to give up, although those officials have met much defeat? Eventually, China is admitted to enter in the WTO. Without support from its people, the last trial may not success[个人觉得这个例子不太合适，人民对于加入WTO起到的作用真有那么大吗？].

In conclusion, since letting the publics know more about what government is doing benefit both of them, this means should be largely applied in many countries.
[论点和逻辑都没有大问题。语言需要加强，许多地方的用词都应该更正式一点。另外，这篇政治相关的题目是比较难写，主要是例子不容易找合适]

乒乓球爱上九月UID: 162925

xiaoxiao加油。上次怎么了。

xiaoxiao0524UID: 172512

呵呵，九月还记得我啊。上次verbal 考得太低了，只好重来一次。谢谢关心拉，我会好好努力的

xiaoxiao0524UID: 172512

谢谢向日葵的孩子，没想到有这么多语言错误，我down下来好好
看看改改，辛苦了