issue10 请大家帮我看看,缓慢前进中...

yogurt4UID: 198389

同主题写作,欢迎拍砖!
Government must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
------正文------
In an era of globalization, country all over the world is becoming more and more technologically advanced and less geographically isolated. Under this trend, preservation of a nation's unique cultural traditions has become one of the urgent concerns to almost every country. The speaker argues that it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated, thus their major cities should be provided with government funds in order to thrive. As far as I am concerned, however, major cities indeed play an important role with regard to cultural traditions, but several other dimensions of the mentioned statement should be examined in a deeper level.
       
Generally speaking, major cities are the most possible places where cultural traditions are generated and protected.  Just think about how these cities came into being. From thousands years old cities like Beijing and Athens, to modern flourishing cities such as New York and Toronto, city emerged as a cultural solution to a various kind of problems in religion, economy, agricultural and so on. In this years-taking process, beliefs, action, thought, customs have formed and evolved simultaneously. Respect for the old, for example, initially accompanied the fact that the old, once young and strong, devoted much of their life to the construction of the city. On the other hand, it is obvious that cities, especially major cities, can provide the stability needed for cultural traditions' healthy development. Only when a society is under a relatively stable order can its members spend part of their time and fruit, derived from economical activities, in tradition preservation.

Since there is no advantage without disadvantage, cities, especially those in postindustrial countries, are putting their cultural traditions into a vulnerable state. In major cities, no matter whether they are Western or Eastern ones, people here and there drink coca-cola, listen to Hip-pop, wear T-shirts that have names of American cities and professional sport teams, use instant messages and e-mails. Numerous ceremonies and religion rituals give their way to the rapid pace of modern life. Ironically, there is a tendency that the more one is educated and the broader his/her horizon is, the further they are brought away from their particular inherited cultural traditions. What is even worse, while convenient transportation and diverse groups of people enable a city to generate new cultural traditions, they are in turns making it difficult for people to preserve them: when one leaves a city because of marriage or better job opportunity, they bring something traditional away.

Although cultural traditions are primarily preserved and generated in major cities, does it mean that only big cities deserve government funds? Should the financial support be used to solve other city problems? Are there any other measures needed besides financial support to promise cultural prosperity of a city? In some hunting and gathering societies, for example, dance movements that imitate the movements of animals show people's desire to control those animals. More commonly, every nation has her weddings and funerals exercised with particular etiquette. Both the dance movements and etiquette may be abandoned by people on their road to the modern cities. As a consequence, we can only turn to small or rural areas for their existence. Another problem worth considering is the living standards of people in those major cities. In cities where the employment rate is low and its people are still struggling for their food and rent, it is irrational or even impossible for the government to support tradition preservations. Even if the governments are free of such concerns, sometimes other policies should be combined with money to fully activate cultural traditions.

To sum up, major cities have their innate advantages and inclination to generate and protect cultural traditions, although now these advantages are diminishing with the globalization and technology development. At the same time, cultural traditions also exist in small areas, which deserve our attention and support with no less importance. What is more, in some circumstances financial support should go to resolve more urgent problems like property and unemployment. Finally, government funds alone may far from be enough to prosper major cities to the greatest extent.  
限时总是不成功,每次总有新的不会拼的单词,有时还完全没思路,人生啊.

MadheroUID: 125272

同主题写作,欢迎拍砖!
Government must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
------正文------
In an era of globalization, countrycountries all over the world isare becoming more and more technologically advanced and less geographically isolated. Under this trend, preservation of a nation's unique cultural traditions has become one of the urgent concerns to almost every country. The speaker argues that it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated, thus their major cities should be provided with government funds in order to thrive. As far as I am concerned, however, major cities indeed play an important role with regard to cultural traditions, but several other dimensions of the mentioned statement should be examined in a deeper level.

Generally speaking, major cities are the most possible places where cultural traditions are generated and protected. Just think about how these cities came into being. From thousands years old cities like Beijing and Athens, to modern flourishing cities such as New York and Toronto, city emerged as a cultural solution to a various kind of problems in religion, economy, agricultural and so on. In this years-taking process, beliefs, action, thought, customs have formed and evolved simultaneously. Respect for the old, for example, initially accompanied the fact that the old, once young and strong, devoted much of their life to the construction of the city.过多篇幅用于城市的形成，是为了说明文化是在城市产生的吗？应将重点放在文化上 On the other hand, it is obvious that cities, especially major cities, can provide the stability needed for cultural traditions' healthy development. Only when a society is under a relatively stable order can its members spend part of their time and fruit, derived from economical activities, in tradition preservation.这部分是想说城市对文化的保护作用吧，由于城市的相对稳定性对于保护文化有积极作用。举一下例就更好了

Since there is no advantage without disadvantage, cities, especially those in postindustrial countries, are putting their cultural traditions into a vulnerable state. 这里可以进一步解释一下In major cities, no matter whether they are Western or Eastern ones, people here and there drink coca-cola, listen to Hip-pop我印象里是Hip-Hop, wear T-shirts that have names of American cities and professional sport teams, use instant messages and e-mails. Numerous ceremonies and religion rituals give their way to the rapid pace of modern life. Ironically, there is a tendency that the more one is educated and the broader his/her horizon is, the further they are brought away from their particular inherited cultural traditions. What is even worse, while convenient transportation and diverse groups of people enable a city to generate new cultural traditions, they are in turns making it difficult for people to preserve them: when one leaves a city because of marriage or better job opportunity, they bring something traditional away.全球化对传统文化的冲击在城市体现得更明显

Although cultural traditions are primarily preserved and generated in major cities, does it mean that only big cities deserve government funds? Should the financial support be used to solve other city problems? Are there any other measures needed besides financial support to promise cultural prosperity of a city? In some hunting and gathering societies, for example, dance movements that imitate the movements of animals show people's desire to control those animals. More commonly, every nation has her weddings and funerals exercised with particular etiquette. Both the dance movements and etiquette may be abandoned by people on their road to the modern cities.城市对保存文化的不足，感觉应放在上一段 As a consequence, we can only turn to small or rural areas for their existence.因此应向农村拨款吧？说明白一些比较好吧。 Another problem worth considering is the living standards of people in those major cities. In cities where the employment rate is low and its people are still struggling for their food and rent, it is irrational or even impossible for the government to support tradition preservations. Even if the governments are free of such concerns, sometimes other policies should be combined with money to fully activate cultural traditions.拨款应解决更实际的问题而不是文化问题？你的意思是反对题目提出的因果关系，应该向城市拨款，却不是因为文化而是更紧急的问题。会不会有点偏呢？Even if后面我不太明白你想表达什么意思，惭愧

To sum up, major cities have their innate advantages and inclination to generate and protect cultural traditions, although now these advantages are diminishing with the globalization and technology development. At the same time, cultural traditions also exist in small areas, which deserve our attention and support with no less importance. What is more, in some circumstances financial support should go to resolve more urgent problems like property and unemployment. Finally, government funds alone may far from be enough to prosper major cities to the greatest extent.
水平有限，说得不对的请指教

yogurt4UID: 198389

先谢谢你的砖头^-^

In an era of globalization, countrycountries all over the world isare becoming more and more technologically advanced and less geographically isolated.

真不知道我每次拿到题目都在慌个什么,第一句话就犯了这么低级的错误,要好好反省一下.

.过多篇幅用于城市的形成，是为了说明文化是在城市产生的吗？应将重点放在文化上

so on 的后面我就在将cultural traditions 的产生了.虽然说了beliefs,customs, action,thought,和一个尊敬老人的例子,是不是还不够具体呢?

Hip-pop我印象里是Hip-Hop

是的是的,我去查了一下,是hip-hop.

拨款应解决更实际的问题而不是文化问题？你的意思是反对题目提出的因果关系，应该向城市拨款，却不是因为文化而是更紧急的问题。会不会有点偏呢？Even if后面我不太明白你想表达什么意思，惭愧

倒数第二段我想了三个问题.一，有些小地方保留了文化传统,需要政府资助(我在这个问题的回答中的确漏掉了一句);二,在某些生活水平不发达的城市,有关生计的问题更需要政府资助;三,保护文化传统,光靠钱解决不了问题,还需要诸如政府政策等手段加以调节.
第三个问题写完我就后悔了.以我的速度,没有办法在一定的时间内展开这么多方面.勉强的带过,又没例子,说理我也没说清楚.所以决定把这个问题删了.不知道其他两个方面写清楚了吗?希望大家不吝指教,多给我提提意见.

arhooUID: 180462

In an era of globalization, countrycoutries all over the world isare becoming more and more technologically advanced and lessmore and more有点土。但既然用了，这里就要用less and less，比较工整，哈哈哈哈 geographically isolated. Under this trend, preservation of a nation's unique cultural traditions has become one of the urgent concerns to almost every country. The speaker argues that it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated, thus their major cities should be provided with government funds in order to thrive. As far as I am concerned, however, major cities indeed play an important role with regard to cultural traditions, but several other dimensions of the mentioned statement should be examined in a deeper level.这种这么笼统的话要少说，不管是在issue还是argument里面！

Generally speaking, major cities are the most possible places where cultural traditions are generated and protected. Just think about how these cities came into being. From thousands years old cities like Beijing and Athens, to modern flourishing cities such as New York and Toronto, city emerged as a cultural solution to a various kind of problems in religion, economy, agricultural and so on. In this years-taking process, beliefs, action, thought, customs have formed and evolved simultaneously. Respect for the old, for example, initially accompanied the fact that the old, once young and strong, devoted much of their life to the construction of the city. On the other hand, it is obvious that cities, especially major cities, can provide the stability needed for cultural traditions' healthy development. Only when a society is under a relatively stable order can its members spend part of their time and fruit, derived from economical activities, in tradition preservation.

Since there is no advantage without disadvantage, cities, especially those in postindustrial countries, are putting their cultural traditions into a vulnerable state. In major cities, no matter whether they are Western or Eastern ones, people here and there drink coca-cola, listen to Hip-pop, wear T-shirts that have names of American cities and professional sport teams, use instant messages and e-mails. Numerous ceremonies and religion rituals give their way to the rapid pace of modern life. Ironically, there is a tendency that the more one is educated and the broader his/her horizon is, the further they are brought away from their particular inherited cultural traditions.good! What is even worse, while convenient transportation and diverse groups of people enable a city to generate new cultural traditions, they are in turns making it difficult for people to preserve them: when one leaves a city because of marriage or better job opportunity, they bring something traditional away.这段写得好。但这段要说明什么？和前段的major cities are the most possible places是什么关系。由此对government的fiscal policy有什么影响，这种要点出来

Although cultural traditions are primarily preserved and generated in major cities, does it mean that only big cities deserve government funds? Should the financial support be used to solve other city problems? Are there any other measures needed besides financial support to promise cultural prosperity of a city?连续设问的出现标志着思路混乱的开始，哈哈。下面虽然对这些问题有所回应，但没有特别对口。 In some hunting and gathering societies, for example, dance movements that imitate the movements of animals show people's desire to control those animals. More commonly, every nation has her weddings and funerals exercised with particular etiquette. Both the dance movements and etiquette may be abandoned by people on their road to the modern cities. As a consequence, we can only turn to small or rural areas for their existence. 那政府应该怎样？说一句嘛Another problem worth considering is the living standards of people in those major cities. In cities where the employment rate is low and its people are still struggling for their food and rent, it is irrational or even impossible for the government to support tradition preservations. Even if the governments are free of such concerns, sometimes other policies should be combined with money to fully activate cultural traditions.这句多余了。这里应该还是和写argument有点区别的。financial support和other policies并不冲突。除非你说明financial support is inferior to other forms of support 再说，你对financial support的目的的理解仅限于preserve culture？我想issue本身的意思应该不是这样的。你可以看看同主题贴下面我对题目理解的异议，没人回应我，比较郁闷

To sum up, major cities have their innate advantages and inclination to generate and protect cultural traditions, although now these advantages are diminishing with the globalization and technology development. At the same time, cultural traditions also exist in small areas, which deserve our attention and support with no less importance. What is more, in some circumstances financial support should go to resolve more urgent problems like property and unemployment. Finally, government funds alone may far from be enough to prosper major cities to the greatest extent. 结尾写成这样的形式由点散，这几句话放在开头倒是不错的。

yogurt4UID: 198389

作文发上来以后，才在同主题里看见你的帖子
５５５～～～总是这么不凑巧．