issue 48 修改后求砖

white stoneUID: 203239

看了机经后发现这也是高频,请高手们赐教.
According to the speaker, the most significant events and trends are made by groups of people whose identities have long been forgotten, however, in our study of history we places too much emphasis on individuals rather than groups. I concede that in some historical record we lost the sight of groups’ significance, however, the research of famous individuals possess markable historical values and needs more care.

Firstly, we often give our attention to the people who achieves something important and use their virtues to educate our children. And we need this type of person to contribute to our society. Commonly, their action influenced all history. Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln were born on the same day-- February 12, 1809. They are also linked in another curious way-- for both must simultaneously play, and for similar reason, the role of man and legend. We have Honest Abe, who frees the slaves from pure sense of the burning injustice of it all, and who, as a young man, trudges for miles to return a few cents to a woman he has inadvertently short-charged. We may have a national or psychological need for such a Lincoln, but it also behooves historians to rescue the real, and world rusty complex, man from this factually inaccurate role. Likewise, science has no gods, and ancient sages are in strictly short supply. Thus, historical figures are gain form the stuff of necessary legends. The apple beats Newton; Galileo drops his missiles from the Leaning Tower; and Darwin, alone at sea, transforms the intellectual world on splendid mental isolation.

Secondly, the public usually focus on those famous few people, and events and trends they made are no exceptional. We used to trust those respectability who made a scientific breakthrough in their major, if someone who do not work according with the famous theory would be regarded as an eccentricity. We never take into account of the laborious work carrying out by the wire- pullers.

Admittedly, we should not neglect the important roles the groups play. When we retrospect the history, the majority of success and achievements were obtained by the cooperation of groups people rather than individuals. For example, the liberation of every independent country, if only our history hero, who we often referred in our textbook, struggled only by himself, what might be the result? When we are up against the severe acute respiratory syndrome (SARS), only the so-called medical expert strives at front line, I can make an assertion that we would not live an easeful life on the planet now.

In sum, it is necessary for us to realize that the significant events and trends in history were made by groups of people who are willing to be viewed with distain by the rest of the world. And we should try our best to register the groups who are unknown to the public but do a great lot to human being's progress. At the same time, a selecting work should be done on recording the devoting people.

lakeqianUID: 157560

好像不必复述原题吧？identities have long been forgotten和lost the sight of groups’ significance好像还不是很一样。
needs more care？groups’ significance？

give our attention to ？use their virtues to educate ？all history？虽然语法和表述问题多多，但是结下来的叙述却比较清晰，反差比较大似乎。
严格来说，we often give our attention to the people who achieves something important and use their virtues to educate our children不能证明或证伪we places too much emphasis on individuals。是否too much实际涉及了比较及其标准。

Secondly, the public usually focus on those famous few people, and events and trends they made are no exceptional.看来是认为place too much emphasis喽？可是这个观点和上一段we need this type of person to contribute to our society正好相反吧？
而且本段太短了吧？没论述。

we should not neglect the important roles the groups play。这个。。。顺序好像反了。本文应该是先判断出谁的贡献大，然后基于这个结论再说明是否过分关注个人（英雄）。而不是先说是否过分关注英雄，再说明做出判断的原因。

这篇我应该写过，不妨看看。

white stoneUID: 203239

谢谢lakeqian的指导