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[未归类] C6组的大家来开个会吧:) [复制链接]

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发表于 2005-7-4 12:24:37 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
大家都复习的怎么样拉?我才写了第1篇issue和argument,感觉时间很紧张了,但是写起来象挤牙膏一样痛苦。觉得还是先写提纲看范文,写起来回胸有成竹一点,所以先看看资料再写第2篇把,你们怎么样了呢?写了几篇了?

我把第一篇issue43发上来,大家给看看,指点一下吧。

Issue43  第1篇                    修改了3遍,508 words
------题目------
To be an effective leader, a public official must maintain the highest ethical and moral standards.
作为一位英名的领导人,公共官员必须维护最高的伦理和道德标准。
------正文------
    Whether a public official should maintain the highest ethical and moral standards is a hot issue in recent years. The answer of this question I think is that a public official should try to be a highest ethical and moral person.
    Firstly, preserving ethical and moral criterion are necessary for public officials to get more support and trust from the public. Since the standards are admitted and abided by majority of citizen, a person especially a public official, who violates them will be criticized and unaccepted by the public. As public characters, their behaviors are often concerned by the public, whether they keep up ethical and moral principles will affect their public reputation and their gaining respect from the public. For example, the Watergate scandal made Nixon disreputable and lose his presidental power because of public distrust to him. In contrast, Lincoln is one of the greatest presidents who struggled all his life for and was devoted to the career of slave liberation. Although he has been dead for a long time, people still miss and respect him so much. So as an effective leader, a public official should be a model of preserving ethical and moral rules to get public confidence.
     Secondly, it is harmful to the public benefit that officials lack high ethical and moral quality. Ethical and moral standards are handed down from one generation to another through thousands of years, and now formed into their own integrated rule accordant with requirements of present society. It tells people how to act and speak is comparatively right or proper. It advocates kindness, beauty and truth and opposes guilt and evil, so it can regulate people behavior in some extent by means of consensus pressure. When a public official has some power and get no enough supervision, he or she is very likely to abuse power and commit a crime such as corruption. For instance, some leaders in the Communist Party of China were reported corrupt. Economic development and comfortable life make them desire to be rich, but because of lacking of high ethic and morality they make money illegally and severely damage the public interest. In my opinion, it is benefit to us that public official are able to sustain their ethic and moral principles.
      Admittedly, it is a good horse that never stumbles. Public officials are not perfect one, their personal ethical and moral failings are inevitable. For instance, the marital indiscretions of present Kennedy, the sexual scandal of president Clinton. Chairman Mao, one of the greatest leaders in Chinese history, was indulged in his personality cult after he became the highest leader of China. He was commonly known in China as the “Four Greats”: “Great Teacher, Great Leader, Great Supreme Commander, Great Helmsman”. The Mao Cult finally resulted in the famous Cultural Revolution lasting 10 years that almost destroyed the development of China.
      In sum, I think a public official should be a man who maintains ethical and moral standards. Effective leaders are advanced examples of ethic and morality in this society that the public respect and admire.
fall 2006
莫愁前路无知己,天下谁人不识君!

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沙发
发表于 2005-7-4 20:56:08 |只看该作者
Whether a public official should maintain the highest ethical and moral standards is a hot issue in recent years. The answer of this question I think is that a public official should try to be a highest ethical and moral person.
[我想开头是否可以充实一下,个人看法, 呵呵, 其实我觉得我写这样的开头也是非常吃力的,在提出自己的想发的时候是否可以稍微具体点,或你可以把几个Top Sentences提炼一下放入开文也比单单的回答这个问题好点]
    Firstly, preserving ethical and moral criterion are necessary for public officials to get more support and trust from the public. Since the standards are admitted and abided by THE majority of citizen, a person especially a public official, who violates them will be criticized and unaccepted by the public. [或许一个例子更加具有说服力]As public characters, their behaviors are often concerned by the public, whether they keep up ethical and moral principles will affect their public reputation and their gaining respect from the public[似乎有问题]. For example, the Watergate scandal made Nixon disreputable and lose his presidental power because of public distrust to him[as the public trust gives him the position of presient]. In contrast, Lincoln is one of the greatest presidents who struggled all his life for and was devoted to the career of slave liberation. Although he has been dead for a long time, people still miss and respect him so much. So as an effective leader, a public official should be a model of preserving ethical and moral rules to get public confidence.[这个不是很适合]
     Secondly, it is harmful to the public benefit that officials lack high ethical and moral quality. Ethical and moral standards are handed down from one generation to another through thousands of years, and now formed into their own integrated rule accordant with requirements of present society. It tells people how to act and speak is comparatively right or proper. It advocates kindness, beauty and truth and opposes guilt and evil, so it can regulate people behavior in some extent by means of consensus pressure. When a public official has some power and get no enough supervision, he or she is very likely to abuse power and commit a crime such as corruption. For instance, some leaders in the Communist Party of China were reported corrupt. Economic development and comfortable life make them desire to be rich, but because of lacking of high ethic and morality they make money illegally and severely damage the public interest. In my opinion, it is benefit to us that public official are able to sustain their ethic and moral principles.[这段前面的论述有点勉强,后部分的例子也不是充分的论证了前面的主题]
      Admittedly, it is a good horse that never stumbles. Public officials are not perfect one, their personal ethical and moral failings are inevitable. For instance, the marital indiscretions of present Kennedy, the sexual scandal of president Clinton. Chairman Mao, one of the greatest leaders in Chinese history, was indulged in his personality cult after he became the highest leader of China. He was commonly known in China as the “Four Greats”: “Great Teacher, Great Leader, Great Supreme Commander, Great Helmsman”. The Mao Cult finally resulted in the famous Cultural Revolution lasting 10 years that almost destroyed the development of China.[。。。]
      In sum, I think a public official should be a man who maintains ethical and moral standards. Effective leaders are advanced examples of ethic and morality in this society that the public respect and admire. [结尾很仓促]

呵呵 我稍微看了一下你的文章 当然这个主题不是很好写 要是我动手写专业文章的话 也是慢吞吞的 我建议你的语言有精炼点 局势变化有
还有就是论证过程要严密点 个人的想法 望指教 谢谢

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板凳
发表于 2005-7-4 21:14:03 |只看该作者
Whether a public official should maintain the highest ethical and moral standards is a hot issue in recent years. The answer of this question I think is that a public official should try to be a highest ethical and moral person.
    Firstly, preserving ethical and moral criterion are necessary for public officials to get more support and trust from the public. Since the standards are admitted and abided by majority of citizen, a person especially a public official, who violates them will be criticized and unaccepted by the public. As public characters, their behaviors are often concerned by the public, whether they keep up ethical and moral principles will affect their public reputation and their gaining respect from the public. For example, the Watergate scandal made Nixon disreputable and lose his presidental power because of public distrust to him. In contrast, Lincoln is one of the greatest presidents who struggled all his life for and was devoted to the career of slave liberation. Although he has been dead for a long time, people still miss and respect him so much. So as an effective leader, a public official should be a model of preserving ethical and moral rules to get public confidence.
     Secondly, it is harmful to the public benefit that officials lack high ethical and moral quality. Ethical and moral standards are handed down from one generation to another through thousands of years, and now formed into their own integrated rule accordant with requirements of present society. It tells people how to act and speak is comparatively right or proper. It advocates kindness, beauty and truth and opposes guilt and evil, so it can regulate people behavior in some extent by means of consensus pressure. When a public official has some power and get no enough supervision, he or she is very likely to abuse power and commit a crime such as corruption. For instance, some leaders in the Communist Party of China were reported corrupt. Economic development and comfortable life make them desire to be rich, but because of lacking of high ethic and morality they make money illegally and severely damage the public interest. In my opinion, it is benefit to us that public official are able to sustain their ethic and moral principles.
      Admittedly, it is a good horse that never stumbles. Public officials are not perfect one, their personal ethical and moral failings are inevitable. For instance, the marital indiscretions of present Kennedy, the sexual scandal of president Clinton. Chairman Mao, one of the greatest leaders in Chinese history, was indulged in his personality cult after he became the highest leader of China. He was commonly known in China as the “Four Greats”: “Great Teacher, Great Leader, Great Supreme Commander, Great Helmsman”. The Mao Cult finally resulted in the famous Cultural Revolution lasting 10 years that almost destroyed the development of China.
      In sum, I think a public official should be a man who maintains ethical and moral standards. Effective leaders are advanced examples of ethic and morality in this society that the public respect and admire.

1. 段落格式推荐用美式写法
2. 还没有养成写作的套路
3. B2后面有的跑,最后最好再强调一下,道德水平高的领导在缺乏约束时不容易滥用自己的权利。
4. B3举毛的例子有culture gap。不如说张伯伦的绥靖政策纵然了纳粹对欧洲的侵略,最终导致英国子酿苦果。

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地板
发表于 2005-7-4 23:41:58 |只看该作者

致gthomestay

你说的有道理,开头太单薄,把ts放进来比较好。
As public characters, their behaviors are often concerned by the public, whether they keep up ethical and moral principles will affect their public reputation and their gaining respect from the public[似乎有问题].是指什么问题啊?是表达不清还是论证不合理?
fall 2006
莫愁前路无知己,天下谁人不识君!

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发表于 2005-7-4 23:48:23 |只看该作者

弱问leo_chen

谢谢你的建议:)
什么是美式写法?
写作的套路哪里可以看啊?我是看了范文和一些分析,学他们的样子写的,可能是没学会?
fall 2006
莫愁前路无知己,天下谁人不识君!

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发表于 2005-7-4 23:59:49 |只看该作者
呵呵,把Argu147写了一下,再发上来大家给看看。大家的文章写的怎么样拉,大家一起交流交流啊:)

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=295371&extra=page%3D1

[ Last edited by victor2005 on 2005-7-5 at 11:56 ]
fall 2006
莫愁前路无知己,天下谁人不识君!

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发表于 2005-7-5 08:21:16 |只看该作者

回复 #4 victor2005 的帖子

As public characters, their behaviors are often concerned by the public, whether they keep up ethical and moral principles will affect their public reputation and their gaining respect from the public[似乎有问题].是指什么问题啊?是表达不清还是论证不合理?
我的意思是说你 前面的例子和这个没有什么联系 也不知道你是否在总结这一段还是结束哪个例子 呵呵 也许是我的理解问题 望指教

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发表于 2005-7-5 10:52:30 |只看该作者
把地址连接在帖子里面,文章放到外面,效果更好~~~~
色不迷人人自迷。
天佑中华!!Bless bless bless

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发表于 2005-7-5 11:40:42 |只看该作者
对啊,谢谢酸奶提醒:)
fall 2006
莫愁前路无知己,天下谁人不识君!

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RE: C6组的大家来开个会吧:) [修改]

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C6组的大家来开个会吧:)
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-294918-1-1.html
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