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In this argument, the arguer claims that in order to reduce absenteeism and tardiness and to improve academic performance in all of Mylar's elemaetary and scondary schools, they should provide breakfasts for all students before school day. To substantiate his claimation (似乎不太常用呀, the arguer provides an evidence(用单数吧,字典里好像表示迹象的时候才用作复数) of a study involving 100 schoolchildern ages from five to twelve. A mayor assumption underlying this argument is that eating breakfast makes students tend to perform better in school. A careful examination of this argument would reveal how groundless this argument would be. 不够简练吧,但是第一篇的话,已经有些如道了
The major problem with this argument is that the study lacks the credibility which unable (不是动词吧 it to lend strong support to what the arguer assumes. 6 months is such a short amount of time that it can not say anything about the causal relationship between eating breakfast between reduction of absentism and tardiness. What is more, the selecetion of 100 students may be selective( on purpose?)warranted to give any support to the arguer's assumption, and the arguer fails to provide any information to rule out other factors that might cause the reduction of absentism and tardiness in his incomplete comparison. These 100 students might be the students who like get up earlier and study harder than other students at the first place, or occationally they might be forced to get up early by their parents during the study pariod.
Another problem undermine the argument is that the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between eating breakfast before school time to better performance of the students. In absence of any information concerning the casual effort of eating breakfast to better performance of the students,or the relationship bewteen healthier breakfast and better performance, we cannot agree with the arguer's assumption that childre who regularly eat a healthful breakfast tend to perform better in school.
Finally, the claimation the arguer says is lack of sufficiency and necessity. Because the study only involve students ages from five to twelve, the arguer has no wuarant to propose the sencondary school, which often teach students aged above 12 in usual, to provide breakfast for all students before each school day. Moreover, the arguer neglect other possible measures to reduce absenteeism and tardiness and ensure better performance of the students such as improving the quality of the school education, enhancing interest studing in school, or more praising good actions and performance in school , etc.
In conclusion, the argument is not persuasive as it stands, the evidence provided in the argument does not lend strong support to what the arguer mantians. To make it logically acceptable, the arguer would have to provide complete information to convince us that the study has credibility and thus is representative. And to better evaluate the argument, the arguer would have to give substantial facts that eating breakfast before school do account for the better performance of the students
不好意思, 有些事情, 先改到这里了. 感觉写的有些到位了,但是语法错误好多啊! 既然时间够用,要多多检查了.加油加油 |
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