issue121...fantasy group ...必回拍

foreveraUID: 202035

121. "At various times in the geological past, many species have become extinct as a result of natural, rather than human, processes. Thus, there is no justification for society to make extraordinary efforts, especially at a great cost in money and jobs, to save endangered species."


1．        首先区别自然灭绝和由于人类活动灭绝的不同
2．        由于人类的活动造成物种大量灭绝的坏处
（1）        破坏了生态平衡
（2）        造成生物圈的单一化，人类可选择的不同类型的生存环境减少
3．        保护生物物种并不是浪费了金钱，而是一种回报很高的投资，更何况保护生物也为社会提供了很多就业的机会。


Should the society make extra efforts to prevent endangered species from extinction? Facing this complex issue, basically I have to acknowledge that some species do disappear for the reason of nature, but as far as I am concerned the impact human activities have on the living environments is pushing endangered species to the edge of abyss-extinction. Thus, I should claim that the society and government has the accountability to save these species at any cost.

To begin with, it is significant to distinguish the difference of natural extinction and extinction cause by human. On one hand, alone the extreme long natural history, great amounts of species disappear from the earth in accordance with Darwin’s evolution theory. And the extinction of former species is the result of the appearance of another more advanced species. For instance, millions of years ago, the giant dinosaur died partly due to the geological movement, but, to large extent, the reason for the extinction of dinosaur was a shortage of food supply. Their food resource was replaced by the more advanced flowers. Consequently, even though dinosaur disappeared, the total amount of species was not seriously decreased. On the other hand, human activities did and do destroy the living environment of numerous species, as a result, the limited living resource and bad living condition accelerate the extinction of species. Comparing to the former aspect, human activities do not lead to new kinds of animals coming into being, under this circumstance, the total number on the species list keeps on decreasing.

Based on the differentiation of natural and men-made extinction, I should point out several bad effects caused by human activities as follow.

First of all, abnormal extinction of animals scares the balance in ecosystem. Every kind of animals plays their own role in the chain of food, so the disappearance of one loop in the chain might result in serious tragedy in ecosystem-the species above might die out for the insufficient food supply, and the species below might grow without proper control. Taking owl for instance, excessive hunting of owl may lead to an increasing number of field mice, and as a result crops are serious damaged by the mice. Ultimately, it is human being ourselves whose profit is disturbed.

What’s more, excessive decrease of species would result in a lack of diversity in both ecosystem, and further human being would also face the dilemma of insufficient choices of living environment. In recent years, wild species are disappearing at a high speed, so we can only see some endangered animals in the zoos, let alone the close contact. Further, in the near future it is quite possible that we live in all men-made, eat all men-raise, and so forth. Accordingly, the quality of people’s daily lives is much scared, as a lack of diverse life patterns.

Under this circumstance, protecting the endangered species is not a waste of money and human resource, but a most profitable investigation. A balanced bio-cycle, which needs the diversity of species greatly, is able to bring a better living environment to human beings, and further a decreasing amount of natural disasters, thus, the money and manpower spent to prevented human civilizations from being ruined by natural tragedy can be transmitted to promote the quality of people’s lives. To this extent, to protect endangered species is to benefit ourselves, even in indirect methods. Further, in the process of protection, an increasing amount of jobs are available to alleviate the job-hunting stress.

To sum up, even some species disappear for natural reasons, but people should not neglect the fatal effect that human activities have on the bio-cycle. So, it is quite recommended that all governments and social powers devote to protecting the endangered species.


倒数第3段写的实在惨不忍睹。。。不过也懒的改了。。。

[ Last edited by forevera on 2005-8-25 at 13:53 ]

michel_shaoUID: 204704

Should the society make extra efforts to prevent endangered species from extinction? Facing this complex issue, basically I have to acknowledge that some species do disappear for the reason of nature, but as far as I am concerned the impact human activities have on the living environments is pushing endangered species to the edge of abyss-extinction(英文中有这样的表达吗，因为自己不知道，想问下LZ). Thus, I should claim that the society and government has the accountability to save these species at any cost.

To begin with, it is significant to distinguish the difference of natural extinction and extinction cause by human. On one hand, alone the extreme long natural history, great amounts of species disappear from the earth in accordance with Darwin’s evolution theory. And the extinction of former species is the result of the appearance of another more advanced species. For instance, millions of years ago, the giant dinosaur died partly due to the geological movement, but, to large extent, the reason for the extinction of dinosaur was a shortage of food supply. Their food resource was replaced by the more advanced flowers. Consequently, even though dinosaur disappeared, the total amount of species was not seriously decreased. On the other hand, human activities did and do destroy the living environment of numerous species, as a result, the limited living resource and bad living condition accelerate the extinction of species. Comparing to the former aspect, human activities do not lead to new kinds of animals coming into being, under this circumstance, the total number on the species list keeps on decreasing.

Based on the differentiation of natural and men-made extinction, I should point out several bad effects caused by human activities as follow.

First of all, abnormal extinction of animals scares the balance in ecosystem. Every kind of animals plays their own role in the chain of food, so the disappearance of one loop in the chain might result in serious tragedy in ecosystem-the species above might die out for the insufficient food supply, and the species below might grow without proper control. Taking owl for instance, excessive hunting of owl may lead to an increasing number of field mice, and as a result crops are serious damaged by the mice. Ultimately, it is human being ourselves whose profit is disturbed.（觉得LZ这个地方说得很清楚）

What’s more, excessive decrease of species would result in a lack of diversity in both ecosystem, and further human being would also face the dilemma of insufficient choices of living environment. In recent years, wild species are disappearing at a high speed, so we can only see some endangered animals in the zoos, let alone the close contact. Further, in the near future it is quite possible that we live in all men-made, eat all men-raise, and so forth. Accordingly, the quality of people’s daily lives is much scared, as a lack of diverse life patterns.（好象不太有说服力，我自己写保持物种多样性也没有写出个好理由来）
Under this circumstance, protecting the endangered species is not a waste of money and human resource, but a most profitable investigation. A balanced bio-cycle, which needs the diversity of species greatly, is able to bring a better living environment to human beings, and further a decreasing amount of natural disasters, thus, the money and manpower spent to prevented human civilizations from being ruined by natural tragedy can be transmitted to promote the quality of people’s lives. To this extent, to protect endangered species is to benefit ourselves, even in indirect methods. Further, in the process of protection, an increasing amount of jobs are available to alleviate the job-hunting stress.

To sum up, even some species disappear for natural reasons, but people should not neglect the fatal effect that human activities have on the bio-cycle. So, it is quite recommended that all governments and social powers devote to protecting the endangered species.

好象发现LZ的写作结构是第一段写一个意思，然后用一小段写引出下面的另一个意思，好象和大部分人的不同，比较好的。而且我觉得语言流畅啊，请问LZ写的时候会不会有想个句子很久的时候啊？


ISSUE GLOBAL UNIVERSITY
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... p;page=1#pid1783290

[ Last edited by michel_shao on 2005-8-25 at 20:51 ]

flealdaUID: 2118390

首先我想指出我觉得楼主在思路上不妥的地方


1．        首先区别自然灭绝和由于人类活动灭绝的不同(这个论点不是很切题,觉得没必要花一个独立段落论证)

2．        由于人类的活动造成物种大量灭绝的坏处
（1）        破坏了生态平衡
（2）        造成生物圈的单一化，人类可选择的不同类型的生存环境减少(我觉得这两个论点完全可以合为一个,因为他们是因果关系)

3．        保护生物物种并不是浪费了金钱，而是一种回报很高的投资(真的么?)，更何况保护生物也为社会提供了很多就业的机会。(但更多的还是人类的投入巨大的问题)


改了楼主上次的文章,也觉得论点不是很切题,主要是观点不同...所以不知道说什么...希望不要介意:)

foreveraUID: 202035

我觉得第一段非常非常的必要,因为题目中就是说物种的自然灭绝和由于人类的活动灭绝没有什么本质的不同才会得出那样的结论...如果没有明显区别自然灭绝和由于人类活动灭绝的不同既无力回应作者的观点也没法展开下面的论述....
至于剩下的两点我觉得我在文章中说的差不多比较清楚了吧...都是分开从不同角度分析的...我觉得你说的前几点都是我重点注意的地方。。。
难道只看了提纲而没看全文???

[ Last edited by forevera on 2005-8-26 at 13:49 ]

modeuxUID: 2107416

Should the society make extraextra不是额外的吗？楼主是不是说extraordinary？efforts to prevent endangered species from extinction? Facing this complex issue, basically I have to acknowledge that some species do disappear for the reason of nature, but as far as I am concerned加个with比较好吧 the impact human activities have on the living environments is pushing endangered species to the edge of abyss-extinction或者推向灭绝的深渊，或者推向灭绝的边缘，好像更通一些。还是这样是固定用法？楼主告知。. Thus, I should claim that the society and government has the accountability to save these species at any cost.

To begin with, it is significant to distinguish the difference of natural extinction and extinction causecaused by human. On one hand, alone the extreme long natural history, great amounts of species disappear from the earth in accordance with Darwin’s evolution theory. And the extinction of former前一种？用above好些 species is the result of the appearance of another more advanced species. For instance, millions of years ago, the giant dinosaur died partly due to the geological movement, but, to large extent, the reason for the extinction of dinosaur was a shortage of food supply. Their food resource was replaced by the more advanced flowers. Consequently, even though dinosaur disappeared, the total amount of species was not seriously decreaseddecrease用不着被动吧~~. On the other hand, human activities did and do destroy the living environment of numerous species, as a result, the limited living resource and bad living condition accelerate the extinction of species. Comparing to楼主犯错误咯~~~compare to是把…比喻成..compare with才是和…相比 the former aspect, human activities do not lead to new kinds of animals coming into being, under this circumstance, the total number on the species list keeps on decreasing.

Based on the differentiation of natural and men-mademan-made extinction, I should point out several bad effects caused by human activities as followfollows.

First of all, abnormal extinction of animals scares这里惊吓是何意思？ the balance in ecosystem. Every kind of animals这句和上句的animals改成species吧，物种不只是动物啊~~ plays their own role in the chain of food, so the disappearance of one loop in the chain might result in serious tragedy in ecosystem-the species above might die out for the insufficient food supply, and the species below下面的物种？~~~ might grow without proper control. Taking owl for instance, excessive hunting of owl may lead to an increasing number of field mice, and as a result crops are serious damaged by the mice. Ultimately, it is human being ourselves whose profit is disturbed.

What’s more, excessive decrease of species would result in a lack of diversity in both ecosystem, and further human being would also face the dilemma of insufficient choices of living environment生存环境选择不足，这是明确的困难，不是dilemma进退两难的局面啊~~~. In recent years, wild species are disappearing at a high speed, so we can only see some endangered animals in the zoos, let alone the close contact. Further, in the near future it is quite possible that we live in all men-made, eat all men-raise, and so forth. Accordingly, the quality of people’s daily lives is much scared, as a lack写成lacking of是不是简洁一点 of diverse life patterns.

Under this circumstance, protecting the endangered species is not a waste of money and human resource, but a most profitable investigation. profitable的内容都是在后面论述的，为什么开头要用under this circunstance？感觉读的时候像是根据上面的内容推出来的 A balanced bio-cycle, which needs the diversity of species greatly, is able to bring a better living environment to human beings, and further a decreasing amount of natural disasters, thus, the money and manpower spent to prevented human civilizations from being ruined by natural tragedy can be transmitted to promote the quality of people’s lives. To this extent, to protect endangered species is to benefit ourselves, even in indirect methods. Further, in the process of protection, an increasing amount of jobs are available to alleviate the job-hunting stress.

To sum up, even这里的even读的好像不是很顺~~~ some species disappear for natural reasons, but people should not neglect the fatal effect that human activities have on the bio-cycle. So, it is quite recommended that all governments and social powers devote to protecting the endangered species.

meteor18_leeUID: 189655

比较支持LZ的观点，呵呵
行文很流畅啊！
大家改的那么好，我总是没地方下手了，555

foreveraUID: 202035

多谢modeux 。。。最近语法错误好象在增多。。。ft
edge of abyss-extinction这里的extinction是解释abyss的。。。中间有“-”的哦。。。

killowindUID: 207262

Consequently, even though dinosaur disappeared, the total amount of species was not seriously decreased.显然是你自己在这里瞎编,要是你考过托福的话在有一篇阅读里写道那次95%的生物都灭绝了

killowindUID: 207262

Further, in the near future it is quite possible that we live in all men-made, eat all men-raise, and so forth

那你现在吃的不是men-raise???

boreasUID: 183790

Should the society make extra efforts to prevent endangered species from extinction? Facing this complex issue, basically I have to acknowledge that some species do disappear for the reason of nature, but as far as I am concerned (前面已经有I 了，重复吧) the impact human activities have （多余吧）on the living environments is pushing endangered species to the edge of abyss-extinction. Thus, I should claim that the society and government has the accountability to save these species at any cost.

To begin with, it is significant to distinguish the difference of natural extinction and extinction cause by human. On one hand, alone the extreme long natural history, great amounts of species disappear from the earth in accordance with Darwin’s evolution theory. And the extinction of former species is the result of the appearance of another more advanced species. For instance, millions of years ago, the giant dinosaur died partly due to the geological movement, but, to large extent, the reason for the extinction of dinosaur was a shortage of food supply. Their food resource was replaced by the more advanced flowers. Consequently, even though dinosaur disappeared, the total amount of species was not seriously decreased. On the other hand, human activities did and do destroy the living environment of numerous species, as a result, the limited living resource and bad living condition accelerate the extinction of species. Comparing to ( with)  the former aspect, human activities do not lead to new kinds of animals coming into being, under this circumstance, the total number on the species list keeps on decreasing.

Based on the differentiation of natural and men-made extinction, I should point out several bad effects caused by human activities as follow.

First of all, abnormal extinction of animals scares (destroy 如何) the balance in ecosystem. Every （each） kind of animals plays their (its) own role in the chain of food, so the disappearance of one loop in the chain might result in serious tragedy in ecosystem-the species above might die out for the insufficient food supply, and the species below might grow without proper control. Taking owl for instance, excessive hunting of owl may lead to an increasing number of field mice, and as a result crops are serious damaged by the mice. Ultimately, it is human being ourselves whose profit is disturbed.

What’s more, excessive decrease of species would result in a lack of diversity in both ecosystem, and further human being would also face the dilemma of insufficient choices of living environment. In recent years, wild species are disappearing at a high speed, so we can only see some endangered animals in the zoos, let alone the close contact. Further, in the near future it is quite possible that we live in all men-made, eat all men-raise, and so forth. Accordingly, the quality of people’s daily lives is much( much 不能修饰形容词原籍的) scared, as a lack of diverse life patterns.

Under this circumstance, protecting the endangered species is not a waste of money and human resource, but a most profitable investigation.（这个不大明白）A balanced bio-cycle, which needs the diversity of species greatly, is able to bring a better living environment to human beings, and further a decreasing amount of natural disasters, thus, the money and manpower spent to prevented human civilizations from being ruined by natural tragedy can be transmitted to promote the quality of people’s lives. To this extent, to protect endangered species is to benefit ourselves, even in indirect methods. Further, in the process of protection, an increasing amount of jobs are available to alleviate the job-hunting stress.

To sum up, even some species disappear for natural reasons, but people should not neglect the fatal effect that human activities have on the bio-cycle. So, it is quite recommended that all governments and social powers devote to protecting the endangered species.

行文很流畅阿，我都在45分钟写不出这么多来。后面似乎比较单薄，我也常这样。总体很不错哦
http://edu.gter.net/bbs/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

[ Last edited by boreas on 2005-8-27 at 16:49 ]

foreveraUID: 202035

Originally posted by killowind at 2005-8-27 16:13

那你现在吃的不是men-raise???

老兄不至于如此较真吧。。。。