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[i习作temp] Issue99 pragmatism & idealism 恳请互拍 [复制链接]

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发表于 2006-2-8 14:51:31 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
TOPIC: ISSUE 99 - "In any realm of life-whether academic, social, business, or political-the only way to succeed is to take a practical, rather than an idealistic, point of view. Pragmatic behavior guarantees survival, whereas idealistic views tend to be superceded by simpler, more immediate options."

Syllabus:
1. 承认pragmatism 的价值,意义,作用
2. 但是pragmatism 不是成功的唯一途径,从对成功的定义论证idealism也能成功
3. idealism的现实意义,指出idealism不会消亡
限时,因为例子一下子就想起来了,字数有点多。自己初步改了一遍,请各位大虾狠拍,留链一定回拍。谢谢

Nowadays we are living in a more and more practical world and pursuing wealth and status becomes the main goal for most of us. However, for my part, I cannot agree with the author's statement that pragmatism is the only way to succeed and it will supersede any idealistic point of views. Not only because idealistic views maintain and represent our life values, but also for the reason that with this idealism, we can see far beyond pragmatism can take us.

First of all, I have to concede that pragmatism is essential in our everyday lives and is important to our pursuit for success. To get a decent job and enjoy a better life in the future, we students have to strive hard to get enough credits that are needed for graduation, and of course, many high school students enter the universities merely for the reason that a bachelor diploma can more often than not guarantee their future career lives. In business area, the main task of a CEO is to increase the profit of the company, and if he wants to maintain his job, he had better off making his effort to promote every index that the directorate cares for. Pragmatism appears more clearly in politics. The reason why a president candidate must win his vote campaign to a great extent not lies in his eagerness to fulfill his ideal, but that if he lost, he would also lose his financial support and the future of his political life.

But the importance of pragmatism does not invariably mean that it is the only way to success. Actually, many people have a totally different definition of success. If a person describe success as a life with cars, decent jobs and a great deal of bank saves, pragmatism seems to be the first staff to him because he is living in a material world. But many times we ask: what is the value of our lives, what is the main difference between we human beings and animals. The answer is clear to most of us: we are humans for we try to fulfill our ideals, not just for survival. We consider Van Gogh a successful artist even though he has no money. His enthusiasm of expressing his conflict thinking in his paintings wins him his long lasting world wide fame. We admire what Xie Hailong, a Chinese journalist, did even though he has no car, no big house. He can be remembered by our descendants because he started the Project Hope, which has subsidized many pool children to finish their education. Most of us have our own ideals, in which underlie our life values, and for me, I want to protect the environment of my country from being polluted.

Even those who only pursue material goals need idealism. In other words, idealism has its own practical merit for existing. Idealism can stimulate people to pursue a more meaningful target. A student with his own ideal will not be confused about his future life when he graduates. Idealism equips people more insightful outlooks. A CEO who cares for the company’s social responsibility will benefit the company more that those who only put their eyes on economic profit. Idealism also let people make up correct judgments and prevents people from making mistakes. During the World War II, it is no doubt that a person who wanted his fame and wealth should run to Hitler and Nazi. But clearly, most of people did not do this because they believe the peace and justice of the world.

From the analysis above, it is safe to draw my conclusion that although we cannot deny that pragmatism is important to succeed in the current real world, idealism has not lost its inherent brilliance. Only by idealism can we go further in our lives.
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沙发
发表于 2006-2-8 17:08:27 |只看该作者
帖子又沉了,自己回一下
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板凳
发表于 2006-2-8 23:17:02 |只看该作者
1. 承认pragmatism 的价值,意义,作用
2. 但是pragmatism 不是成功的唯一途径,从对成功的定义论证idealism也能成功
3. idealism的现实意义,指出idealism不会消亡
限时,因为例子一下子就想起来了,字数有点多。自己初步改了一遍,请各位大虾狠拍,留链一定回拍。谢谢

Nowadays we are living in a more and more practical world and pursuing wealth and status becomes the main goal for most of us. However, for my part, I cannot agree with the author's statement that pragmatism is the only way to succeed and (it)可省略 will supersede any idealistic point of views. Not only because idealistic views maintain and represent our life values, but also for the reason that with (this)去掉 idealism, we can see far beyond pragmatism can take us.

First of all, I have to concede that pragmatism is essential in our everyday lives and is important to our pursuit for success. To get a decent job and enjoy a better life in the future, we students have to strive hard to get enough credits that are needed for graduation, and of course, many high school students enter the universities merely for the reason that a bachelor diploma can more often than not guarantee their future career lives. In business area, the main task of a CEO is to increase the profit of the company, and if he wants to maintain his job, he had better off making his effort to promote every index that the directorate cares for. Pragmatism appears more clearly in politics. The reason why a president candidate must win his vote campaign to a great extent not lies in his eagerness to fulfill his ideal, but that if he lost lose, he would also lose his financial support and the future of his political life.
我觉得你在这段是想说你concede现实主义的好处的。那么你所有下面的论述都要围绕这个好处展开,并赋予感情色彩,即功利主义不论对学习、商业、政治都是能带来利益的。但是你看看,你下面论述的都是现实主义在现实生活中的表现。光提表现是没有感情色彩的。而且我从你的字里行间还看到诸如“have to”这种表示不情愿,不得不的感情色彩。其实你重新改写一下句子还是可以回到主题的:比如你可以说,学生取得良好的成绩有助于他们找到好的工作,政治家迎合大众有助于其上台等等。你思量一下。
But the importance of pragmatism does not invariably mean that it is the only way to success. Actually, many people have a totally different definition of success. If a person describe success as a life with cars, decent jobs and a great deal of bank saves, pragmatism seems to be the first staff to him because he is living in a material world. But many times we ask: what is the value of our lives, what is the main difference between we human beings and animals. The answer is clear to most of us: we are humans for we try to fulfill our ideals, not just for survival. We consider Van Gogh a successful artist even though he has no money. His enthusiasm of expressing his conflict thinking in his paintings wins him his long lasting world wide fame. We admire what Xie Hailong, a Chinese journalist, did even though he has no car, no big house. He can be remembered by our descendants because he started the Project Hope, which has subsidized many pool children to finish their education. Most of us have our own ideals, in which underlie our life values, and for me, I want to protect the environment of my country from being polluted.

Even those who only pursue material goals need idealism. In other words, idealism has its own practical merit for existing. Idealism can stimulate people to pursue a more meaningful target. A student with his own ideal will not be confused about his future life when he graduateswhy?. Idealism equips people more insightful outlooks. A CEO who cares for the company’s social responsibility will benefit the company more thatthan those who only put their eyes on economic profitwhy?表现在哪里? Idealism also let people make up correct judgments and prevents people from making mistakeswhy?. During the World War II, it is no doubt that a person who wanted his fame and wealth should run to Hitler and Nazi. But clearly, most of people did not do this because they believe the peace and justice of the world.
汗。这段没有看懂呐。看到第一句话,拥有物质目标的人也需要理想主义。我就觉得很新颖,不晓得是什么意思。但是看完了论证我还是不晓得是什么意义呀。你作出了一系列的论断,但是为什么会有这些论断,有什么依据。你一点都没有讲清楚呀。
From the analysis above, it is safe to draw my conclusion that although we cannot deny that pragmatism is important to succeed in the current real world, idealism has not lost its inherent brilliance. Only by idealism can we go further in our lives.

看完了这篇文章,我觉得前面两段都可以接受,但是第三段没有论述清楚

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地板
发表于 2006-2-8 23:19:23 |只看该作者

Selina斗胆来拍一拍啦~~~

TOPIC: ISSUE 99 - "In any realm of life-whether academic, social, business, or political-the only way to succeed is to take a practical, rather than an idealistic, point of view. Pragmatic behavior guarantees survival, whereas idealistic views tend to be superceded by simpler, more immediate options."

Syllabus:
1. 承认pragmatism 的价值,意义,作用
2. 但是pragmatism 不是成功的唯一途径,从对成功的定义论证idealism也能成功
3. idealism的现实意义,指出idealism不会消亡
限时,因为例子一下子就想起来了,字数有点多。自己初步改了一遍,请各位大虾狠拍,留链一定回拍。谢谢

Nowadays we are living in a more and more(increasingly) practical world and (如果这句的主语是pursuing的话,建议用个从句:in which pursuing ...至少and之前也要加个逗号嘛,呵呵)pursuing wealth and status becomes the main goal for most of us. However, for my part, I(for my part可以去掉,和I disagree中的I重复了) cannot agree with(agree with某人,不能加事物) the author's statement that pragmatism is the only way to succeed and it will supersede any idealistic point of views. Not only because idealistic views maintain and represent our life values, but also for the reason that with this idealism, we can see far beyond pragmatism can take us(这句话语法上有问题,觉得beyond后面要加个what,然后take us后面加个to).

First of all, I have to concede that pragmatism is essential in our everyday(daily) lives and is important to our pursuit for(字典上是pursuit of) success. To get a decent job and enjoy a better life in the future, we students have to strive hard to get enough credits that are needed for graduation, and of course, many high school students enter the universities merely for the reason that a bachelor diploma can more often than not guarantee their future career lives. In business area, the main task of a CEO is to increase the profit of the company, and if he(世界上是有两个性别滴,如果判你作文的是女老师,你恐怕会受到惩罚哦~~~) wants to maintain his job, he had better off (double check please,我只知道had better do sth,还有better off这个词组,但是你这种用法没有见过)making his effort to promote every index that the directorate cares for. Pragmatism appears more clearly(我不确定clearly是不是很GRE,可以考虑obvious or apparent) in politics. The reason why a president candidate must win his vote campaign to a great extent not lies(这个lie在这里应该是不合适的,具体用法你可以查一下字典,建议换个词) in his eagerness to fulfill his ideal, but that if he lost, he would also lose his financial support and the future of his political life.

But the importance of pragmatism does not invariably mean that it is the only way to success. Actually, many people have a totally different definition of success(我的版本:each person has his or her unique definition of success). If a person describe(s) success as a life with cars, decent jobs and a great deal of(a great deal of加不可数名次) bank saves(bank deposit), pragmatism seems to be the first staff(员工?) to him because he is living in a material world. But many times(时间可数么?in the most of time,我的版本,不确定正确性,呵呵,sorry) we ask: what is the value of our lives, what is the main difference between we(us) human beings and animals. The answer is clear to most of us: we are humans for we try to fulfill our ideals, not just for survival.你在这里指出了人类与动物的不同在于人类努力实现自己的理想,呵呵,记录一下便于我的分析 We consider Van Gogh a successful artist even though he has no money. His enthusiasm of expressing his conflict(conflicting) thinking in his paintings wins him his long lasting world wide fame. We admire what Xie Hailong, a Chinese journalist, did even though he has no car, no big house. He can be remembered by our descendants because he started the Project Hope, which has subsidized many pool children to finish their education. Most of us have our own ideals, in which(如果是In which的话,这个从句的主语是什么呢?) underlie our life values, and for me, I want(my ideal is) to protect the environment of my country from being polluted.

Even those who only pursue material goals need idealism. In other words, idealism has its own practical merit for existing. Idealism can stimulate people to pursue a more meaningful target. A student with his own ideal will not be confused about his future life when he graduates. Idealism equips people(with) more insightful outlooks. A CEO who cares for the company’s social responsibility will benefit the company more that those who only put their eyes on economic profit.(为啥?不要公司效益,只要社会责任?难服众哦~~~而作者也没有展开说呢) Idealism also let people make up(不要Up) correct judgments and prevents people from making mistakes. During the World War II, it is no doubt that a person who wanted his fame and wealth should run to Hitler and Nazi. 哦?这个观点也很奇特呢,难道想要荣誉和财富的美国人,也应该投靠希特勒?不怕被德国人当俘虏么?But clearly, most of people did not do this because they believe the peace and justice of the world.

From the analysis above, it is safe to draw my conclusion that although we cannot deny that pragmatism is important to succeed in the current real world, idealism has not lost its inherent brilliance. Only by idealism can we go further in our lives.

我不太会拍逻辑上的问题,所以拍了拍语法,一家之言,水平有限,仅供参考~~~
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发表于 2006-2-9 00:24:15 |只看该作者
真的非常感谢兔兔和selina的细心修改,尤其是selina帮我挑出了很多语法错误,这些都是我没有注意到的地方,非常感谢。

1. agree with 是可以加sth.的。Longman:agree with something, to believe that a decision, action, or suggestion is correct or right
2. 第一段的最后一句话是有点问题,但我也不能肯定应该怎么改,只是有印象有类似的说法
3. 是pursuit for,selina真的很细心
4. 是be better off,呵呵,记混了
5. staff 应该是stuff,两个还真的不能搞混得
6. a great deal of, conflict, in which确实是低级语法错误,汗颜,赶紧改

兔兔对我的第二段的评价我想说说我的看法,我第一段的意图是让步的说一下实用主义是非常重要的,为了生存我们必须要现实一点,其实这是一种不得已的接受实用主义。而我也没有在鼓吹实用主义了,因为第三段马上又转折了。所以我不用把实用主义说得有感情了吧:〉

兔兔和salina都对我的倒数第二段有异议,尤其是兔兔提的三个why是非常准确的,我也很想在细化一下,而且也应该细化,但当时时间来不及了,结果就成了历史遗留问题。兔兔还是非常敏锐的。

其实我这段的意思是即使追求实用主义的人也是需要理想主义的。1. 它能使我们明确未来的目标,学生毕业的例子,2. 它能使我们看得更远,CEO,使公司承担其社会责任,其实CEO的职责只是是公司正常运行而已,多赚money,承担社会责任多多少少也算是理想主义把。3. 它让我们做出正确决定, 战争时期是卖国求荣还是坚持正义,其实如果举汪伪政府的例子可能更好,但想想还要给老美看呢。这段当时写的是比较仓促,有些措辞还很不到位。
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发表于 2006-2-9 21:02:45 |只看该作者
呵呵,四年大学都没怎么翻过字典,向来是电子词典就了事了
最近为了GRE,跟砖头般的字典形影不离了~~~
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发表于 2006-2-9 21:27:44 |只看该作者
呵呵,也不一定非要查纸质词典了,我用的词典:

1. 金山词霸,因为能取词,所以用的最多,但说实话用处比较有限
2. babylon, 特别集成了m-w和m-w thesaurus, 原版的两个要分开查,非常不方便,在这里可以一起查。而且还有简明牛津辞典和它的同义词词典和大英百科全书简明版,查同义词和中文翻译都非常有用的
3. Longman, Longman Dictionary of Contempory English,这个词典的界面作的非常漂亮,他的价值在于它大量收集的例句,我如果不确定一个词应该怎样用,就查它,马上就能知道什么表达地道,什么表达不地道。
4. Collins, 各方面都比较平衡,但界面比较差,可作补充

有个网站也比较有用 http://www.chinafanyi.com/index.asp
如果你有表达中文你能说出来,英文你就说不出来,你就用这个网站查吧,能查出最正确的翻译方法。我觉得它做的比金山词霸的主页强

我的存货就这些的。供大家参考,大家也把自己参考了什么说出来啊,分享一下阿
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RE: Issue99 pragmatism & idealism 恳请互拍 [修改]

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