五一twe写作特训------by polymath（欢迎贴作文进来互改）

powerpycUID: 2180236

哇卡卡~你真的~~昨天去喝喜酒？？

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

嘿嘿，拍吧拍吧~有时间的话~

polymathUID: 179557

原帖由 philixcasterliu 于 2006-5-7 16:23 发表
Topic72: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Grades encourage students to learn. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people argue as if it is a gene ...

Topic72: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Grades encourage students to learn. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people argue as if it is a general truth that grades acquired from millions of tests and quizzes by students will spur them to study more industrious and efficient这里两个词都应该用副词形式，industriously and efficiently. But to be frank, I cannot agree with them. There are numerous reasons why I hold no confidence on them and I will explore only a few primary ones here.开头比较新颖，属于先树立靶子，然后批驳，再公布自己的意见。赞！
The main reason with this argument is that it is ignorant to the basic fact that for students, in order to get a higher mark and precede others in appearance, namely trying to be decent, they resort to every expedient especially cheating.好句子！给分点！:o Students who cling to cheat in the exam utterly misunderstand the essence of marks and they contort the real purpose of exams. For one thing, a lot of students show off their high marks in front of others to betray这个词用在这里什么意思？用不定式来表示目的吧！:confused: how sophisticated they are so as to obtain others’ compliment. This is the negative result elicited by the ardor for 个人认为修改成chasing after the high 比较好！marks, in my point of view这一句是多余的废话！.

Another reason why I disagree with the above statement is that I consent that even though students receive a high mark as  their deserved reward, yet hardly will some of them be arrogant about themselves. 论点透彻！These students are more likely to loose their study because of their high grades, asif always, they will lose themselves and penetrate with是不是想表达这个意思！ indulge in playing for a long episode. This kind of phenomenon has existed among many students very often, and definitely influences students at school in a bad side.

What is more, some people convince that scores always help the society select out the real gifted and talented persons to construct our community. However, emphasizing marks too much always lead education to a wrong way, in other words, people should also pay more attention to the competitive abilities of nurturing a qualified talent. As far as I am concerned, student’s students with both adequate knowledge and abilities can do good to us for the sake that knowledge could solve science problems but without basic living abilities, scarcely could people live in the society.

In a word, taking into account of all these factors such as the tendency to cheat among students, the pretentious minds of receiving high marks and the vital role of abilities compared to the scientific knowledge, we may reach the conclusion that marks will not motivate students to study harder.

总评：写的不错，能够基本熟练运用语言和复杂句式进行完整的表达，层次和逻辑比较清楚，措辞方面稍显斟酌，注意语法小错误。5分。

polymathUID: 179557

原帖由 powerpyc 于 2006-5-8 22:07 发表
哇卡卡~你真的~~昨天去喝喜酒？？

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

嘿嘿，拍吧拍吧~有时间的话~

真得呀！呵呵！下午一起玩杀人游戏，头一回当警察，被法官大大得表扬了一番！:lol逻辑分析和判断能力极佳！呵呵！有空一定帮你看，今天估计没时间了！:p

mf1984`UID: 2174556

呵呵，一起加油，有空的帮看看
Topic 7 How do movies and televisions influence people’s behavior?
Hardly can something have more profound influences on people’s lives than movies and televisions. When Charlie Chaplin became the first star on the moving pictures, instead of theatres, he could never imagine how movies and then televisions would give rise to a revolution, whether good or ban, all around the world.

First comes the way people attain information. Books, newspapers, and then radios through which information were spread before soon give way to the rising moving pictures. Nowadays, you can know who won the election, whether the stake in your hand is rising, what does the weather like tomorrow or even which restaurant in the community is the best by turning on a TV set. As TV sets are cheaper and have become an essential part of a house, more and more people choose watching TV as a significant and convenient way to keep being informed. To be illustrated, one may never has a chance to go to the Great Canyon or the Colosseum, now how ha can see it, not in pictures in a book but in vivid videos. The world is changing, so does the method of knowing the world.

Anther facet lies in how people entertain themselves. Several members of a family, couching in sofa, everybody poring on the screen; it is far from an unusual phenomenon. One more example, a boy is more likely to invite a girl to a cinema instead of theatre now. Films and televisions break the restricts of space and time for amusement, and the most important, make it affordable for everybody.

The commercial behavior also underwent a revolution. TV gives company a big chance to make there brand well-known as soon as possible through advertisement. Advertisement, though hated especially by TV watcher, has been existed long before TV sets were invented. However, it was the television that strongly amplified its effect. Coca Cola can not be the No.1 if it has never advertised on TV, so does many famous companies.

Numerous ways can be particularize. To be balance, great changes have taken, and are taking place in our lives because of movies and televisions.

[ 本帖最后由 mf1984` 于 2006-5-8 22:57 编辑 ]

polymathUID: 179557

小苹果，这个名字偶喜欢！先给MM看了！~:D
先看下面几段了，实验室锁门了，:L明接着改吧！！:p

Topic169: people listen to music for different reasons and at different times. why is music important to many people?

I always amazed when I hear people who spend about 70% of their working hours transacting, documenting, and otherwise business saying that they can live admirably without music. Music is at least partly if not wholly the share for of our lives. There are numerous reasons witness my standpoint and here I would explore a few of the most vital ones.首句用两个I不太好，建议变化一下句式和人称形式，比如It always makes me amazed ……:victory:

Look at the posters on the billboard full of news about latter albums 这个和音乐有什么关系？最近的集邮本; or look at the passerby mostly wearing a pair of earphone. Music created by different musicians is to some extent a microcosm of the reflection of experience through our lifetime. Under the interaction of improved music processing and high demand led to the rapid spread of various kinds of music today, it never fail to fascinate human beings. From the dissimilar patterns of music, the different experiences of life we can seek  for. 这一句最好用正装语序吧！意思有点混乱啊！When we wallow of the tunes of the symphony of lives,

powerpycUID: 2180236

原帖由 polymath 于 2006-5-8 22:30 发表

真得呀！呵呵！下午一起玩杀人游戏，头一回当警察，被法官大大得表扬了一番！:lol逻辑分析和判断能力极佳！呵呵！有空一定帮你看，今天估计没时间了！:p

恩，估计是不是歪打正着吖，anyway，UPUP