argument147, fly aw 小组作业

风中尘埃UID: 164965

argument147（411字）

提纲：
开头
1、调查里说，玩家认为游戏最重要的是画面，但这不等于画面好就能卖得好，其他因素会影响销售
2、年轻人喜欢但不一定是最有购买力的
3、需要最先经的电脑可能构成障碍
结尾

In this argument, the author predicts that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next month. To support this prediction, the author cited a survey which shows that the most important feature of a video game to players are the lifelike graphics. Meanwhile, the Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign. This argument is unconvincing for several critical flaws.

The major fallacy with this argument is the misleading survey. The survey, which seemed to support the author's assumption that the video games introduced by Whirlwind recently will reverse the declining sales, is actually provided no concrete evidence about the trend. In the survey, the question asked is what the most important feature in a video game is. The author ignores other possible factors and simply equates this important feature with being best sellers. As we all know, nowadays, the competitions between game companys are severe. So to provide lifelike graphics maybe just the very basic thing rather than a advantage for a company to survive. There are so many factors contribute to the good sales of a video game company, such as the trained sellers, good services after purchase, reasonable prices, etc, which haven't mentioned as important factors in the survey.

In the second place, the arguer fails to provide any evidence that people 10-25 years old will most likely to buy video games. Even it is possible that this age-group is most likely to play video games; one can not deduce that they will become the biggest purchase power from it. From common sense, we know that people at this age may like play game most, but many of them still in short of money to buy what they want. The real purchase power surely doesn’t equate the willingness to pay.

The third flaw weaken this prediction is that the most up-to-date computer which required by the new games introduced in Whirlwind may not available to many players. The most up-to-date sometimes means the most expensive and newly updated. If these requirements are too high to most players, it will be a disadvantage other than an advantage.

In summary, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make the prediction more convincing, the author would have to find out the real factors which hammer the development of the Whirlwind and prove that the newly introduced games will be the best sellers in the next few months.

zqznedUID: 2114587

In this argument, the author predicts that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next month. To support this prediction, the author cited a survey which shows that the most important feature of a video game to players are the lifelike graphics. Meanwhile, the Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign. This argument is unconvincing for several critical flaws.

The major fallacy with this argument is the misleading survey. The survey, which seemed to support the author's assumption that the video games introduced by Whirlwind recently will reverse the declining sales, is actually provided（provides就可以吧） no concrete evidence about the trend. In the survey, the question asked is what the most important feature in a video game is. The author ignores other possible factors and simply equates this important feature with being best sellers. As we all know, nowadays, the competitions between game companys（companies） are severe. So to provide lifelike graphics maybe just the very basic thing rather than a(an) advantage for a company to survive. There are so many factors contribute to the good sales of a video game company, such as the trained sellers, good services after purchase, reasonable prices, etc, which haven't(have not been) mentioned as important factors in the survey.

In the second place, the arguer fails to provide any evidence that people 10-25 years old are most likely to buy video games. Even it is possible that this age-group is most likely to play video games; one can not deduce that they will become the biggest purchase power from it. From common sense, we know that people at this age may like playing games most, but many of them are still in short of money to buy what they want. The real purchase power surely doesn’t equate the willingness to pay.

The third flaw weaken this prediction is that the most up-to-date computer which required by the new games introduced in Whirlwind may not be available to many players. The most up-to-date sometimes means the most expensive and newly updated. If these requirements are too high to most players, it will be a disadvantage other than an advantage.

In summary, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make the prediction more convincing, the author would have to find out the real factors which hammer the development of the Whirlwind and prove that the newly introduced games will be the best sellers in the next few months.
1是游戏本身2是10到25未必会买3是可能太贵        也是合理的
不过大家觉得这里最重要的逻辑错误是哪个呢？
就是必须该有的那个理由

zqznedUID: 2114587

怎么才有红字啊？变成黑的不爽

风中尘埃UID: 164965

用那个软件，在寄托上搜一下作文修改工具就能找到

风中尘埃UID: 164965

最重要的还是那个lifelike graphic吧，毕竟逻辑关系最清楚的，就是这个，讲得最多的也还是这个

zqznedUID: 2114587

那那个下降的原因呢？

kckUID: 2214868

The major fallacy with[in?不确定怎么用，查下吧] this argument is the misleading survey. The survey, which seemed to support the author's assumption that the video games introduced by Whirlwind recently will reverse the declining sales, is actually provided[加个with?这里是说survey没提供 evidence还是在no evidence的情况下提供survey?] no concrete evidence about the trend. In the survey, the question asked is what the most important feature in a video game is. [可以加个however加强语气]The author ignores other possible factors and simply equates this important feature with being best sellers. As we all know, nowadays, the competitions between game companys[companies] are severe. So to provide lifelike graphics maybe just the very basic thing rather than a[an] advantage for a company to survive. There are so many factors contribute to the good sales of a video game company, such as the trained sellers, good services after purchase, reasonable prices, etc, which haven't mentioned as important factors in the survey.

In the second place, the arguer fails to provide any evidence that people 10-25 years old will most likely to buy video games. Even it is possible that this age-group is most likely to play video games; one can not deduce that they will become the biggest purchase power from it. From common sense, we know that people at this age may like play game most, but many of them[are] still in short of money to buy what they want. The real purchase power surely doesn’t equate the willingness to pay.

The third flaw weaken this prediction is that the most up-to-date computer which required by the new games introduced in Whirlwind may not available to many players. The most up-to-date sometimes[always?] means the most expensive and newly updated. If these requirements are too high to most players, it will be a disadvantage other than an advantage.

In summary, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make the prediction more convincing, the author would have to find out the real factors which hammer the development of the Whirlwind and prove that the newly introduced games will be the best sellers in the next few months.

[几点都很好，展开也不错，我觉得开头可否先是仅仅简单综述下，然后再展开批驳。这样结构就清晰点]

[ 本帖最后由 kck 于 2006-5-18 19:22 编辑 ]

kckUID: 2214868

下降的原因并没有提到吧..也可以作为批驳
但我觉得主要的点还是:lifelike graphic 时候真的能促进销售,包括广告是否合理,10-25岁的是否真的会看重而购买

zqznedUID: 2114587

lifelike graphic能促销
广告能提高业绩
针对１０－２５是否有用
基本同意kck，把原文中提到的，最直接的错误错误提出来应该是很重要的

exp03UID: 2158827

你还没交改过的作业

honeyviolaUID: 2199703

In this argument, the author predicts that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next month. To support this prediction, the author cited a survey which shows that the most important feature of a video game to players are the lifelike graphics. Meanwhile, the Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign. This argument is unconvincing for several critical flaws.

The major fallacy with this argument is the misleading survey. The survey, which seemed如果改用一般时态可以吗， to support the author's assumption that the video games introduced by Whirlwind recently will reverse the declining sales, is actually provided no concrete evidence about the trend. In the survey, the question asked is what the most important feature in a video game is. The author ignores other possible factors may promote the sales and simply equates this important feature with being去掉Being呢？ best sellers. As we all know, nowadays, the competitions between game companys are severe. So to provide lifelike graphics maybe just the very basic thing rather than a advantage for a company to survive. There are so many factors contribute to the good sales of a video game company, such as the trained sellers, good services after purchase, reasonable prices, etc, which haven't mentioned as important factors in the survey.

In the second place, the arguer fails to provide any evidence that people 10-25 years old will most likely to buy video games. Even it is possible that this age-group is most likely to play video games;.one can not deduce that they will become the biggest purchase power from it. From common sense, we know that people at this age may like playing game most, but many of them are still in short of money to buy what they want. The real purchase power surely doesn’t equate the willingness to pay.

The third flaw weaken  this prediction is that the most up-to-date computer which required by the new games introduced in Whirlwind may not available to many players. The most up-to-date sometimes means the most expensive and newly updated. If these requirements are too high to most players, it will be a disadvantage other than an advantage.

In summary, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make the prediction more convincing, the author would have to find out the real factors which hammer the development of the Whirlwind and prove that the newly introduced games will be the best sellers in the next few months.

结构清晰，语句通畅，继续努力啊！

风中尘埃UID: 164965

The major fallacy with this argument is the misleading survey. The survey, which seems to support the author's assumption that the video games introduced by Whirlwind recently will reverse the declining sales, actually provided no concrete evidence about the change of the trend. In the survey, the question asked is what the most important feature in a video game is. However the author ignores other possible factors may promote the sales and simply equates this important feature with being best sellers. As we all know, nowadays, the competitions between game companies are bitterly severe. So providing lifelike graphics maybe the very basic thing for a company to survive rather than an advantage. There are so many factors contribute to the good sales of a video game company, such as the trained sellers, good services after purchase, reasonable prices, etc, which haven't mentioned as important factors in the survey.

In the second place, the arguer fails to provide any evidence that people 10-25 years old will most likely to buy video games. Even it is possible that this age-group is most likely to play video games; one can not deduce that they will become the biggest purchase power from it. From common sense, we know that people at this age may like play game most, but many of them are still in short of money to buy what they want. The real purchase power surely doesn’t equate the willingness to pay.

The third flaw weaken this prediction is that the most up-to-date computer which required by the new games introduced in Whirlwind may not available to many players. The most up-to-date always means the most expensive and newly updated. If these requirements are too high to most players, it will be a disadvantage other than an advantage.

In summary, the conclusion reached in this argument is invalid and misleading. To make the prediction more convincing, the author would have to find out the real factors which hamper the development of the Whirlwind and prove that the newly introduced games will be the best sellers in the next few months.