issue7 FLY AW第三次作业！

exp03UID: 2158827

Issue7 The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records.
1.        As recording methods, video camera records and written records have their own advantages.
2.        Video camera records are superior in note physical characters and can store much more data than written records.
3.        Written records always give out accurate physiologic situations and are used wider than the expensive video camera method.
4.        The two methods fit to record different aspects to show their primary characteristics.

In contemporary life, the rapidly change in the society needs to be recorded as a property to the offspring. With the development of the technology, different recording methods appear quickly. So people state giving attention the debate of which method is superior than another. In my opinion, as recording methods, video camera records and written records have their own advantages.

Video camera records can exactly note physical characters and easily store much more data than written records. With the help of video camera, now we can record every impress of the surrounding things actually, not as indetermination as written records. First of all, the voice, color, acts and the response of interrelated things can be recorded at the same time and make a vivid impress on the audiences’ minds. What is more, some actions, hardly seem by biologic eyes, are captured by video cameras. These records are even more wealth for people to understand our nature than the not exactly describe on books. On the other hand, depicted by video camera numerous data can be stored safer and longer than books especially in the modern information booming society.

While even video camera records is useful in many parts, we can not ignore the functions of written records, which always give out accurate physiologic situations and are used wider than the expensive video camera method. One thing must be admitted, we can not actually imagine the mentality of people by watching the pictures. But written records with criticism can easily solve this problem. Mind is the soul of people’s history. The written records can perfect the records on characterize the thought of the humanity. And in modern society, video camera is still a costly tool for everyman. Thus written records have to act as the foremost recording manner to most of times. We also can conclude that video camera records often record the life of rich people but not explore lives of the poor, so it can not comprise the actual situation of the lives of the whole world.   

The two methods fit to record different aspects to show their primary characteristics. We should choose the proper wise or use both wise in especial needs. In this way, we can make the most accurate and convincing record of things.
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夜一UID: 2130338

总体的文章思路清楚，结构也很清晰，是一篇相当不错的issue了，也没挑出什么语法毛病来
如果要挑毛病的话，那就是论述的深度还不够，举例的时候多数是浅尝辄止，没有向下挖进去，而第三段里提到的花费问题，我个人认为如果有别的话来说的话，就尽量不要往钱上面扯，这个支撑总是比较弱的，题目是more important，不是more economical。
另外结尾的部分要强调一下，不少人喜欢加一个we should怎样怎样，我个人是不赞成的，事实性的题目，最好还是不要加上倾向性的结论，有点画蛇添足的感觉，万一说得不好，被扣上跑题的嫌疑就划不来了

exp03UID: 2158827

谢谢夜一的修改，早晨一个小时多一点写完的这篇issue，可能是题目简单的原因写起来比上次顺手多了。但是之前还是花了长时间去找两种各自的好处，总的来说自己觉得比前一篇有进步。
但是由于语言的原因感觉很多地方都表达不出来，尤其是不能举例需要论述的地方。所以夜一看出很多时候都浅尝辄止。
还有感觉这种两方面都有优点的写法的结尾不很好写，主要是一旦说两方面都好，就感觉没比较。所以我想用一个号召式的结尾来表明不同情况分别处理，可惜又表达得不好……
还有就是感觉字数上不够……

[ 本帖最后由 exp03 于 2006-5-23 14:09 编辑 ]

exp03UID: 2158827

夜一说我写的钱的方面不好，说如果有其他可说的就尽量不要扯到钱上。但我觉得这是可以说得能说服人的一个地方。但我的思路跟你不一样，我是从录像基本上都是记录的富人的生活，穷人因为用不起这种记录工具在这个时代下他们的life就不能被记录下来，因此影响了录像对生活记录的accurate.

夜一UID: 2130338

我觉得不能这么说吧
记录在很大程度上不是靠被记录的人本身，而是靠去记录的人
买不起摄影机不等于不被记录，买得起纸和笔也不等于自己就会记录自己，我觉得将两者等同是一个逻辑上的误区，动物们植物们根本就不会读书写字，不也一样被记录下来了么？
而且所谓accurate指得是没有错误，并非指面面俱到
我的理解，摄影机的纪录，客观性，真实性，具体性，细节性，都是毋庸置疑的，而相比之下，纸笔的记录就有主观性，简略性，看起来是缺点，实际上却正是纸笔记录不可缺少的原因。在我认为，这是两种完全不同的东西，根本不存在可比性，谈不上哪个比哪个重要。

zqznedUID: 2114587

我看了一下，写得不错，比上一次进步多了。
我也建议不要写钱，文章的着眼点在两种方式的比较上，是人愿意用什么，不是人的条件被限定。

exp03UID: 2158827

嗯 明白你们的意思了 今晚再改

exp03UID: 2158827

In contemporary life, the rapidly change in the society needs to be recorded as a property to the offspring. With the development of the technology, different recording methods appear quickly. So people state giving attention the debate of which method is superior than another. In my opinion, as recording methods, video camera records and written records have their own advantages.

Video camera records can exactly note physical characters and easily store much more data than written records. With the help of video camera, now we can record every impress of the surrounding things actually, not as indetermination as written records. First of all, people can hardly use a pen and a piece of paper to depict a vivid impress on one’s minds. If we want to record the happy time we spend with our family, we can try to answer the question how to incarnate the true voice of each member, how to describe the actions happening in the same time, and how to appearance the response of interrelated things. Using video camera, all these parts can be simultaneity display. What is more, some actions, hardly seem by biologic eyes, are captured by video cameras, such as the flower blowing, the water freezing, and the animal mating. These records are even more wealth for people to understand our nature than the not exactly describe on books. On the other hand, depicted by video camera numerous data can be stored safer and longer than books especially in the modern information booming society.

While even video camera records is useful in many parts, we can not ignore the functions of written records, which always give out accurate purpose and psychology are used wider than the  video camera method. One thing must be admitted, we can only see the psychosis of a person on the pictures but can not actually imagine the inner truth of a reality. But written records with criticism can easily solve this problem. Mind is the soul of people’s history. The written records can perfect the records on characterizing the thought of the humanity. And in modern society, video camera is still a costly tool for everyman. Thus written records have to act as the foremost recording manner to most of times. We also can conclude that video camera records often record the life of rich people but not explore lives of the poor, so it can not comprise the actual situation of the lives of the whole world.   

The two methods fit to record different aspects to show their primary characteristics. We should choose the proper wise or use both wise in especial needs. In this way, we can make the most accurate and convincing record of things.
改了一半 写不下去了 一会再改

[ 本帖最后由 exp03 于 2006-5-24 08:54 编辑 ]

flycc28UID: 2164453

文章越来越成熟的说：）

很同意夜一的观点：最好不要在文章里用到i thing, i believe之类的词，尽量客观。

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