Issue51 清凉夏日三组第一次I的作业

domothyUID: 2224019

说明一下这篇是我写的第一篇Issue，然后朋友帮我改过，然后我又自己在改过。现在布置到这个题目，我就拿出来再让大家帮我看看啦
呵呵，谢过先～

Issue51: 336 words(时间到的时候)
Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.

syllabus:
1.Interest plays an important role in learning, we should provide opportunities to students to develop their interest.
2.Design a system of education that caters every individual's interest is idealistic ,but our school is trying their best.
3. we are responsible for our own development

  The function of education is not only teaching students knowledge, but also encouraging the students to have their own thoughts and creative ideas. It is crucial for every student to develop his or her own interest in the process of learning to become creative. However we cannot count only on education system to meet the requirements, students are also responsible for their own development.

  As the old saying goes(as I paraphrase): “Interest is the greatest teacher. The one who is interested in the subjects will perform better and in a more efficient way than those who are compelled to do so. If something intrigues a person, it is natural for him/her to spend more time and more energy on it, as a result he/she will get more information and understand it better. Thus interest plays a crucial part in the process of learning. We should cultivate the students’ interest in study, and provide the circumstance in which the students could further develop their interests.

  However, designing a system of education that caters individual needs and interests of each students is unrealistic. The purpose of education is to cultivate responsible and capable citizens. And it should be designed to give every child the opportunity to study. Therefore developing a curriculum and a standard of evaluation to meet these requirements is the first and most important problem out education system seek to address. Because the limit resource,such as the funding from the government which is still not enough nowadays, and the number of qualified teachers,, the system has to focus on imparting basic knowledge as well as molding the morality of the students. However, our teachers know the importance of developing students’ interests. They have done their best to provide us with a better and more interest-oriented environment with the limited resources. For example, the optional courses at school give us opportunities to develop interest outside our major or dig deeper in the field we’re interested in; the library give us access to the whole set of knowledge on the subjects our interests lie in.

  We, students, should take responsibility of our own development. As we learned the basic knowledge and the methods of study at school, we could develop our interests by ourselves, especially we still can get enormous help from schools. The teachers are all willing to help us when we encounter difficulties in study; to point us the right way to go when we are lost our direction. We can also get countless materials in every aspect we are interested in from the libraries at school. Our classmates are good companies along the way to pursuing our goals.

  In sum, we should use the plentiful resources the education system provide us with, to develop our own interests, learn as much as we can, prepare ourselves a integral and sagacious people who are ready to contribute to build a better society.

helenlhhUID: 2127690

syllabus:
1.Interest plays an important role in learning, we should provide opportunities to students to develop their interest.
2.Design a system of education that caters every individual's interest is idealistic ,but our school is trying their best.
3. we are responsible for our own development

  The function of education is not only teaching students knowledge, but also encouraging the students to have their own thoughts and creative ideas. It is crucial for every student to develop his or her own interest in the process of learning to become creative. However we cannot count only on education system to meet the requirements, students are also responsible for their own development.

  As the old saying goes(as I paraphrase): “Interest is the greatest teacher. The one who is interested in the subjects will perform better and in a more efficient way than those who are compelled to do so. If something intrigues a person, it is natural for him/her to spend more time and more energy on it, as a result he/she will get more information and understand it better. Thus interest plays a crucial part in the process of learning. We should cultivate the students’ interest in study, and provide the circumstance in which the students could further develop their interests.

  However, designing a system of education that caters individual needs and interests of each students is unrealistic. The purpose of education is to cultivate responsible and capable citizens. And it should be designed to give every child the opportunity to study. Therefore developing a curriculum and a standard of evaluation to meet these requirements is the first and most important problem out education system seek to address.(这句话有点问题，我也不太明白你是什么意思) Because the limit resource,such as the funding from the government which is still not enough nowadays, and the number of qualified teachers,, the system has to focus on imparting basic knowledge as well as molding the morality of the students. However, our teachers know the importance of developing students’ interests. They have done their best to provide us with a better and more interest-oriented environment with the limited resources. For example, the optional courses at school give us opportunities to develop interest outside our major or dig deeper in the field we’re interested in; the library give us access to the whole set of knowledge on the subjects our interests lie in.

  We, students, should take responsibility of our own development. As we learned the basic knowledge and the methods of study at school, we could develop our interests by ourselves, especially we still can get enormous help from schools. The teachers are all willing to help us when we encounter difficulties in study; to point us the right way to go when we are lost our direction. We can also get countless materials in every aspect we are interested in from the libraries at school. Our classmates are good companies along the way to pursuing our goals.

  In sum, we should use the plentiful resources the education system provide us with, to develop our own interests, learn as much as we can, prepare ourselves a integral and sagacious people who are ready to contribute to build a better society.

你的文章有一个特点就是思路清晰，看起来很清爽。继续保持

这篇文章你还要重新考虑一下，你的论点都行，但三个大段全是只有陈述，你没有采用比较有效的论证方法去支持你的观点，但这些东西是ETS希望看到的，你至少要举点例子去说服他一下。

关于论证的问题，我们组的学习交流贴上我写过一些，可以去看看。

加油！:victory:

[ 本帖最后由 helenlhh 于 2006-7-20 15:37 编辑 ]