issue150 graduate06--Hamming组 冲刺第1篇

graduate06UID: 2223299

150. "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."
由于电视和全球范围内的计算机网络，人们现在可以熟悉很多以前从未涉足过的地方。其结果就是使得旅游变得过时了。
(旅游将会被淘汰)

立场：有保留的反对
outline:
1 承认，电视和电脑可以使人们足不出户就欣赏各地风光
2 但是，人们旅游不单单是为了去看风景，可能去放松，调节
3 电视和电脑非但没有削弱反而促进了旅游发展

WORDS: 493      TIME: 50:00       DATE: 2007-1-15

Can the television and computer replace tourism? According to the speaker the answer is yes. I agree with the speaker that television and computer are an important means of knowing different resorts because it provides vivid and accurate record of scenes. However, I think the speaker understates the significant impact that the tourism has had on our life.

     Admittedly the television and computer can provide accurate, vivid images of natural and artificial scenes, it facilitates people to watch the beautiful resorts of the world. For instance, we could watch the fascinating aurora, the largest waterfall in the world, Niagara Falls, or the magnificent coral in the Great Barrier Reef through the images on our television or computers. In this aspect, people really can see the beautiful sceneries through the computer and TV set instead of the travelling.

     However, the speaker fails to examine the other advantages of tourism. For one thing, it is not only to see the waterfall or great mountines but to have a rest or experience the local custorms. For example, many citizens now would like to go natural forest for rest their overwhelmed hearts. As the statement said we can see the green lawns and springs on the screen, so we have no need to take pains to spend a long time and so much money to see them personally. The speaker fails to take the real reason that why people go travelling into consideration. Common sense tells me that some people go travelling just for viewing the beautiful landscape, but some other people just want to have a rest or release pressure. For these people, the pure images of the television cannot satisfy their needs.   

Moreover, television or computer not only cannot affect people’s travelling but also promote the development of tourism. Due to people can watch the beautiful scenes on the TV and find where they are interested in on the Internet. They can get much more information about where is the most attractive places to play, and they can preview the beautiful vistas they would like to go to then decide whether or not to view them personally. Before the television was invented, people only can get such information through the book or newspaper, with the development of network, many travelling company and resorts open their websites on the Internet to facilitate people to understand them and go to view the beautiful landscape. In this sense, the travelling is promoted by the high tech such as the television, computer network.

In sum, just to watch the beautiful scenes computer and television is good enough. Thus, the statement is correct in this respect. Yet, if one needs to travel for rest or experience the local conditions and customs, he or her will not satisfy the mere images on the screen.  So, travelling will always be needed to help us to rest or release pressures and find funs in live, and never be shadowed by computer or television.

字数少了些，会再充实例子的。

[ 本帖最后由 graduate06 于 2007-1-16 00:03 编辑 ]

tomato217UID: 2126636

1 承认，电视和电脑可以使人们足不出户就欣赏各地风光
2 但是，人们旅游不单单是为了去看风景，可能去放松，调节
3 电视和电脑非但没有削弱反而促进了旅游发展[这点想得好]

WORDS: 493      TIME: 50:00       DATE: 2007-1-15

Can the television and computer replace tourism? According to the speaker the answer is yes. I agree with the speaker that television and computer are an important means of knowing different resorts because it[they] provides vivid and accurate record[-s] of scenes. However, I think the speaker understates the significant impact that the tourism has had on our life.

     Admittedly the television and computer can provide accurate, vivid images of natural and artificial scenes,[断句] it facilitates people to watch the beautiful resorts of the world. For instance, we could watch the fascinating aurora, the largest waterfall in the world, Niagara Falls, or the magnificent coral in the Great Barrier Reef through the images on our television or computers. In this aspect, people really can see the beautiful sceneries through the computer and TV set instead of the travelling.

     However, the speaker fails to examine the other[前面一直在说television and computer，这段跳到tourism，哪来的other？] advantages of tourism. For one thing, it is not only to see the waterfall or great mountines[mountains] but to have a rest or experience the local custorms[customs]. For example, many citizens now would like to go [to] natural forest for rest[-ing] their overwhelmed hearts. As the statement said we can see the green lawns and springs on the screen, so we have no need to take pains to spend a long time and so much money to see them personally. The speaker fails to take the real reason that why people go travelling into consideration. Common sense tells me that some people go travelling just for viewing the beautiful landscape, but some other people just want to have a rest or release pressure.[这句在重复第2句，第二句del] For these people, the pure images of the television cannot satisfy their needs.   

Moreover,[不必要，本句本来就起承接作用] television or computer not only cannot[套得很别扭，on the contrary更好] affect people’s travelling but also promote the development of tourism. Due to people can watch the beautiful scenes on the TV and find where they are interested in on the Internet[主句呢？]. They can get much more information about where is the most attractive places[is+复数] to play, and they can preview the beautiful vistas they would like to go to then decide whether or not to view them personally. Before the television was invented, people only can get such information through the book or newspaper[-s],[断句] with the development of network, many travelling company and resorts open their websites on the Internet to facilitate people to understand them and go to view the beautiful landscape. In this sense, the travelling is promoted by the high tech such as the television, computer network.

In sum, just to watch the beautiful scenes computer and television is[are] good enough. Thus, the statement is correct in this respect. Yet, if one needs to travel for rest or experience the local conditions and customs, he or her will not satisfy the mere images on the screen.  So, travelling will always be needed to help us to rest or release pressures and find funs in live[lives], and never be shadowed by computer or television.

tomato217UID: 2126636

ft~~~标的颜色都被过滤掉了！！！

graduate06UID: 2223299

没事，你发我邮箱吧，womenzai2003@yahoo.com
我等下改你的，你急着回住的地方了，我现在就该你的

graduate06UID: 2223299

原帖由 tomato217 于 2007-1-17 19:48 发表

Moreover,[不必要，本句本来就起承接作用] television or computer not only cannot[套得很别扭，on the contrary更好] affect people’s travelling but also promote the development of tourism.

WORDS: 493      TIME: 50:00       DATE: 2 ...

多谢你的建议，这句话写的时候就觉得不是很好。

[前面一直在说television and computer，这段跳到tourism，哪来的other？]

这个地方的确是过渡的不自然，让读者觉得突兀了。