issue154 [米国有米] 1.29 望拍

绚烂夏花UID: 2245298

TOPIC: ISSUE154 - "Both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools. Education is too important to leave solely to a group of professional educators."
WORDS: 501          TIME: 0:45:00          DATE: 2007-1-30
提纲
一，总括，三者都有作用，但是专业教育者承担主要责任
二，分述三者的作用
三，为何专业教育者责任更重
四，总结

Education is so significant to our society because it determined what our future generations will be like. Therefore, the three factors involved in cultivating our children--parents, communities and professional educators--all together should be taken into account in education in order to make the most of their functions. Nevertheless, professional educators should take the leading role in the progress given their special status in education system.

Why all the three factors should be involved in education?
First let's take a look of parents. Parents are not only the first but also the lifelong teacher of all the children. They are expected to have the greatest impact in the formation of children's characteristics, say personal values, disciplines, moral virtues and so on. For everybody, the most impressive and the most vivid lesson is from the parents. What's more, time changes but the parents and child relationship remains the same. The influence from parents is so great that it will last though one’s whole life.
Secondly, communities are also responsible for the education of children considering that the communities provide relevantly the whole living environment for children. Besides, some organizations in the communities would raise money to help those who cannot offer the education fee, which makes great sense for the poor.
And when we consider the functions of professional educators, we will have no difficulty defining their significance. With scientific and well designed education methods and necessary equipments, professional educators can meet the needs of most students and teach more effectively.

Then there comes the question why professional educators should take the leading role in education.
To answer the question we should take a more careful look of the parents-oriented education. Parents, as can be seen, all want to provide the best to their children and usually it is parents who know best what is most needed for their children. Nevertheless, sometimes they even don't have any idea about how to cultivate their children effectively. Partially because they are not trained  to be professional and thoughtful , also, out of pride and ego, parents tend to overlook the children's shortages or they might  push children too hard to learn because they expect excessively of their children, as a result of which there are no winners but victims. Worse still, with the increasing number of two-income families, parents have less and less time to focus on the teaching of their children.
Move on to communities. Communities are important to provide safe and comfortable atmosphere for children living there. But community cannot take the most responsibility because they lack essential equipments for education such as labs and faculties specially designed for teaching.
As a result, professional educator, with much precious teaching experiences and professional skills, can offer the most suitable education towards most students, no matter whom they are and where they are from.

In conclusion, education is so important that it calls for parents, communities as well as professional educator to participate in it. However , consider the advantages and disadvantages of each part, professional educator should come first and take the leading role.

pipifenfenUID: 2292582

因为昨天我的帖子出了点问题，所以今天才刚开始改
可能会比较晚提交修改后的文章，请见谅阿

pipifenfenUID: 2292582

Education is so significant to our society because it determined what our future generations will be like. Therefore, the three factors involved in cultivating our children--parents, communities and professional educators--all together should be taken into account in education in order to make the most of their functions. Nevertheless, professional educators should take the leading role in the progress given their special status in education system. [这句感觉有点怪，最好改一下]

Why all the three factors should be involved in education? [觉得最好加强一下主体句，这三者应该都参与，然后说为什么都参与呢？]
First let's take a look of parents. Parents are not only the first but also the lifelong teacher of all the children. They are expected to have the greatest impact in改一下，父母本来就有影响，什么叫期望有这样的影响？ the formation of children's characteristics, say[我总觉得用say不太好] personal values, disciplines, moral virtues and so on. For everybody, the most impressive and the most vivid lesson is from the parents. What's more, time changes but the parents and child relationship remains the same. The influence from parents is so great that it will last though one’s whole life.
Secondly, communities are also responsible for the education of children considering that the communities provide relevantly the whole living environment for children. Besides, some organizations in the communities would raise money to help those who cannot offer the education fee, which makes great sense for the poor.[这个想法很好，我就没有想到]
And when we consider the functions of professional educators, we will have no difficulty defining their significance. With scientific and well designed education methods and necessary equipments, professional educators can meet the needs of most students and teach more effectively.[觉得如果能举个例子会更好]

Then there comes the question why professional educators should take the leading role in education.
To answer the question we should take a more careful look of the parents-oriented education. Parents, as can be seen, all want to provide the best to their children and usually it is parents who know best what is most needed for their children. Nevertheless, sometimes they even don't have any idea about how to cultivate their children effectively. Partially because they are not trained  to be professional and thoughtful , also, out of pride and ego, parents tend to overlook the children's shortages or they might  push children too hard to learn because they expect excessively of their children,[加一句，结果孩子就反抗，逆反，专做坏事什么的，违反了初衷] as a result of which there are no winners but victims. Worse still, with the increasing number of two-income families, parents have less and less time to focus on the teaching of their children.
Move on to communities. Communities are important to provide safe and comfortable atmosphere for children living there. But community cannot take the most responsibility because they lack essential equipments for education such as labs and faculties specially designed for teaching.
As a result, [最好写一句，通过上面的论证什么的]professional educator, with much precious teaching experiences and professional skills, can offer the most suitable education towards most students, no matter whom they are and where they are from.

In conclusion, education is so important that it calls for parents, communities as well as professional educator to participate in it. However , consider the advantages and disadvantages of each part, professional educator should come first and take the leading role.

感觉转承启合方面不太好，能够多用一些信号词则更好。而且很多说理都只停留在表面，如果能深入会好一些，不一定非得面面俱到。不过所说道理范围都比较广。这是我的拙见，不知道是否正确。

绚烂夏花UID: 2245298

多谢！