issue130【076G－背水一战小组】jw84第一次作业

jw84UID: 2283839

Issue130
  The speaker asserts that the destiny of society is determined by how children are socialized.It is ture that children's socialization is vital to the development children,as well as the future of our society,but we cannot overlook other factors in the children education.Besides, I hold that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society.

  First of all, socialization of children plays an important role in the development of our soceity. John Milton once said:"The childhood shows the man,as morning shows the day." Undoubtedly,children is the future backbone of our society, whose wholesome development serves as a pillar for society's prosperity.And as an necessary component of children's growing process, socialization of children means how the children interact with other people and what's situation they are exposed.Without the healthy interaction with peers, child may feel isolated and helpless,especially when they confront with frustration.If the children could be properly socialized since their childhood, they could attain the realistic social experience and knowledge that how to negotiate and cooperate.Further more, socialization of children also help children to be cognizant of their responsibility to the society,as well as the society value such as moral vaules and ethical principles.

  However, other factors,like intellectual education and personality, are also important when we raise children for the progress of our society.To understand this point well,one needs to look no further than Nash,one of the Nobel Prize owner.Exculsive from the mundane world and not well socialized with other people,Nash is indulged and immerse in his scientific field with diligence,concentration and tolerance and makes great contribution to the society.This example illustrates that socialization won't totally determine the destiny the person and the society.Actually,as we know,Nash did not lead a happy life due a great part to lack of the communication with other people.Probably he would gain more economic achievements if his childhood had been given proper socialization.

  Fortunately,people have realized the importance of the socialization of the children,however,we still have not yet learnt how to raise children who can better society.Both the family and the school play a virtal role in socialization.On the one hand,many parents fail to set up a good example to their children.The family quarrels and even family violence put a bad influence on the growth of their children.In some traditonal culture like China,parents always indulge their children,and satisfy their many demands.Unfortunately, most parents have not realize the bad effect of spoiling kids. Besides, nowadays more and more TV programs are filled with taking drugs, homosexuality and pornographic contexts,that directly leads the children to have a negative attitudes towards the society.On the other hand, the school education emphasizes too much on the intellectual cultivation and overlooks the significant function of the emotional education.Only by setting more curriculums and programs to help students promote their social ability will the students easily adapt for the complex society after graduation. Nevertheless，our human society has been changing all the time ,so is the way how children have raised in order to bring about a better society.

  In sum, although children's socialization plays a hinge role in their development,it is not the sole factor. On the other hand, in order to guarantee our society's prosperity, it is high time we spare no effort to build up an active environment to facilitate children's balanced development.

SkysijieUID: 2233317

Issue130
  The speaker asserts that the destiny of society is determined by how children are socialized.It is ture（true） that children's socialization is vital to the development(加个of) children,as well as the future of our society,but we cannot overlook other factors in the children education.Besides, I hold （hold的什么东西，写全）that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society.（开篇不错，即概括了题目，也提出自己的观点）

  First of all, socialization of children plays an important role in the development of our soceity. John Milton once said:"The childhood shows the man,as morning shows the day." Undoubtedly,children is（are） the future backbone of our society, whose wholesome development serves as a pillar for society's prosperity(我觉得这句话改为“undoubtedly, children, whose wholesome ... prosperity, are the ...society.”这样好些).And as an necessary component of children's growing process, socialization of children means how the children interact with other people and what's situation they are exposed.Without the healthy interaction with peers, child may feel isolated and helpless,especially when they confront with frustration.If the children could be properly socialized since their childhood, they could attain the realistic social experience and knowledge that how to negotiate and cooperate.Further more, socialization of children also help children to be cognizant of their responsibility to the society,as well as the society value such as moral vaules and ethical principles.（这段的论证不错，但是对于“儿童的健康对社会很重要”和“儿童的社会化对社会很重要”这两者间有什么关系没太明白，能解释一下吗）

  However, other factors,like intellectual education and personality, are also important when we raise children （加个up） for the progress of our society.To understand this point well,one needs to look no further than Nash,one of the Nobel Prize owner.Exculsive(exclusive) from the mundane world and not well socialized with other people,Nash is indulged and immerse （这两个词用的挺好，学习一下^-^）in his scientific field with diligence,concentration and tolerance and makes great contribution to the society.(好长的句子)This example illustrates that socialization won't totally determine the destiny (加of)the person and the society.Actually,as we know,Nash did not lead a happy life due a great part to(很喜欢用这个短语哦) lack of the communication with other people.Probably he would gain more economic achievements if his childhood had been given proper socialization.（这段论证的是intellectual在儿童的教育中的重要性，但是为什么要在最后说没有社会化的坏处呢？？）

  Fortunately,people have realized the importance of the socialization of the （去掉）children,however,we still have not yet learnt how to raise children who can better society(没有见过这种表达).Both the family and the school play a virtal role in socialization.On the one hand,many parents fail to set up a good example to their children.The family quarrels and even family violence put a bad influence on the growth of their children.In some traditonal culture like China,parents always indulge their children,and satisfy their many demands.Unfortunately, most parents have not realize the bad effect of spoiling kids. Besides, nowadays more and more TV programs are filled with taking drugs, homosexuality and pornographic contexts,that directly leads the children to have a negative attitudes towards the society.On the other hand, the school education emphasizes too much on the intellectual cultivation and overlooks the significant function of the emotional education.Only by setting more curriculums and programs to help students promote their social ability will the students easily adapt for the complex society after graduation. Nevertheless，our human society has been changing all the time ,so is the way how children have raised in order to bring about a better society.

  In sum, although children's socialization plays a hinge role in their development,it is not the sole factor. On the other hand, in order to guarantee our society's prosperity, it is high time we spare no effort to build up an active environment to facilitate children's balanced development.
（感觉还是逻辑有点乱，多看看范文，应该会有不小的收获。加油！）

yangbay8UID: 2277107

Issue130
  The speaker asserts that the destiny of society is determined by how children are socialized.It is ture that children's socialization is vital to the development children,as well as the future of our society,but we cannot overlook other factors in the children education.Besides, I hold that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society.

  First of all, socialization of children plays an important role in the development of our soceity. John Milton once said:"The childhood shows the man,as morning shows the day." Undoubtedly,children is the future backbone of our society, whose wholesome development serves as a pillar for society's prosperity.And as an necessary component of children's growing process, socialization of children means how the children interact with other people and what's situation they are exposed.Without the healthy interaction with peers, child may feel isolated and helpless,especially when they confront with frustration.If the children could be properly socialized since their childhood, they could attain the realistic social experience and knowledge that how to negotiate and cooperate.Further more, socialization of children also help children to be cognizant of their responsibility to the society,as well as the society value such as moral vaules and ethical principles.

  However, other factors,like intellectual education and personality, are also important when we raise children for the progress of our society.To understand this point well,one needs to look no further than Nash,one of the Nobel Prize owner.Exculsive from the mundane world and not well socialized with other people,Nash is indulged and immerse in his scientific field with diligence,concentration and tolerance and makes great contribution to the society.This example illustrates that socialization won't totally determine the destiny the person and the society.Actually,as we know,Nash did not lead a happy life due a great part to lack of the communication with other people.Probably he would gain more economic achievements if his childhood had been given proper socialization.（纳什的思想不能用我们常人思想去理解，也许他自己很快乐，也许他并不认为缺少沟通，个人认为改成因为交流少，他的思想不好表达出来比较好）
  Fortunately,people have realized the importance of the socialization of the children,however,we still have not yet learnt how to raise children who can better society.Both the family and the school play a virtal role in socialization.On the one hand,many parents fail to set up a good example to their children.The family quarrels and even family violence put a bad influence on the growth of their children.In some traditonal culture like China,parents always indulge their children,and satisfy their many demands.Unfortunately, most parents have not realize the bad effect of spoiling kids. Besides, nowadays more and more TV programs are filled with taking drugs, homosexuality and pornographic contexts,that directly leads the children to have a negative attitudes towards the society.On the other hand, the school education emphasizes too much on the intellectual cultivation and overlooks the significant function of the emotional education.Only by setting more curriculums and programs to help students promote their social ability will the students easily adapt for the complex society after graduation. Nevertheless，our human society has been changing all the time ,so is the way how children have raised in order to bring about a better society.

  In sum, although children's socialization plays a hinge role in their development,it is not the sole factor. On the other hand, in order to guarantee our society's prosperity, it is high time we spare no effort to build up an active environment to facilitate children's balanced development.


思路清晰，语言尚待推敲，明显要比另外两篇好。

duduhahaUID: 2273118

The speaker asserts that the destiny of society is determined by how children are socialized.It is ture that children's socialization is vital to the development children,as well as the future of our society,but we cannot overlook other factors in the children education.Besides, I hold that we have not yet learned how to raise children who can help bring a better society.

  First of all, socialization of children plays an important role in the development of our soceity. John Milton once said:"The childhood shows the man,as morning shows the day."（好句子啊） Undoubtedly,children is the future backbone of our society, whose wholesome development serves as a pillar for society's prosperity.And as an necessary component of children's growing process, socialization of children means how the children interact with other people and what's situation they are exposed.Without the healthy interaction with peers, child may feel isolated and helpless,especially when they confront with frustration.If the children could be properly socialized since their childhood, they could attain the realistic social experience and knowledge that how to negotiate and cooperate.Further more, socialization of children also help children to be cognizant of their responsibility to the society,as well as the society value such as moral vaules and ethical principles.

  However, other factors,like intellectual education and personality, are also important when we raise children for the progress of our society.To understand this point well,one needs to look no further than Nash,one of the Nobel Prize owner.Exculsive from the mundane world and not well socialized with other people,Nash is indulged and immerse in his scientific field with diligence,concentration and tolerance and makes great contribution to the society.This example illustrates that socialization won't totally determine the destiny（of) the person and the society.   Actually,as we know,Nash did not lead a happy life due a great part to lack of the communication with other people.Probably he would gain more economic achievements if his childhood had been given proper socialization.（这几句话似乎和本段的论点相悖，放在这似乎不太合适）。

  Fortunately,people have realized the importance of the socialization of the children,however,we still have not yet learnt how to raise children who can better society.Both the family and the school play a virtal role in socialization.On the one hand,many parents fail to set up a good example to their children.The family quarrels and even family violence put a bad influence on the growth of their children.In some traditonal culture like China,parents always indulge their children（这句话说得感觉不好）,and satisfy their many demands.Unfortunately, most parents have not realised the bad effect of spoiling kids. Besides, nowadays more and more TV programs are filled with taking drugs, homosexuality and pornographic contexts,that directly leads the children to have a negative attitudes towards the society.On the other hand, the school education emphasizes too much on the intellectual cultivation and overlooks the significant function of the emotional education.Only by setting more curriculums and programs to help students promote their social ability will the students easily adapt for the complex society after graduation. Nevertheless，our human society has been changing all the time ,so is the way how children have(been) raised in order to bring about a better society.

  In sum, although children's socialization plays a hinge role in their development,it is not the sole factor. On the other hand, （用在这似乎不太好）in order to guarantee our society's prosperity, it is high time we spare no effort to build up an active environment to facilitate children's balanced development.