Issue36 【四海一家】第二次作业 请狠狠批!

vincentshinUID: 2246176

TOPIC: ISSUE36 - "The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not by their contemporaries."
不限时
The speaker asserts that the greatness of individuals should be determined only by the later generations, other than by their contemporaries. I see a lot of truth from this general assertion. However, the speaker seems to extend this claim to an unwarranted extreme, while overlooking a few indispensable exceptions. On the whole, as far as I am concerned, this statement is fundamentally correct.

To begin with, what is the most important is that the definition of greatness. Nonetheless, the statement does not drop a word in this critical problem, which directly leads to the complexity of this issue. Some might argue that the exact meaning of greatness should be made clear by the value systems of contemporaries, for the reason that who are more likely to be well informed of the whole picture of one person. Admittedly, this point of view has some merit from a normative standpoint. Yet I am hard- pressed to name only a few instances to contend with this opinion. The long history is replete with such individuals, who were nameless at that time and led miserable lives, even condemned to death by men of the time. Vincent van Gogh, considered as one master of Impressionism now, was nameless then. As well as William Blake was never gaining much attention from the local London art world and even being viewed as "lunatic" for his imaginative work. Indisputably, due to the various factors of different times, with respect to politics, interests, commonly accepted values, and popular opinions and so forth, the true meaning of one's greatness is unavoidably distorted by people of his time. In the light of this point of view, the definition of greatness in the past is not necessarily consistent with that at present. Thus, which should be our yardsticks for measuring the greatness?

In my observation, the greatness of individuals should withstand and thus be examined by the test of time. Only time can tell the very nature of one's greatness in a more objective, fair, and well- rounded fashion. Only time can extract the truth out of what one has done while rectifying and rebuilding one's reputation. Only time can epurate one's achievements from a long- term perspective. Only time can wipe out the prejudices, misunderstandings, and falsehood that deeply rooted in the head of contemporaries. In short, greatness must be tested over time before it can be confirmed.

When it comes to the scientific realm, the importance of many scientific achievements waited years, even centuries, to be validated by the scientists after the extensive accumulation of proof and data. For telling examples, one need look no further than the discovery of DNA Double Helix Model, made by Watson and Crick, this advance in the history of molecular biology completely upset the predominant protein theory. Accordingly, a long time period has passed before the greatness of this model was gradually accepted and validated by the experimental and statistical proof. In a word, the greatness of individuals should be measured by time, hence being appreciated by the later generations for the long term benefits.

On the other side is my further supporting evidence involving individuals who put the nuclear fission into practical use. Turn our attention to the nuclear power plants, whose births have greatly lessen our burdens on the increasingly limited source of energy, thus saving us from the so-called energy crisis. While providing us with the alternative source of energy, by nuclear blasts and by nuclear meltdowns, the power of atom has also murdered and maimed a myriad of innocent people. Hence, the greatness of scientists, who carry this theory into execution, should be judged by their later generations, if not the test of time.

Beyond the foregoing agreements, however, it must be admitted that some cases might justify exceptions. Consider, for example, the domain of business. Though there are various definitions of the greatness with regard to business leaders, the main goal and objective of business is to strike a delicate balance between the profit maximization for a firm's shareholders and its owners, and the interests of all related particular groups, as well as the societal benefits. In the light of this point, just with one glimpse of Bill Gates, or the founder of Dell Inc., Michael Dell, who are noble figures active in both business field and public causes, common sense tells that their greatness is undoubtedly being valued by contemporaries, that is, by us.

In the final analysis, from what has been discussed above, I hope it has been shown that the speaker's idea is basically on the right philosophical side.

我写了足足四个小时。请多多指教。根据建新的悉心修改再加以完善。特此鸣谢！Still to be revised...



[ 本帖最后由 vincentshin 于 2007-2-8 15:35 编辑 ]

dream191919UID: 2245981

Issue36 【四海一家】第二次作业请狠狠批!

TOPIC: ISSUE36 - "The greatness of individuals can be decided only by those who live after them, not by their contemporaries."
不限时The speaker asserts that the greatness of individuals should be determined only by the later generations, other than(rather than) by their contemporaries. I see a lot of truth from this general assertion. However, the speaker seems to extend this claim to an unwarranted extreme, while overlooking a few indispensable exceptions. On the whole, as far as I am concerned, this statement is fundamentally correct.To begin with,(好) what is the most important is that the definition of greatness. Nonetheless, the statement does not drop a word in this critical problem, which directly leads to the complexity of this issue. Some might argue that the exact meaning of greatness should be made clear by the value systems of contemporaries, for the reason that who are more likely to be well informed of the whole picture of one person. Admittedly, this point of view has some merit from a normative standpoint. Yet I am hard- pressed to name only a few instances to contend with this opinion. The long history is replete with such individuals, who were nameless at that time and led miserable lives, even (was) condemned to death by men of the time. Vincent van Gogh, considered as one master of Impressionism now, was nameless then. As well as William Blake was never gaining much attention from the local London art world and even being viewed as "lunatic" for his imaginative work. Indisputably, due to the various factors of different times, with respect to politics, interests, commonly accepted values, and popular opinions and so forth, the true meaning of one's greatness is unavoidably distorted by people of his time. In the light of this point of view, the definition of greatness in the past is not necessarily consistent with that at present. Thus, which should be our yardsticks (好)for measuring the greatness?In my observation, the greatness of individuals should withstand and thus be examined by the test of time. Only time can tell the very nature(觉得quality更好) of one's greatness in a more objective, fair, and well- round fashion. Only time can extract the truth of what one has done while rectifying and rebuilding one's reputation. Only time can epurate one's achievements from a long- term perspective（透视画法？）. Only time can wipe out(rule out) the prejudices, misunderstandings, and falsehood that deeply rooted in the head of contemporaries. In short, greatness must be tested over time before it can be conformed(confirm?).[排比句用得很好，怎加了文章的气势] When it comes to the scientific realm, the importance of many scientific achievements waited years, even centuries, to be validated by the scientists after the extensive accumulation of proof and data. For telling examples, one need look no further than the discovery of DNA Double Helix Model, made by Watson and Crick, this advance in the history of molecular biology completely upset the predominant protein theory. Accordingly, a long time period has passed before the greatness of this model was gradually(是不适应该换成fully) accepted and validated by the experimental and statistical proof. In a word, the greatness of individuals should be measured by time, hence being appreciated by the later generations for the long term benefits. On the other side is my further supporting evidence involving individuals who put the nuclear fission into practical use. Turn our attention to the nuclear power plants, whose births have greatly lessen our burdens on the increasing（去掉increasing或把increasing limited 变成lacking） limited source of energy, thus saving us from the so-called energy crisis. While providing us with the alternative source of energy, by nuclear blasts and by nuclear meltdowns, the power of atom also (删掉)has also murdered and maimed a myriad of innocent people. Hence, the greatness of scientists, who apply this theory into the real world(carry into execution), should be judged by their later generations, if not the test of time.Beyond the foregoing agreements, however, it must be admitted that some cases might justify exceptions. Consider, for example, the domain of business. Though there are various definitions of the greatness with regard to business leaders, the main goal and objective of business is to strike a delicate balance between the profit maximization for a firm's shareholders and its owners, and the interests of all related particular groups, as well as the societal benefits. In the light of this point, just with one glimpse of Bill Gates, or the founder of Dell Inc., Michael Dell, who are noble figures active in both business field and public causes, common sense tells that their greatness is undoubtedly being valued by contemporaries, that is, by us.[以上各部分例证很充分，这点作者做得很到位]In the final analysis, from what has been discussed above, I hope it has been shown that the speaker's idea is basically on the right philosophical side.

[作者的语言表现手法很不错，尤其好多承上启下的连接词和短语用得不错，这值得学习。

可是关于伟大的定义有些不明确，主要是找不到一个特定的表达，我觉得其实就可以根据你正文

主体所写的几个方面现在开头设一个明确的定义，而不是设问，这样感觉文章会更有组织。

意见不成熟，仅供参考]