argument 51 (076G飞越小组第二次作业 ) 大家来拍阿

宇文化天UID: 2236904

TOPIC: ARGUMENT51 - The following appeared in a medical newsletter.

"Doctors have long suspected that secondary infections may keep some patients from healing quickly after severe muscle strain. This hypothesis has now been proved by preliminary results of a study of two groups of patients. The first group of patients, all being treated for muscle injuries by Dr. Newland, a doctor who specializes in sports medicine, took antibiotics regularly throughout their treatment. Their recuperation time was, on average, 40 percent quicker than typically expected. Patients in the second group, all being treated by Dr. Alton, a general physician, were given sugar pills, although the patients believed they were taking antibiotics. Their average recuperation time was not significantly reduced. Therefore, all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as part of their treatment."
WORDS: 343          TIME: 0:30:00          DATE: 2007-2-25

The arguer intends to prove that all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as a part of treatment. To support his claim, the arguer cites the result of a recent research that the recuperation time of patients who were treated by antibiotics was 40 percent quicker than expected, while the recovering time of another group which is not given antibiotic is not significantly reduced. The conclusion sounds reasonable at first sight, but there several critical flaws indeed.

In the first place, the arguer is based on the false analogy. He neglect the difference between the two groups. Maybe there all young people in the first group and all old people in the second group. Actually, the people in the first group will heal much quicker than the second one.

What further weakens the argument is that the two group are treated by two different doctors. The first group was treated by Dr. Newland who specializes in sports medicine and the doctor of the second group is Dr. Alton, who is a general physician. It is common sense that the doctor of the first group is more specialized in muscle strain than Dr. Alton. So we can make a reasonable assumption that it is the doctors that make the different recuperation time of two groups.

Last but not the least, the arguer commits a fallacy of hasty generalization. If the antibiotics is good for the recuperation f muscle stain. we should take many other things into account, for example，the price of antibiotics，hyper susceptibility and so on. Maybe it is not fit for every one.

As it stand, the argument is not well reasoned. To make it convinced, the arguer should to establish a causal relationship between antibiotics and the recuperation, and he needs to prove that it is necessary to take antibiotics as a part of treatment in muscle strain. Additionally, the arguer should provide more evidence to rule out the possibilities I have just mentioned above that might weaken the argument.

革命者UID: 2261957

首先我先说一下这篇文章的提纲：

假设：Doctors have long suspected that secondary infections may keep some patients from healing quickly after severe muscle strain。
         医生长时间怀疑二次感染导致一些病人从严重的肌肉疼痛中恢复。
结论：Therefore, all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as part of their treatment.
         因此，所有的被诊断出患有肌肉疼痛病的病人最好被建议使用抗生素作为治疗的一部分。
证据：results of a study of two groups of patients
关键词：suspected,severe,all,

提纲：1，从假设到结论的推理不成立，不是所有人都应该使用抗生素。
         2，证据到假设成立的推理过程不成立，因为即使试验是有效的，它只能证明抗生素的作用不能说明二次感染使病人不能尽快康复。
         3，试验有问题。

下面把你的文章进行修改：
The arguer intends to prove that all patients who are diagnosed with muscle strain would be well advised to take antibiotics as a part of treatment. To support his claim, the arguer cites the result of a recent research that the recuperation time of patients who were treated by antibiotics was 40 percent quicker than expected, while the recovering time of another group which is not given antibiotic is not significantly reduced. The conclusion sounds reasonable at first sight, but thereare several critical flaws indeed.

In the first place, the arguer is based on the false analogy.牙根就没有错误类比这回事He neglect the difference between the two groups. Maybe there all young people in the first group and all old people in the second group. Actually, the people in the first group will heal much quicker than the second one. 这句话太不地道应该写成: As a result ,the patients of the first group will recover much quicker that the second one.这一段没有发现主要错误，由此得出你只能最多得4分

What further weakens the argument is that the two group are treated by two different doctors. The first group was treated by Dr. Newland who specializes in sports medicine and the doctor of the second group is Dr. Alton, who is a general physician. It is a common sense that the doctor of the first group is more specialized in muscle strain than Dr. Alton. So we can make a reasonable assumption that it is the doctors that make the different recuperation time of two groups.这句话不通顺

Last but not the least, the arguer commits a fallacy of hasty generalization. If the antibiotics is good for the recuperation f muscle stain. we should take many other things into account, for example，the price of antibiotics，hyper susceptibility and so on. Maybe it is not fit for every one.这个端就生了吧

As it stands, the argument is not well reasoned. To make it convincedconvincing, the arguer should to不应该有to establish a causal relationship between antibiotics and the recuperation, and he needs to prove that it is necessary to take antibiotics as a part of treatment in muscle strain. Additionally, the arguer should provide more evidence to rule out the possibilities I have just mentioned above that might weaken the argument.

我给你3分，你需要学习如何写作

aunknownUID: 2173661

原帖由 革命者 于 2007-2-25 22:39 发表
首先我先说一下这篇文章的提纲：

假设：Doctors have long suspected that secondary infections may keep some patients from healing quickly after severe muscle strain。
         医生长时间怀疑二次 ...

路过看一下, 改的很不错! 不过没你说的那么严重了, 顶楼的g友, 在改进改进还是很有前途的. :)
上次看过你的文章,觉得你的argument现在写的应该很好了, 下次去看看;d:

[ 本帖最后由 aunknown 于 2007-2-25 23:10 编辑 ]