Issue3【0706G－~4而后生~小组】第3次作业 by nap 有拍必回

napUID: 196976

TOPIC: ISSUE3 - "It is more important to allocate money for immediate, existing social problems than to spend it on long-term research that might help future generations."
WORDS: 644->651          TIME: 0:39:53          DATE: 2007-3-9(改过)

There is a popular view arguing that we should allocate more money for the existing social problems at present than on long-term research. As far as I am concerned, we should reach a balance between the budgets of them.

Investment in future research can benefit our descendances, which can not be replaced by making budget in the future.When studying the development at present, we can notice many invents are based on the research made a long time ago. In the IT fields, for example, we are being benefited by the Internet. However, the model of the Internet is based on the early study in NASA. During that time, the United States government makes a decision to develop network all over the country. Though the decision did not benefit any group of people except a small part of scientists, researchers invented and improved it. At present, though many countries are able to build anew type of world wide network, because the Internet is the original model,other countries might as well to follow it.

In addition, some long-term budget can prevent the potential problem. In some long-term fields, researchers are trying to study some solution to dealing with the urgent problem. There was once an earth quake in Los Angeles. During the earth quake, the bridges were broken and many people died because of it. It seems that this was only a catastrophe. After deeply researching, however, the scientists found that the main reason was the lack of studying. Though Los Angeles lies on the edge of two planks,the design of the constructions such as bridges, however, were at the level of at areas where few or no potential earth quake exists. In contrast, the Japanese scientists have been studying the earth quake and as a result the standard of the construction are very high. Some years ago when nearly the same level of earth quake happened, in a developing country where the research was poor hundreds of people died while in Japan no more than ten people hurt and no people died. Though the evidence may be a few, they strongly support the point that long-term research is important and we should make a tremendous budget on it.

On the other hand, we should not ignore the present social problems. Though the long-term budget is important, we are experiencing the current problems. There are many problems such as out-of-work and poor education which threaten us every second. If we ignore these ones, we will not have a stable live and let along doing research for the future. For example, if the out-of-work problem is very heavy there may be a lot of procession asking the government to solve it. Consequently, the stability is damaged for many basic facilities do not work. Besides, if the police security is seriously bad, there may be many robbers and the local shops may close because of it. Thus, people can not live normally and they must resort to other ways to live such as joining the robber groups letting along the long-term research.

Moreover, in some big social problems such as catastrophes, the government should not provide budget for the long-term research. If there is a tsunami, the government must let the goods for urgent event to go to the areas where the damage is heavy. In this time, is it practical for the scientists to do research in the labs?

To sum up, since two aspects are both important, the government should reach a balance between them. First the government must spend a certain amount of money to dealing the immediate social problems in order to make a stable environment. After this, the government should ponder what aspects of long-term research is necessary and how much should be given to them. Besides, if some urgent problems happened, the government must make the greatest effort to resolve it.

[ 本帖最后由 nap 于 2007-3-12 16:55 编辑 ]

gylambUID: 2284176

楼主写的已经相当好了 羡慕ing .
好象budget这个词用的太多了点 看看能不能找个其他次代替一下
problems at present  好象少了一点 平衡观点 不太平衡了
偶的 多谢赐教
http://bbs.gter.ce.cn/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=625539

insideUID: 2303230

There is a popular view arguing that we should allocate more money for the existing social problems at present than on long-term research. As far as I am concerned, we should reach a balance between the budgets of them.(你的开头已经十分定型了，清楚，明确，简洁！)

Investment in future research can benefit our descendances, which can not be replaced by making budget in the future. When studying the development at present, we can notice many invents are based on the research made a long time ago. In the IT fields, for example, we are being benefited by the Internet. However, the model of the Internet is based on the early study in NASA. During that time（在什么时期？）, the United States government makes a decision to develop network all over the country. Though the decision did not benefit any group of people except a small part of scientists, researchers invented and improved it. At present, though many countries are able to build a new type of world wide network, because the Internet are（is） the original model, other countries might （need）only to follow it.

In addition, some long-term budget can prevent the potential society（social） problem. In some fields of long-term(long-term这个词本身就是形容词), researchers are trying to study some solution to dealing with the urgent problem. There was once an earth quake in Los Angeles. During the earth quake, the bridges were broken and many people died because of it. It seems that this was only a catastrophe. After deeply researching, however, the scientists found that the main reason was the lack of studying. Though Los Angeles lies on the edge of two planks, the design of the constructions such as bridges, however, were at the level of at areas where few or no potential earth quake exists. In contrast, the Japanese scientists have been studying the earth quake and as a result the standard of the construction are very high. Some years ago when nearly the same level of earth quake happened, in a developing country where the research was poor hundreds of people died while in Japan no more than ten people hurt and no people died. Though the evidence may be few（这个词表示几乎没有）, they strongly support the point that long-term research is important and we should make a tremendous budget on it.（汗。。。地震不是潜在社会问题）

On the other hand, we should not ignore the present social problems. Though the long-term budget is important, we are experiencing the current problems. There are many problems such as out-of-work and poor education which threaten us every second. If we ignore these ones, we will not have a stable live and to do research for the future（这句话to接谁？）. Imagine that there is a scientist is（两个is） doing research. If the out-of-work problem is very heavy there may be a lot of pageants（procession吧，那个词是盛典的游街） asking the government to solve it. Consequently, the scientist may not receive sufficient budget to do the research. Besides, if the police are serious, there may be many robbers and the local shops may close because of it（警察严厉，强盗多？）. Thus, people can not live normally and they must resort to other ways to live such as joining the robber groups letting along the long-term research..

Moreover, in some big social problems such as catastrophes, the government should not provide budget for the long-term research. If there is a tsunami, the government must let the goods for urgent event to go to the areas where the damage is heavy. In this time, is it practical for the scientists to do research in the labs?

To sum up, since two aspects are both important, the government should reach a balance between them. First the government must spend a certain amount of money to dealing the immediate social problems in order to make a stable environment. After this, the government should ponder what aspects of long-term research is necessary and how much should be given to them. Besides, if some urgent problems happened, the government must make the greatest effort to resolve it.


个人觉得，你对长期研究的重要性论证非常充分，而对即将发生和正在存在之问题研究的重要性论证偏弱，建议写成偏正结构，而不是均衡结构。

第四段，说我们正经历一些社会问题，比如失业和教育水平低下等。但这些问题的严重性，我觉得你没有说到点子上，失业会导致社会不稳定，你把落脚点立在失业人多以后，科学家就得不到足够的资金做长期研究了，这是比较怪的。你应该论证对当前问题研究的重要性，这个重要性的前提不应该是科学家需要资金做长期项目，而最好是社会将不稳定。后面警察强盗的例子就更怪了。。。

第五段也有瑕疵。你是说紧急事件不容得政府进行长期研究，事实上，政府应该同时做好对灾难机理的长期研究和对救灾工作的及时展开。

个人意见哈。。