argument231, 欢迎来拍！！

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

231.The following appeared in a letter to the editor of a local newspaper.

"The members of the town school board should not be reelected because they are not concerned about promoting high-quality
education in the arts in our local schools. For example, student participation in the high school drama club has been declining steadily,
and this year the school board refused to renew the contract of the drama director, even though he had received many awards for his
original plays. Meanwhile, over $300,000 of the high school budget goes to athletic programs, and the head football coach is now the
highest-paid member of the teaching staff."

市学校委员会成员不应该再次当选，因为他们不关心在我们地区学校促进艺术教育的质量。举例而言，参加高中戏剧俱乐部的学生数量逐渐下降，今年校委拒绝与戏剧指导续约，尽管他以其原创剧作获得过很多奖项。同时，高中预算中超过三十万元用于体育项目，橄榄球总教练现在是全部教员中薪水最高的人。


The author of the editorial claims that the school shoul not reelect the members of the town school  board for that they do not pay much attention to promote high-quality education in the arts, which is surpported by the facts that fewer and fewer students join the school drama club and the school board was not willing to rehire the drama
director who has got man prizes for his original plays, what's more, much money goes to the athletic programs and the football coach is paid most among the teaching staff.
While I think that the analysisi lacks of consolidified evidence in proving the author's assertion is right.And my analysisi will be presented below.

The first problem of this editorial is that the author fails to tell us that what the level of the education in arts in the school is.I think that if the level of arts education is high
enough and it has a autorunning system, the school board should not pay much attention on it  and share some of the energy on other weak points of the education in the school. So whether the arts education needs to be concerned so much is still a problem.

Secondly, assuming that it is the school board that is not willing to concern so much about promoting high-quality arts education, we do not know that whether there are
other social orgnizations are surpporting the arts education.

Thirdly, there are many forms of arts and drama is just one of them. As the author told us that student participation in the high school drama club has been declining, we can not infer that the paticipations in all other arts clubs are also declining and we can not also infer that the declining paticipation in the drama club indicates that it is because of the declining of the students' interests, maybe their heavy load of study takes up most of their spare time that they have to give up their interests in arts.

Forthly, the school board's refusing to rehire the drama director doesn't mean that the school does not concern the arts education. Perhaps they just want to hire another
director for the drama club who is better than the present one.

At last, over $300,000 going to the athletic programs and the highest wages of the football coach do not mean anything. For that we can not see the budget going to the arts education program and whether it is higher than the budget that goes to the athletic programs is not known .Assuming that the budgets on the arts education from
the school board is fewer than on the athletic programs, there may be other resources of financial support from the society.And from thehighest payments of the football
coach ,we can only infer that the school also concerns the sports very much,except which we can not see anything.

In conclusion, the author only shows parts of evidence for his assertion and without other further proof for the problems I present above,I could hardly lend any of my
agreements to his assertion.If he wants to consolidate his assertion, he has to present other information such as whether the school board really does not concern the
promotion for the quality of arts education, whether there are other types of money from the society supporting the arts education in the school,and whether steady
declining paticipation in the drama club is because of the decreasing interets of the students and so on.

zsa1983UID: 2299564

The author of the editorial claims that the school should not reelect the members of the town school  board for that they do not pay much attention to promote high-quality education in the arts, which is supported by the facts that fewer and fewer students join the school drama club and the school board was not willing to rehire the drama director who has gotten many prizes for his original plays, what's more, much money goes to the athletic programs and the football coach is paid most among the teaching staff. While I think that the analysis lacks of consolidified evidence in proving the exactitude of the author's assertion (is right). And my analysis will be presented below.

The first problem of this editorial is that the author fails to tell us that what the level of the education in arts in the school is. I think that if the level of arts education is high enough and it has an auto running system, the school board should not pay much attention on it and share some of the energy on other weak points of the education in the school. So whether the arts education needs to be concerned so much is still a problem.
这个拨论点想的不错。
Secondly, assuming that it is the school board that is not willing to concern so much about promoting high-quality arts education, we do not know that whether there are other social organizations are supporting the arts education.（这一点完全没有论证，太空洞了）

前两点可以和成一段来写，主要写没有给出是否有必要给予很大关注。

Thirdly, there are many forms of arts and drama is just one of them. As the author told us that student participation in the high school drama club has been declining, we can not infer that the participations in all other arts clubs are also declining and we can not also infer that the declining participation in the drama club indicates that it is because of the declining of the students' interests, （你的前提是市学校委员会成员不关心艺术导致学生兴趣下降，这一点并没有给出哦）maybe their heavy load of study takes up most of their spare time that they have to give up their interests in arts.

Fourthly, the school board's refusing to rehire the drama director doesn't mean that the school does not concern the arts education. Perhaps they just want to hire another director for the drama club who is better than the present one.
有点短了，稍微再加点东东哈
At last, over $300,000 going to the athletic programs and the highest wages of the football coach does not mean anything. For that we can not see the budget going to the arts education program and whether it is higher than the budget that goes to the athletic programs is not known .（感觉多个even更好）Assuming that the budgets on the arts education from the school board is fewer than on the athletic programs, there may be other resources of financial support from the society. And from the highest payments of the football coach, we can only infer that the school also concerns the sports very much, except which we can not see anything.

In conclusion, the author only shows parts of evidence for his assertion and without other further proof for the problems I present above, I could hardly lend any of my agreements to his assertion. If he wants to consolidate his assertion, he has to present other information such as whether the school board really does not concern the promotion for the quality of arts education, whether there are other types of money from the society supporting the arts education in the school, and whether steady declining participation in the drama club is because of the decreasing interest of the students and so on.