argument140 -anan

zsa1983UID: 2299564

Argument140  第2篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：50分10秒     513 words
从2007年3月2日11时15分到2007年3月2日12时50分
------题目------
The following appeared in a report of the Committee on Faculty Promotions and Salaries at Elm City University.
'During her seventeen years as a professor of botany, Professor Thomas has proved herself to be well worth her annual salary of $50,000. Her classes are among the largest at the university, demonstrating her popularity among students. Moreover, the money she has brought to the university in research grants has exceeded her salary in each of the last two years. Therefore, in consideration of Professor Thomas' demonstrated teaching and research abilities, we recommend that she receive a $10,000 raise and a promotion to Department Chairperson; without such a raise and promotion, we fear that Professor Thomas will leave Elm City University for another college.'
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The assertion cannot be supported by the evidence the speaker supports.

First of all, the speaker adduces that the class of the Professor Thomas(P.T.) are among the largest at the university, demonstrating her popularity among students. Maybe such evidence is used for supporting her demonstrated teaching. But, unfortunately, it is far from being enough. The largest class at the university is little indication that the professor is most popular. Perhaps the school has some requirement that all students in the school should learn such curriculum provided by P.T . . . . For that matter, even the number of students which should join certain class is large, it is possible that the factual number having a listen to her class is extremely less. The speaker cannot provide some evidence to rule out the possibility, and so I cannot agree that the P.T. is truly of popularity.

Secondly, the evidence that the money she has brought to the university in research grants has exceeded her salary in each of the last two years should not be as a proof of her research abilities. Perhaps comparing with other professor of botany, the money they brought is far less, and this may prove her ability not very superbly. Or perhaps except the salary, the school also provide some other awards to the professor, when add all these money, the incoming from the research may be lower. In short, just from the money she brought, any information cannot be provided. The speaker should give a list about all professors to have a contrast with her.

Thirdly, even the P.T. is truly in demonstrated teaching and research abilities, also such assertion that she should receive a $10,000 raise and promotion to Department Chairperson. Also the speaker does not provide such evidence that whether, to compare with other professors, the P.T. is the best one or not. If so, what have we provided to her enough? Perhaps the salary provided to her is greatly more that all other professors, and according to her condition, she would be very satiable. But if not, why should we give so more attention to her, may someone else should be prized. Lacking certain evidence, it is the same likely that there are other professors who do more well in teaching and in researching. Without a real survey, how can I give agreement to raising her salary and promoting the Department Chairperson?

Moreover, assuming that the P.T. is really good at teaching and research, then it will occur that without such a raise and promotion, the P.T. will leave Elm City University for another college. Perhaps what the P.T. needs is nether the raising money or such a promotion, but the opportunity to own such a job, which the school has well provide, in than teaching and research is just her interests. And she will not care the money and the promotion.

In the final analysis, I cannot lend my agreement to the assertion with such unconvincing evidence. To support his assertion, the speaker should provide some survey that whether the students are really enjoying the class of the P.T. , whether the money she brought is more enough than other professor and whether she have some need on the money or promotion.

eddie23508okUID: 2281260

The assertion cannot be supported by the evidence the speaker supports. (第一段好简洁阿，有点吓着我了，呵呵)

First of all, the speaker adduces that the class of the Professor Thomas(P.T.) are among the largest at the university, demonstrating her popularity among students. Maybe such evidence is used for supporting her demonstrated teaching. But, unfortunately, it is far from being enough. The largest class at the university is little indication that the professor is most popular. Perhaps the school has some requirement that all students in the school should learn such curriculum provided by P.T . . . . For that matter, even the number of students which (who) should join certain class (classes) is large, it is possible that the factual number having a listen to her class (别扭) is extremely less (small). The speaker cannot provide some evidence to rule out the possibility, and so I cannot agree that the P.T. is truly of popularity.

Secondly, the evidence that the money she has brought to the university in research grants has exceeded her salary in each of the last two years should not be as a proof of her research abilities. Perhaps comparing with other professor (复数) of botany, the money they brought is far less, and this may prove her ability not very superbly. Or perhaps except the salary, the school also provide some other awards to the professor, when add all these money, the incoming from the research may be lower. In short, just from the money she brought, any information cannot be (不是信息自己能够提供，而是被提供，所以应该用is not) provided. The speaker should give a list about all professors to have a contrast with her.

Thirdly, even the P.T. is truly in demonstrated teaching and research abilities, also such assertion that she should receive a $10,000 raise and promotion to Department Chairperson. Also (去掉) the speaker does not provide such evidence that whether, to compare with other professors, the P.T. is the best one or not (用一个复合句效果会更好). If so, what have we provided to her enough (没有谓语) ? Perhaps the salary provided to her is greatly more that all other professors, and according to her condition, she would be very satiable (satisfied) . But if not, why should we give so more attention to her, may someone else should be prized. Lacking certain evidence, it is the same likely that there are other professors who do more well in teaching and in researching. Without a real survey, how can I give agreement to raising her salary and promoting the Department Chairperson?

Moreover, assuming that the P.T. is really good at teaching and research, then it will occur that without such a raise and promotion, the P.T. will leave Elm City University for another college. Perhaps what the P.T. needs is nether (neither) the raising money or (nor) such a promotion, but the opportunity to own such a job, which the school has well provide, in than (where) teaching and research is (are) just her interests. And she will not care the money and the promotion.

In the final analysis, I cannot lend my agreement to the assertion with such unconvincing evidence. To support his assertion, the speaker should provide some survey that whether the students are really enjoying the class of the P.T. , whether the money she brought is more enough than other professor and whether she have some need on the money or promotion.

语言非常GRE，很不错，但是要注意不要过头了，太过头了会使意思不明确。继续努力！！！！