ISSUE83 [Victors小组]第九次作业 by c0053

c0053UID: 2285120

题目：ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
字数：367          用时：上午 12:52:48          日期：2007-6-15

The arguer claims that no matter how remote and how few people will go there government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their nature state, I strongly agree with him for several reasons.
First of all, the ecological balance of these areas may affect cities nearby or even the whole country. Although some areas are quite remote, their degradation in the environment may cause damage to other parts, because the world is an associated whole. Take the Brazil rain forests, for example, because they are so significant in regulating the whole world's climate, they are called "the lung of earth". As logging in these areas developed, lots of forests have been cut. Scientists point out that for this reason, some other parts of the world have betrayed signs of abnormal climate changes. Another case in point is the everglade, which is the heaven for many birds, fish and other creatures, is crucial to maintain the well-being of ecology. If it is destroyed, a quite large area will suffer a climate change and ecology degradation.
Secondly, these areas may have rare species which are important for research work due to their remote position and distinct environment. Tibetan antelope, for example, is a special kind of animal lives in the plateau where air is particularly thin and weather is quite harsh. They have the genes which make them adapt to the environment, and which, have important values in science. But they are recently largely slaughtered by hunters who want their precious fell. The government should be responsible to take effective measures to stop these deeds. Only when the protection of the precious species function well, can we have the resources to conduct our research more effectively.
Additionally, The areas may be of great economic value. The area of Siberia, where many sorts of minerals and energy sources exist, have been protected well and carefully exploited by the Russia government. Obviously, it is important to preserve these areas and make careful plan for future use.
In conclusion, publicly owned wilderness areas have their environmental, research and economic values which make their preservation a meaningful job. Government, as the delegation of interests of its people, undoubtedly should take this responsibility.

gyyxUID: 2290150

ISSUE83 [Victors小组]第九次作业 by c0053
题目：ISSUE83 - "Government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their natural state, even though these areas are often extremely remote and thus accessible to only a few people."
字数：367          用时：上午 12:52:48          日期：2007-6-15

The arguer claims that no matter how remote and how few people will go there government should preserve publicly owned wilderness areas in their nature state, I strongly agree with him for several reasons.
First of all, the ecological balance of these areas may affect cities nearby or even the whole country. Although some areas are quite remote, their degradation in the environment may cause damage to other parts, because the world is an associated whole. Take the Brazil rain forests, for example, because they are so significant in regulating the whole world's climate, they are called "the lung of 【the】earth". As logging in 【这个是什么意思，我把握不好】these areas developed, lots of forests have been cut. Scientists point out that for this reason, some other parts of the world have betrayed signs of abnormal climate changes. Another case in point is the everglade, which is the heaven for many birds, fish and other creatures, is crucial to maintain the well-being of ecology. If it is destroyed, a quite large area will suffer a【加上abnormal是不是好点】 climate change and ecology degradation.
Secondly, these areas may have rare species which are important for research work due to their remote position and distinct environment. Tibetan antelope, for example, is a special kind of animal lives in the plateau where air is particularly thin and weather is quite harsh. They have the genes which make them adapt to the environment, and which, have important values in science. But they are recently largely slaughtered by hunters who want their precious fell.【这段藏羚羊的例子比较精彩，我也想举这个来着，后来时间不多了解的东西又少，借鉴下你的哦】 The government should be responsible to take effective measures to stop these deeds. Only when the protection of the precious species function well, can we have the resources to conduct our research more effectively.
Additionally, The areas may be of great economic value. The area of Siberia, where many sorts of minerals and energy sources exist, have been protected well and carefully exploited by the Russia government. Obviously, it is important to preserve these areas and make careful plan for future use.
In conclusion, publicly owned wilderness areas have their environmental, research and economic values which make their preservation a meaningful job. Government, as the delegation of interests of its people, undoubtedly should take this responsibility.
点评：
1、        不知道是不是因为限制时间的原因，字数上少了点
2、        论证是比较充分的，例子比较多，用词也比较恰当，每个例子之后如果能有些点题之类的总结可能更好些。
3、        开头和结尾都写的比较精当的说，但是看过一些范文，有一定的升华，我是不太懂得怎么升华，但是还是希望你能提高这方面，毕竟你在语言和句式上已经比我强很多。