好久没写作文了,希望大家帮帮忙

chenglingfengUID: 2303037

Many people believe it is very important to make a large mounts of money while others are satisfied to earn comfortable living. Which do you prefer? Give specific reasons for your position.
    In this mammonist society, we always cherish the hope to make our fortune as much as possible. Therefore, while some people may maintain the idea of earning a large mounts of money, I deem highly that it is utterly satisfactory to earn a comfortable living.
Undoubtedly, our ultimate aim is to fully satiate during our lives with adequate daily necessities and some recreation facilities such as laptop and television. Using a laptop linking to the internet, we may keep in touch with our intimacies and have access to the latest news around the world. And television, on the other hand, is absolutely fraught with the programmers fully releasing our pressure. As long as we can afford buying the device illustrated above, and paying our daily expenses, our lives are promising to be radiant merely because we are communicating and it is the process of communication that stimulates the sincere affection surging within us.
    Furthermore, the money we earn are in proportion to the responsibility we have saddled. Undertaking so many responsibilities, we may easily be overwhelmed by the ubiquitous pressure lurking under the shade of urban life which naturally result in most of our psychological problems. For example, if a government officer develop a penchant for money and unsatisfied with his high wages, definitely, he will succumb to the temptation of the government’s revenue and finally commit embezzlement. It is just the aspiration to money that lures him to risk his brilliant future.
    Some people may argue that with more money we have made, our offspring may free from the anxiety of financial deficit but past experience may disprove this idea, With so much fortune in hand, they are inclined to forfeit the fortitude of enduring ordeal and meanwhile their enthusiasm of creating a marvelous life is fading away.
    To sum up, it is completely adequate that we just earn a comfortable living for the reason of enjoying ourselves, avoiding entangling in the pressure and leaving a scope of fighting for a better life for our posterity.
这样的文章大概能拿几分,哪些地方还需要改进,请大家指出吧,谢谢!

[ 本帖最后由 chenglingfeng 于 2007-7-1 12:36 编辑 ]

achillisharryUID: 2277269

chenglingfengUID: 2303037

可总觉得还有好多不足啊!ETS不会连我这种文章都打高分吧!

kevinliu6883UID: 2338522

To make more money is a will or an intention. It is good when you can make your dream come true.

Satisfied to earn a comfortible life is a feeling. When you feel satisfied, you may stop trials and quit hard working. If you think your life is not comfortible, you have to do something to improve it. Making more money is one approach. It may help you have a comfortible life. It may ruin your health and destroy your life.

Anyway keep a balance between your ability and your need. Quitting hard working may deprive you from making good life, while working all day without play makes Jack a dull boy.

When you have strong ability, you may not be satisfied with maintaining a comfortible life. You will think how to realize the value of your life. The life value may not be measured competely with dollars. Can you say Einstein's relativity theory is less valued than 1 billion dollar? But both Bill Gates and Albert Einstein realized their values. Making money is not a good choice.

Not every one can be Einstein or Gates. But every one can his/her life on balance. A good feel of satisfactory with present life is important for common people.

[ 本帖最后由 kevinliu6883 于 2007-7-5 05:44 编辑 ]