8.23新出炉的作文，哈哈，大家来拍吧

67169619UID: 2320695

;d:

forbeckUID: 2297645

:funk: 晚上又有两篇，还好天空同学没来

67169619UID: 2320695

哈哈                 嘿嘿           
呵呵                 啊啊

夜空的彼方UID: 159120

嘿嘿，我现在贴上来？
一大一小两篇 ;d:

djconanUID: 2257634

我晕，夜空，你帮我改改把:)

67169619UID: 2320695

原帖由 夜空的彼方 于 2007-8-23 21:22 发表
嘿嘿，我现在贴上来？
一大一小两篇 ;d:

嗯  ，蒙牛MM就是想你来了

夜空的彼方UID: 159120

------------------------------------------------------------------------
It can not be denied that minority languages and cultures are dying out as we entered the epoch of globalization. In fact, this trend may bring some disadvantages of different culture identity(这句你想说什么呢？culture identity的意思是文化身份，按照你的句子理解，“将带来文化身份的缺点”？). To get a sense of how this phenomenon emerged, we must turn first to the causes to it.

First and foremost, it is the economic globalization that makes it possible for all the people to use only one common language to communicate, and even to make them identify others’ culture. In addition, when two completely different cultures meet at the first time, the one in inferior situation would probably be in the danger of extinction. Lastly, people who speak minor language could not pay enough attention to their language and culture. （why？）Instead, they inclined to speak more international one, which, they thought, is a kind of fashion.

From the three reasons I mentioned above, I would like to suggest some solutions to them. First of all, the government of those nations with minor languages should take some measures to enhance the awareness of protecting their own language and culture, which, otherwise, would potentially endanger national identity(这句是对的，可以这么用). Secondly, it is the non-governmental organization’s responsibility that provides some lectures to show the importance of their own language and how to protect their culture. Thirdly, all walks of society(刚查了一下，确实是社会各个阶层的意思，不错！~:) ) should help each other to preserve their cultures.

As a proud citizen of our colorful global village, I do agree that there are irresistible benefits in having a common language. However, as each language and culture plays an essential role in forming （我觉得这里加个forming比较好）diversity of the world, it is high time that we protected them.

问题算是说清楚了，在句式上也能看得出来你是下功夫了，错误暂时只能帮你改到这些，要注意单复数！:)

67169619UID: 2320695

夜空同学的确很热心

继续加油

forbeckUID: 2297645

ft！:funk:

我明早早起给大家补交任务吧~~~~~~

djconanUID: 2257634

首先谢谢你帮我改阿！
disadvantages of different culture identity(这句你想说什么呢？culture identity的意思是文化身份，按照你的句子理解，“将带来文化身份的缺点”？). 我想说语言的消失减少了文化的多样性，但是我那个不太对好像，应该怎么说呢？
people who speak minor language could not pay enough attention to their language and culture. （why？）这个市应为，说小小语种的人一般不太在意他们的文化，因为说的人少吧。。不知道对不对？

夜空的彼方UID: 159120

It is harmful to the culture diversity. / Culture diversity will be decreased significantly. 多样性可以说diversity，呵呵，我是学生物的，老说生物多样性biodiversity :)

关于你那个例子，始终觉得不太理想，你可以说因为文化强权或者文化融合，小语种的那些民族因为自己的语言使用范围太少，很难和外界交流，所以开始放弃自己i的语言。

djconanUID: 2257634

谢谢:)

forbeckUID: 2297645

It can not be denied that minority languages and cultures are dying out as we entered(用现在时，因为全球化一直在进行中阿)the epoch of globalization. In fact, this trend may bring some disadvantages of different culture identity(identities). To get a sense of how this phenomenon emerged, we must turn first to the causes to(of) it.

First and foremost, it is the economic globalization that（which?） makes it possible for all the people to use only one common language to communicate, and even to make them identify others’ cultures. In addition, when two completely different cultures meet at the first time, the one in inferior situation would probably be in the danger of extinction. Lastly, people who speak minor language could not pay enough attention to their language and culture. Instead, they inclined to speak more international one, which, they thought, is a kind of fashion.

From the three reasons I mentioned above, I would like to suggest some solutions to them. First of all, the government of those nations with minor languages should take some measures to enhance the awareness of protecting their own language and culture, which, otherwise, would potentially endanger national identity.(? 不知道对不对). Secondly, it is the non-governmental organization’s responsibility that provides some lectures to show the importance of their own language and how to protect their culture. Thirdly, all walks of society should help each other to preserve their culture. As a proud citizen of our colorful global village, I do agree that there are irresistible benefits in having a common language. However, as each language and culture plays an essential role in diversity of the world, it is high time that we protected them.

1、 还是长句的问题吧！尽量长短结合，减少小错误~~

2 、First and foremost这类的，如果能减少使用次数，就尽量避免使用，太呆板了，这种短语

[ 本帖最后由 forbeck 于 2007-8-24 11:55 编辑 ]

67169619UID: 2320695

蒙牛MM改作文偷懒了 :)

forbeckUID: 2297645

想不出来了~~~~~`

枯竭:o