issue160 [0806G-奋斗小组]第三次作业(我的处女作)求拍!

神奇的光UID: 2398821

Given the fact that almost every realm has its own leaders, the question whether effective leadership requires that a leader consistently follow his or her principles and objectives should be determined on a case-by-case bases,as discussed below.
   Take it to the scientific field firstly. Many greatest physicists were the ones who remained consistently committed to particular principles and objectives. Einstein, the inventor of The theory of relativity, thought that the classical time-and-space theory was somehow flawed, although it was the prevailing theory in his times. If Einstein had yielded to popular opinions, he would never discovered the truth of our universe.
   When it comes to the business realm. the principles and objectives of an effective businessman is to maximum the profits of his or her company. Our society, however, is imposing more and more additional obligation to a cooperation nowadays. For example, many people claim that a successful business leader should protect comsumers, preserve the natural environment, promote education and alleviate society’s sufferings. If a business leader devote too much his or her  energy to these tasks, he or she will inevitably be distracted from his major goals to make as much money as possible for the company he or she get involved, and we cannot define such people as “ an effective business leader ”.
   Finally, consider the leadership in political realm. An effective leader shoule stick to his or her particular principles and objectives while take the will of his followers and voters into account. Many tyrants were extremely stubborn in sticking to their own antocracy, such as Hitler, Stalin and so on. But almost all of them were ended in no good. It was not because that they were not effective in committing to their goals, but because that they were too self-centered to listen to their would-be adherens.
  In sum, I agree that strict adherence to principles and objectives is a vital prerequisite for success in the scientific realm, and foundmentally the case in business field. However, when it comes to the politicians, we should be catious not to overstate the role of such adherence.

神奇的光UID: 2398821

我已经拍过别人的Issue了,拜托哪位高手也帮我拍一下吧.

lyj704UID: 2308235

Given the fact that almost every realm has its own leaders, the question whether effective leadership requires that a leader consistently follow his or her principles and objectives should be determined on a case-by-case bases,as discussed below.
   Take it to the scientific field firstly. Many greatest physicists were the ones who remained consistently committed to particular principles and objectives. Einstein, the inventor of The theory of relativity, thought that the classical time-and-space theory was somehow flawed, although it was the prevailing theory in his times. If Einstein had yielded to popular opinions, he would had(貌似是表示过去的虚拟语气吧～) never discovered the truth of our universe.
结尾有点仓促，应该再点一下分论点。有始有终嘛～:)
   When it comes to the business realm. the principles and objectives of an effective businessman is to maximum the profits of his or her company. Our society, however, is imposing more and more additional obligation to a cooperation nowadays. For example, many people claim that a successful business leader should respect right of comsumers, preserve the natural environment, promote education and alleviate society’s sufferings. If a business leader devote too much his or her  energy to these tasks, he or she will inevitably be distracted from his major goals to make as much money as possible for the company he or she get involved, and we cannot define such people as “ an effective business leader ”.
   Finally, consider the leadership in political realm. An effective leader shoule stick to his or her particular principles and objectives while take the will of his followers and voters into account. However, Many tyrants were extremely stubborn in sticking to their own antocracy, such as Hitler, Stalin and so on. almost all of them were ended in no good. It was not because that they were not effective in committing to their goals, but because that they were too self-centered to listen to their would-be adherens.最后这句有点中式，不妨用rather than来代替not because…, but because…
  In sum, I agree that strict adherence to principles and objectives is a vital prerequisite for success in the scientific realm, and foundmentally the case in business field. However, when it comes to the politicians, we should be catious not to overstate the role of such adherence.
逻辑和行文上还不错，但感觉你对列举的三个领域都有一点以偏概全。其实在这些领域都需要坚持原则的领袖，但坚持的一定是正确的原则，而错误的原则应该摒弃。比如科学上，托勒密一直坚持错误的地心说就是不对的，而政治上林肯坚持人生而平等就是正确的。ETS的原则是自圆其说就行，所以我建议能够将每一段补充得丰满一点，最后的结论也可以深化一下。

神奇的光UID: 2398821

谢谢,愿我们共同进步!:loveliness: