issue130 [spring小组] 第十一次作业

luckimonkeyUID: 2408088

Words: 593 Time: long(longest one)   Date: 2008-1-22
The assertion believes that the destiny of society depends on how children are socialized and shows dissatisfaction about the current education system for it can not raise children who can create a better society. I agree with the assertion insofar, except that it unnecessarily imposes the entire burden of creating a better society upon children.
    Admittedly, socialization plays a significant role in the formation of children’s character, which ultimately casts great influence on the society. As social animals, all of us are inevitably socialized since we were born, and through socialization we obtain many essential skills and virtues to adapt to the society. For children, they learn how to communication, cooperation and respect by playing games or participating other group activities. Those skills or virtues they obtain through socialization with others in the early age ensure them to become qualified social members who are able to make contribution to the society. On the contrary, without socialization, it is impossible to foster wholesome persons not to mention the potential social contributors. One apt illustration to this point involves the story of Helen Keller, a famous writer with hearing and seeing challenges. If her teacher, Annie Sullivan had never shown up and taught her how to learn and socialize with others, she would probably still be the capricious deaf and blind girl rather than a famous writer. Annie taught her the skill to study and communicate, which finally helped her step out of the isolated world and become a useful person. The story gives us a clue that without socialization, human being can only live like an animal just as Helen did in her early age.
    Unfortunately, examining the current education system, I seriously doubt whether it can cultivate qualified social members who can create a better society. In my opinion, a better society do not only stands for the prosperity of economy, technology and culture, but also means citizen of the society are more tolerate with each other. However, the current education system pays too much attention on children’s intellectual intelligence by compelling them to cram in knowledge more than they can absorb, while ignores some important issues like ethical principles, respecting and the capability to control their emotion. Therefore, the result is that we cultivate a generation of high-IQ-low-EQ children, many of whom are intellectual competent but morally and emotionally crippled. Some of them suffer from sever mental problems like hypochondria, and some become selfish and could not tolerate different opinions. To make things worse, lack the ability to control their emotion, a few children even resent their anger by hurting himself (herself) or others. All facts above illustrate that we can never expect the current education system can foster children who can create a better society.
    In addition, all generations should exert effort to create a better society. Imposing the task totally upon children is neither responsible nor reliable. As adults, they should work hard to maintain a sustainable social development as well as establish a new education system to ensure the healthy growth of children. Even when the children have grown up with the ability to undertake their job, the elder should provide useful experience and direct them to do smoothly. Only by the joint effort of every generation can we bring about a better society.
    To sum up, the society’s destiny dose not only depend on children but also on other generations of the society. Also, in order to create a better society, a new education system is needed to ensure the healthy and well-rounded development of children.

machelleUID: 2348066

The assertion believes that the destiny of society depends on how children are socialized and shows dissatisfaction about the current education system for it can not raise children who can create a better society. I agree with the assertion insofar, except that it unnecessarily imposes the entire burden of creating a better society upon children. Admittedly, socialization plays a significant role in the formation of children’s character, which ultimately casts great influence on the society. As social animals, all of us are inevitably socialized since we were born, and through socialization we obtain many essential skills and virtues to adapt to the society. For children, they learn how to communication, cooperation and respect by playing games or participating other group activities. Those skills or virtues they obtain through socialization with others in the early age ensure them to become qualified social members who are able to make contribution to the society. On the contrary, without socialization, it is impossible to foster wholesome persons not to mention the potential social contributors. One apt illustration to this point involves the story of Helen Keller, a famous writer with hearing and seeing challenges. If her teacher, Annie Sullivan had never shown up and taught her how to learn and socialize with others, she would probably still be the capricious deaf and blind girl rather than a famous writer. Annie taught her the skill to study and communicate, which finally helped her step out of the isolated world and become a useful person. The story gives us a clue that without socialization, human being can only live like an animal just as Helen did in her early age. Unfortunately, examining the current education system, I seriously doubt whether it can cultivate qualified social members who can create a better society. In my opinion, a better society do not only stands for the prosperity of economy, technology and culture, but also means citizen of the society are more tolerate with each other. However, the current education system pays too much attention on children’s intellectual intelligence by compelling them to cram in knowledge more than they can absorb, while ignores some important issues like ethical principles, respecting and the capability to control their emotion. Therefore, the result is that we cultivate a generation of high-IQ-low-EQ children, many of whom are intellectual competent but morally and emotionally crippled. Some of them suffer from sever mental problems like hypochondria, and some become selfish and could not tolerate different opinions. To make things worse, lack the ability to control their emotion, a few children even resent their anger by hurting himself (herself) or others. All facts above illustrate that we can never expect the current education system can foster children who can create a better society. In addition, all generations should exert effort to create a better society. Imposing the task totally upon children is neither responsible nor reliable. As adults, they should work hard to maintain a sustainable social development as well as establish a new education system to ensure the healthy growth of children. Even when the children have grown up with the ability to undertake their job, the elder should provide useful experience and direct them to do smoothly. Only by the joint effort of every generation can we bring about a better society. To sum up, the society’s destiny dose not only depend on children but also on other generations of the society. Also, in order to create a better society, a new education system is needed to ensure the healthy and well-rounded development of children

我觉得作者的语言应该已经没有问题。所以就这篇issue来讨论一下思路更好。有了好的例子，拓宽了思路，对写作更有帮助。
1。肯定socialization的作用，作者在这方面阐述得很好。
2。就题干 的socialization of children determines the destiny of society 提出质疑，其它的方面的也很重要，如自身的努力，一些宗教信仰，道德伦理的教育都对孩子（下一代）的培养很重要，而下一代将决定社会的命运
3。作者就raise children 提出了负面的例子，还有可以从正面肯定一下这一代的人已经取得了一定的成就，如改变了结束的封建制度，建立起了民主制度的国家 ， 提倡全球的环保，讲求人权等等来体现社会的进步，从而肯定了教育的得当。

luckimonkeyUID: 2408088

谢谢你哈。受益匪浅

yshxaUID: 2303585

The assertion believes that the destiny of society depends on how children are socialized and shows dissatisfaction about the current education system for it can not raise children who can create a better society. I agree with the assertion insofar, except that it unnecessarily imposes the entire burden of creating a better society upon children.
    Admittedly, socialization plays a significant role in the formation of children’s character, which ultimately casts great influence on the society. As social animals, all of us are inevitably socialized since we were born, and through socialization we obtain many essential skills and virtues to adapt to the society. For children, they learn how to communication, cooperation and respect by playing games or participating other group activities. Those skills or virtues they obtain through socialization with others in the early age ensure them to become qualified social members who are able to make contribution to the society. On the contrary, without socialization, it is impossible to foster wholesome persons not to mention the potential social contributors. One apt illustration to this point involves the story of Helen Keller, a famous writer with hearing and seeing challenges. If her teacher, Annie Sullivan had never shown up and taught her how to learn and socialize with others, she would probably still be the capricious deaf and blind girl rather than a famous writer. Annie taught her the skill to study and communicate, which finally helped her step out of the isolated world and become a useful person. The story gives us a clue that without socialization, human being can only live like an animal just as Helen did in her early age.
    Unfortunately, examining the current education system, I seriously doubt whether it can cultivate qualified social members who can create a better society. In my opinion, a better society do not only stands for the prosperity of economy, technology and culture, but also means citizen of the society are more tolerate with each other. However, the current education system pays too much attention on children’s intellectual intelligence:confused: by compelling them to cram in knowledge more than they can absorb, while ignores some important issues like ethical principles, respecting:confused: and the capability to control their emotion. Therefore, the result is that we cultivate a generation of high-IQ-low-EQ children, many of whom are intellectual competent but morally and emotionally crippled. Some of them suffer from sever mental problems like hypochondria, and some become selfish and could not tolerate different opinions. To make things worse, lack the ability to control their emotion, a few children even resent their anger by hurting themselves or others. All facts above illustrate that we can never expect the current education system can foster children who can create a better society.
    In addition, all generations should exert effort to create a better society. Imposing the task totally upon children is neither responsible nor reliable. As adults, they should work hard to maintain a sustainable social development as well as establish a new education system to ensure the healthy growth of children. Even when the children have grown up with the ability to undertake their job, the elder should provide useful experience and direct them to do smoothly. Only by the joint effort of every generation can we bring about a better society.
    To sum up, the society’s destiny dose not only depend on children but also on other generations of the society. Also, in order to create a better society, a new education system is needed to ensure the healthy and well-rounded development of children.
我觉得你的语言真的太好了，佩服不已啊！我写的时候很多词不知道怎么写，看到你的文章，真是茅塞顿开啊！你是怎么训练语言的？能不能告诉我？多谢啊！
你的文章总的来说结构不错，但是根据你第一段来看，你似乎主要想要讨论不应该imposes the entire burden of creating a better society upon children，不过你最后只是在in addition里提到了一些。如果这样的话，你可以把主题句改一改，更侧重与你论述的其他内容。
我写这篇文章总是觉得把握不好socialize的意思，感觉很难写下去。不过看了你的文章，忽然觉得还可以有很多其他路子来论述这个问题，呵呵，多谢哦！