issue 17(火箭小组)第一次作业

t3123055UID: 2498724

The author gives the claim from two aspects. The first one is whether the law is just for people. The second point is whether we should comply with the law. For two problems above, I will discuss from the definition of law and the authority of the law.
About all, the law’s justice bases on the difference of nations in our country and different place. Such as law about the price of rice, the lawgiver enact that law for limiting the price of law. Different people have different point about that. For people who buy the rice, it is the best thing, that will reduce money for them, and other living condition can improve. However, that is a worst thing for farmers, because they make a live on that rice, if the price of rice can’t increase, and other living thing go up quickly, and the fee of their children’s education, such as the fee or university, enhance like a horse, I think, it will be a serious problem, they will feel affliction, The burden on them will become heavier. Thus, that the law is just or unjust is bases on people’s benefit. Different people will have different thought on the law.
As for the second point, people should obey the law or not. I think everyone should comply with the law, because the law behalf most people’s interest, it possess some authorities, no body can resist it. As for the law about environment, in recent year, country emphasis comfortable surroundings around us, so a great of laws on environment after one and one. Especially some chemistry factory, country control the factory of chemistry. Much toxic substance will be output as diverse forms , such as the poisonous gas, liquid, solid metal. That will damage people, and many people must comply with that law about the protecting of environment, if someone sets up some serious toxic chemical factory, he will be punished. The other example also compel everyone to comply with it. It is personal tax, form long run, country enact one law on personal tax, everyone should put in how much money that depends on his income. For people who have higher income, they must put in more, that is a proportion of their earning. However, they think that income is their labors, they also create it by their own ability. If we see the problem from long run, we will think we must put in some parts of our income, because some people that they have lower income will feel they are not equal. Maybe they will destroy peace of the whole society.  In this case, every citizen should have commitment to comply with law. Only if every civics obey law, the whole society can become arranged, more harmonious, more affluent.
In sum, the law is fit for most people’s interest, and it is necessary for society’s stability. No matter what people think it is just or not, every civics have obligation to comply with it.

yanglinleeUID: 2380163

你的逻辑框架没有从ARGU很好的转过来,你应该凸显自己的观点并且论证.
两个例子都能很好的支持论点,不过用的太多了,可以考虑换一换.
不过思路还是很清晰的,加油加油哈

[ 本帖最后由 yanglinlee 于 2008-6-3 17:29 编辑 ]

byysUID: 2294038

不好意思，把时间记错了，改晚了。

The author gives the claim from two aspects. The first one is whether the law is just for people. The second point is whether we should comply with the law. For two problems above, I will discuss from the definition of law and the authority of the law.
开头最好能指出你的立场，到底是赞成，还是反对。你指出的不是非常明显。

About all, the law’s justice bases on the difference of nations in our country and different place. Such as (such as 能这么用吗？我想还是用for example好些。但是在TS之后，最后有一句过渡性的语句再举例子)law about the price of rice, the lawgiver enacts that law for limiting the price of law. Different people have different points about that. For people who buy the rice, it is the best thing, that will reduce money for them, and other living condition can be improved. However, that is a (the) worst thing for farmers, because they make a live on that rice, if the price of rice can’t(cannot 才是正式的格式) increase, and other living thing go up quickly, and the fee of their children’s education, such as the fee or(for) university, enhance like a horse, I think, it will be a serious problem, they will feel affliction, The burden on them will become heavier. Thus, that the law is just or unjust is bases on people’s benefit. Different people will have different thought on the law.
B1：指出法律的公正不好确定。

As for the second point, people should obey the law or not. I think everyone should comply with the law, because the law behalf most people’s interest, it possess some authorities, no body can resist it. As for the law about environment, in recent year, countries emphasize comfortable surroundings around us, so a great (number) of laws on environment was (were enacted) after one and one(one after another). Especially some chemistry factory, countries control the factory of chemistry. Much toxic substance will be output(emitted) as diverse forms , such as the poisonous gas, liquid, solid metal. That will damage people, and many people must comply with that law about the protecting of environment, if someone sets up some serious toxic chemical factory, he will be punished还是断成两句吧. The other example also compels everyone to comply with it. It is personal tax, form long run, country enacts one law on personal tax, and every one should put in be imposed on how much money that depends on his income. For people who have higher income, they must put in more, that is a proportion of/to their earning. However, they think that income is their labors; they also create it by their own ability. If we see the problem from in the long run, we will think we must put in some parts of our income, because some people that they have lower income will feel they are not equal. Maybe they will destroy peace of the whole society.  In this case, every citizen should have commitment to comply with law. Only if every civics obey law, the whole society can become arranged, more harmonious, and more affluent.
B2指出法律必须强制执行。

In sum, the law is fit for most people’s interest, and it is necessary for society’s stability. No matter what people think it is just or not, every civics have obligation to comply with it.

总评：建议楼主在写作，要注意一些语言搭配是否恰当。如果不确定，可以在google，longman的词典里查。单复数等要注意。
      我相信在备考的过程中，多看多模仿，一定会更好的。
     内容方面，两个论述段字数相差太多，如果这样，可以考虑把第二段拆开做两个自然段而保留为一个意群。
     此外，刚刚的yanglinlee 也没有写让步段。所以，我不知道是否是必须的。但是如果是比较传统的写法，应该有一个让步内容，让自己不至于太武断。

水平有限，请楼主原谅。