issue144逻辑，求狠拍，留下链接必回拍

superjiang001UID: 2300426

看了很多关于issue逻辑的帖子，总感觉只适用于特定类型的文章，求达人分析一下144的逻辑如何展开才好，我先简单列一下我的逻辑分析（我逻辑很烂），再贴上我写的文章，希望高人指点一下小弟啊，多谢！我肯定会回改的！
首先，没有艺术家的创作不可能有那些好的艺术作品-->但我们也不能忽略评论家的作用,他们可以帮助我们更好的欣赏这些作品-->也许有人说有些情况下评论家并不能很好的发现艺术珍品-->但这是有原因的-->最后就总结了（比较简单的逻辑）
144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Throughout the history, it has emphasized the work of art as a means of perpetuating permanent values, say, belief in the principles of liberty. I admit that artists have long time been preparing us something of lasting values, while at the same time we should not overlook the role of critics during this process. In fact, it is the contributions of these critics that we human beings can preserve such precious resources.

Admittedly, we human beings have paid tribute to artists for most of those classical works of art are created by them. These works of art have long been aimed at transmitting democratic values, reserving valuable cultures, even practicing our morals. It is primarily through such permanent things that a race can keep their own beliefs which people depended to promote society prosperous. Beethoven’s famous work, “The Fifth Symphony”, which accomplished with completely deafness, not only bring us into a world of wonderful melody, also teaches us how to face the difficulties during our lives. Monet, who did not receive reputation and even suffered extreme poverty during his life time finally accepted by the public, which also instructs us to keep on pursuing dreams that we actually love.

However, artists alone can not able to give the society something of lasting value. As a matter of fact, just for the contribution of critics can we have a chance to hold back some permanent values like mentioned above. Today we live in a world where works of art are accumulated by multiplying, nevertheless not all these thousands of works have great values either in artistic or cultural field and deserve to preserve. Luckily, with the help of professional critics, we can save our precious time other than waste them on those refuses due to most of the critics have profound knowledge in their particular artistic fields, and they can select us valuable works.

In addition, critics can provide us professional knowledge to help us better appreciating these works. For example, we alone maybe not able to find out the intense desire to express misery when facing with Van Gogh’s works for most of us have a limited knowledge about period of his life. However, if professional critics can introduce us some background information of that era and teaches us how to carefully observe those dark and somber, sometimes crude colors in his pictures, we can better acknowledge the poverty of humanity he desire to express.

Someone may argue that many critics have a limited competence to explore some great works. Emily Bronte, for instance, one of the prominent novelists in English literature history, received many extreme unfair comments when her most famous novel first came out, and which became a classic until forty years later. However, in my point of view, it is because her leading role of literature in the period of that time. The criterion of judgment about literature in that period of time is far behind her pace of thinking. Though she earned her reputation some time after her death, we did discover the various values in this classic, and we probably not able to appreciate this classic even until now if there is no literature critics.

In sum, I agree with the speaker’s claim that artists have always been creating brilliant works by their unique capacity and ingenious thoughts, however, the critics also play a significant role in the process of finding out lasting value. In fact, they are explorers and they can help us better appreciating those great works. Thus, it is rather superficial to simple say that it is the artist, not the critic, who gives society something of lasting value.

[ 本帖最后由 superjiang001 于 2008-7-23 19:49 编辑 ]

superjiang001UID: 2300426

哪位帮着修改一下啊，多谢了！！！
自己顶一下！

superjiang001UID: 2300426

哪位朋友来帮忙看一下啊？！自己顶！！！

superjiang001UID: 2300426

再顶一下吧，快沉了。。。

jinliyun123UID: 2306368

Throughout the history, it has emphasized the work of art as a means of perpetuating permanent values, say, belief in the principles of liberty. I admit that artists have long time been preparing us something of lasting values, while at the same time we should not overlook the role of critics during this process. In fact, it is the contributions of these critics that we human beings can preserve such precious resources.

Admittedly, we human beings have paid tribute to artists for most of those classical works of art are created by them. These works of art have long been aimed at transmitting democratic values, reserving valuable cultures, even practicing our morals. It is primarily through such permanent things that a race can keep their own beliefs which people depended to promote society prosperous. （这一句，有点不明白，感觉没道理，艺术家给人类留下了更持久的财富到人类文化通过艺术品传承，太突兀）Beethoven’s famous work, “The Fifth Symphony”, which accomplished with completely deafness, not only bring us into a world of wonderful melody, also teaches us how to face the difficulties during our lives. Monet, who did not receive reputation and even suffered extreme poverty during his life time finally accepted by the public, which also instructs us to keep on pursuing dream　s that we actually love.两个例子都在说艺术品教会我们怎样，后面加一句这种作用从古至今，绵延不绝多好，不然我都看不明白．要收拢观点．

However, artists alone can not able to give the society something of lasting value. As a matter of fact, just for the contribution of critics（怎么感觉很废话） can we have a chance to hold back some permanent values like mentioned above. 貌似可以加个分论点中心句，批评家把坏作品剔掉，你下面还有个论点哈，这样一目了然Today we live in a world where works of art are accumulated by multiplying, nevertheless not all these thousands of works have great values either in artistic or cultural field and deserve to preserve. Luckily, with the help of professional critics, we can save our precious time other than waste them on those refuses due to most of the critics have profound knowledge in their particular artistic fields, and they can select us valuable works. 这片我还没写，看了北美的，觉着洋鬼子论述时，细节很多，唉，我也论证很薄弱，为细化论证努力，共勉之～

In addition, critics can provide us professional knowledge to help us better appreciating these works. For example, we alone maybe not able to find out the intense desire to express misery when facing with Van Gogh’s works for most of us have a limited knowledge about period of his life. However, if professional critics can introduce us some background information of that era and teaches us how to carefully observe those dark and somber, sometimes crude colors in his pictures, we can better acknowledge the poverty of humanity he desire to express. 论证的很好，我要向你学习，呵呵

Someone may argue that many critics have a limited competence to explore some great works. Emily Bronte, for instance, one of the prominent novelists in English literature history, received many extreme unfair comments when her most famous novel first came out, and which became a classic until forty years later. However, in my point of view, it is because her leading role of literature in the period of that time. The criterion of judgment about literature in that period of time is far behind her pace of thinking. Though she earned her reputation some time after her death, we did discover the various values in this classic, and we probably not able to appreciate this classic even until now if there is no literature critics.小让步过后，最好再重申下自己立场，中心突出（如果我没猜错，你还是肯定批评家作用的，不是完全的平衡观点，只是小让步，做到分析的严密性）

In sum, I agree with the speaker’s claim that artists have always been creating brilliant works by their unique capacity and ingenious thoughts, however, the critics also play a significant role in the process of finding out lasting value. In fact, they are explorers and they can help us better appreciating those great works. Thus, it is rather superficial to simple say that it is the artist, not the critic, who gives society something of lasting value

我感觉你的文章还是很不错啊，希望以后能经常互改，不知你什么时候考阿


有我的第一篇ｉｓｓｕｅhttps://bbs.gter.net/thread-861109-1-2.html，谢拉，拍得狠些

jinliyun123UID: 2306368

补充一下，我也才备考，非牛人，所以只是一家之见，你随便看看就好

silentpatUID: 2513238

您好，我看了您对我的issue144的修改，受益匪浅，非常感谢

我也如约来看您的习作。因为对于issue的写法也不是很熟悉，语言的运用也不完全得体自信，所以不敢妄加评断

我想探讨一下破题的思路好了

我的立意是三个观点
一、对于认识艺术的价值，评论家并不必要。引用一个说法是佛家典故，惠能禅师曾经用过的，通过手指看月亮，但手指不是月亮，看月亮也不一定要通过手指。他本来是说文字与禅的关系。我借用了一下。不过表述不清楚，效果不好。
二、艺术作品本身只有艺术家本人能毫无曲解的阐释。因为任何人都无法完全理解艺术，包括评论家，因为没有任何人能复制艺术家的经历，体验他的感情。任何其他人的理解都是曲解。
三、评论本身有时会超越艺术而成为一种新的艺术。这就是recreation的含义。举了个例子就是金圣叹批改水浒。

但其实我的思路并不清楚。表达也不是很清楚。所以可能导致不容易看懂。确实是个问题。而且我的思路一般比较怪异，……呃，怪异
举的例子也不好，我还不太喜欢举西方的例子（了解也不多），东方的例子估计老美也看不懂。很挠头的说

关于您的逻辑，我归纳四个观点
一、艺术是艺术家创造的。援引贝多芬和莫奈的例子。
二、评论家帮助选择一些更有价值的作品。
三、评论家提供背景帮助我们理解艺术。
四、有时评论家也无法完全发掘有价值的作品。举例艾米莉·布朗特（恕我孤陋不识此君）。因为过于领先于时代。

我觉得您的论证也符合自圆其说的要求，逻辑合理。但我不清楚这个题目的要求是否应该提到艺术价值的理解和发掘，因为题目写的是gives something of lasting value. 我不知道这个give应该理解为赋予它一个含义还是创造。如果是创造的话，那我的前两个观点和您的后三个观点似乎都有跑题的嫌疑。

另外，文章的结构我虽然还没背范文和模板，但我听了几个考过G已经在国外的朋友的意见，比较刻板的使用了统一的结构。开头段最后一般会把所有论点赘述一边，每段一个论点，开头很突兀的摆上中心句。结尾我还不会写，一般就再念叨一遍

文法我注意到一个小问题，就是able没有动词词性，be able to是固定用法，如果用动词可以用enable（使能够）

再次感谢。祝好运

[ 本帖最后由 silentpat 于 2008-7-23 23:44 编辑 ]

superjiang001UID: 2300426

万分感谢啊！我以为我这帖子肯定没人看了呢，呵呵，你修改后的文章和那个链接我明天看，今天是在是太困了，呵呵，我8月15号在哈尔滨考，多多指教！

superjiang001UID: 2300426

万分感谢！等我明天仔细研究一下你的逻辑，然后再讨论！多谢啊

jinliyun123UID: 2306368

我也写了篇艺术类issue 218，如果方便，帮我看下，你也可以把你习作链接往我帖子里留，必回

jinliyun123UID: 2306368

https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=861445&extra=

jinliyun123UID: 2306368

貌似望留地址了https://bbs.gter.net/viewthread.php?tid=861445&extra=