impluse小组第二次作业.有拍必回!~

gabby19832004UID: 2461820

一直受雇于一个老板或者企业是否现实？
Several hundred years ago, when people earned their living by handicraft industry or agriculture, they maintained a stable professional life. This kind of life style however, has been closed off since the industrialization. Nowadays, job-hopping has become a indispensable part of our life.

First of all, it is almost unfeasible for a freshman to attain an admirable job to begin with. Concerning with the fact that we have thousands upon thousands graduates flock into the labor market the each year, we find it increasingly difficult to find a appropriate position for ourselves. Consequently, first job always be accepted as an expediency, and we are  still open to new oppertunities. For example, when I was graduated as a journalism student, I found myself a position in a PR company, and I keep on looking for chances to transform my vocation toward journalism.

Secondly, let us suppose for a moment that an ideal job is available to everyone. Could anyone assure me that the company will never collapse or it will prospers forever? If it could well functioned throughout our life time, could you be sure that you will not be fired or your company will not be fired by you? People tend to live a better life instinctively. Once the first well-paid corporation deteriorated, or we are forced to a serious personal financial situation, we will definitely quit the existing job to a relatively generous-paid one.

There is no denying we have certain professions with stable salary, invariable pensions that we would stay for our lifetime, like the officials. However these jobs are extremely limited. To insist to one job throughout your life you have to resist all the temptation of changes, which is impossible for me to sustain.

With all the contentions mentioned above, people change their jobs because of human nature. To be specifically, they want to chase their dreams, enhance their livings and make changes of their lives. It has already be a symbol of modern life, and we could not involve in a job stalemate throughout our life any more.
拍砖的大虾们请留下连接.

gabby19832004UID: 2461820

为什么都没有人拍啊??55555

19811010316UID: 2220703

你没有把链接放在主贴下面阿。
吃晚饭我拍。
哈哈。

迷茫者UID: 2514662

你掉队了~~~~加油赶~~~~~
Several hundred years ago, when people earned their living by handicraft industry or agriculture, they maintained a stable professional life. This kind of life style however, has been closed off since the industrialization. Nowadays, job-hopping has become a(n) indispensable part of our life. Mw

First of all, it is almost unfeasible for a freshman to attain an admirable job to begin with. Concerning with the fact that we have thousands upon thousands graduates flock into the labor market the each year, we find it increasingly difficult to find a(n) appropriate position for ourselves. Consequently, first job always be accepted as an expediency, and we are still open to new oppertunities(opportunities). For example, when I was graduated as a journalism student, I found myself a position in a PR(最好不要出现缩写 类似这样的也最好避免~开个玩笑我可以理解为personal relation rather than pubilc relation) company, and I keep on looking for chances to transform my vocation toward (a) journalism.留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USA;ld
Secondly, let us suppose for a moment that an ideal job is available to everyone. Could anyone assure me that the company will never collapse or it will prospers(prosper) forever? If it could well be functioned throughout our life time, could you be sure that you will not be fired or your company will not be fired by you? People tend to live a better life instinctively. Once the first well-paid corporation deteriorated, or we are forced to a serious personal financial situation, we will definitely quit the existing job to a relatively generous-paid one. gG8lb Q`5v;~­u寄托家园\C:V(n9jdR
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Of course,(意思有转折说有的工作可以不用换，有个连接词比较好) there is no denying we have certain professions with stable salary, invariable pensions that we would stay for our lifetime, like the officials. However these jobs are extremely limited. To insist to one job throughout your life you have to resist all the temptation of changes, which is impossible for me to sustain.寄托家园(Vp'o5v­BDA([|留学|签证|TOEFL|GRE Js4G2P|With all the contentions mentioned above, people change their jobs because of human nature. To be specifically, they want to chase their dreams, enhance their livings and make changes of their lives. It has already （been） a symbol of modern life, and we could not involve in a job stalemate throughout our life any more.
lZ的这篇文章 思路和结构上比第一篇进步了N多~~~~可以跟6分范文看齐了
词汇也用的恰当好处 把你的长处给SHOW出来了 但又不出现多而杂导致文章僵硬的现象
呵呵 发现语言上 没什么可以改的~~~应该向你学习才是
那就给思路的个小窍门：在写独立作文以前，一定得花3-5分钟明确你的观点 并在稿纸上写出你的3个论点 以及具体列子
时间太段少与3分钟 没什么效果 只能写出个大概 会很模糊 时间太长 可能会来不急~~后面还得留2分钟左右检查错误
磨刀不误砍柴功~~~个人认为开始的一点时间是很必要的~~~理清了 文章看起来 很有条理~后面也不会出现卡壳现象

19811010316UID: 2220703

Several hundred years ago, when people earned their living by handicraft industry or agriculture, they maintained a stable professional life. This kind of life style however, has been closed off since the industrialization. Nowadays, job-hopping has become a indispensable part of our life. (开头很牛鼻。彰显实力)

First of all, it is almost unfeasible for a freshman to attain an admirable job to begin with. Concerning with the fact that we have thousands upon thousands graduates flock into the labor market the each year, we find it increasingly difficult to find a appropriate position for ourselves. Consequently, first job always be accepted as an expediency, and we are  still open to new oppertunities. For example, when I was graduated as a journalism student, I found myself a position in a PR company, and I keep on looking for chances to transform my vocation toward journalism.,\

Secondly, let us suppose for a moment that an ideal job is available to everyone. Could anyone assure me that the company will never collapse or it will prospers forever? If it could well functioned throughout our life time, could you be sure that you will not be fired or your company will not be fired by you? People tend to live a better life instinctively. Once the first well-paid corporation deteriorated, or we are forced to(改成 be confronted with) a serious personal financial situation, we will definitely quit the existing job to a relatively generous-paid one. %S7t eH6u%E

+u b
h-iqUW2G
There is no denying we have certain professions with stable salary, invariable pensions that we would stay for our lifetime, like the officials. However these jobs are extremely limited. To insist to one job throughout your life you have to resist all the temptation of changes, which is impossible for me to sustain(me 不具有代表性).9?]+IfK        A

With all the contentions mentioned above, people change their jobs because of human nature. To be specifically, they want to chase their dreams, enhance their livings and make changes of their lives. It has already be(been) a symbol of modern life, and we could not involve in a job stalemate throughout our life any more.

感觉写的非常好。
我给你 6.0满分。
看看你以后的文章如何。
看看是否稳定。

gabby19832004UID: 2461820

非常感谢大家!~进一步努力!~