COMEON小组--------yuanhu124 9.11 作业

yuanhu124UID: 2444317

超时依旧！

We all need friends, because we human being is a kind of social animal. We may get helpful advice and suggestion from our friends. While, when it comes to the question whether it is better to get advice from the older friends or from those who are at your age. Some persons may think the older friends have more experiences, which would be beneficial. However, I definitely believe that the friends with similar age can be more helpful in giving advice.

For one thing, if your friends and you are at the same age, you may face the same problems and can learn from each other more effectively. Though the older friends may have more knowledge about how to deal with the issues in life, they also probably have no idea with the new troubles which you come across. For example, new technology, such as internet, is absolutely a new field for some old persons. How can they help you to solve the problems in internet? While, because of many younger friends master the skills in the using of internet, they would be better for you to turn to. Besides, you can corporate with other friends to handle the troubles more smoothly.

Furthermore, the advice from the friends at your age can be more practical than that from the older ones. For the reason of same age, your friends can listen to you more sympathetically and understand your situation more easily and appropriately. I once had some misunderstandings with my girlfriend. Then, I turn to one of my best friends, who is my classmate as well. He told me his love story, which included his feelings and actions in love. His suggestion actually helped me come out of the bad emotion and finally get well with my girlfriend.

Just as the old saying, a friend indeed is friend in need, all of our friends may help us to overcome the difficulties, and no matter they are old or young. Nevertheless, as the reasons above, I believe the advice given by the friends who are at your age can be more helpful.

ansoncodeUID: 2528782

We all need friends, because we human being is a kind of social animal. We may get helpful advice and suggestion from our friends. While(这个词干什么用的？我土了，没见过这种用法), when it comes to the question whether it is better to get advice from the older friends or from those who are at your age. Some persons may think the older friends have more experiences, which would be beneficial. However, I definitely believe that the friends with (of) similar age can be more helpful in giving advice.

For one thing, if your friends and you are at the same age, you may face the same problems and can learn from each other more effectively. Though the older friends may have more knowledge about how to deal with the issues in life, they also probably have no idea with the new troubles which you come across. For example, new technology, such as internet, is absolutely a new field for some old persons. How can they help you to solve the problems in internet? While（你好像很喜欢这个词嘛，你是想转折呢，还是递进呢？）, because of many younger friends master the skills in the using of internet, they would be better for you to turn to. Besides, you can corporate with other friends to handle the troubles more smoothly.（Internet这个例子不错，这一段写的不错）

Furthermore, the advice from the friends at your age can be more practical than that from the older ones. For the reason of same age, your friends can listen to you more sympathetically（同情地？） and understand your situation more easily and appropriately. I once had some misunderstandings with my girlfriend. Then, I turn to one of my best friends, who is my classmate as well. He told me his love story, which included his feelings and actions in love. His suggestion actually helped me come out of the bad emotion and finally get well with my girlfriend.（这一段的论证不充分，观点是同龄人的建议更为实用，例子支持得不好，同龄人怎么就能更好地调解你跟你女朋友的矛盾呢，这个是关键，否则，我还可以说过来人对感情更有经验呢）

（少了一段，导致论证显得不充分，要加强思维训练，怎么在短时间内brainstorm出三个理由，哪怕它们很牵强，只要能自圆其说就行）

Just as the old saying, a friend indeed is friend in need,（这个引用不够贴切，跟主题无关） all of our friends may help us to overcome the difficulties, and no matter they are old or young. Nevertheless, as the reasons above, I believe the advice given by the friends who are at your age can be more helpful

yuanhu124UID: 2444317

谢谢ls的修改。关于第三段的例子，我写的时候也觉得有些不妥帖，但是时间上来不及推倒重来，就坚持着写下去了。
我用while是想表示转折，这样用不行吗？我看我还是查查词典吧，谢谢你指出。
另外，你说少一点论证。我的作文基本都是两个论点+总结。我知道有人用三个论点的，但是我想这不是问题的关键吧，写两个论点的T友也挺多的。
谢谢！