COMEON小组--------yuanhu124 9.16 作业

yuanhu124UID: 2444317

今天这个题目比较好写，但是还是超时5分钟。不过，自己已经比较满意了~~往楼下多多批评！

As the rapid development of the globalization, it is said that our world has became a small village today. People have to communicate with more and more persons form other countries. Therefore, I definitely agree that the university should provide more courses about the cultures of other countries, in order to prepare the students well for the future work or life.

Absolutely, students can learn more knowledge from the curriculum of foreign cultures, and understand other civilizations much better. In my opinion, at least one course of other country's culture should be added into the core curriculum, and students should take those courses as early as better. For example, if there is an ancient Greek history course in an American university freshman's syllabus, he/she will learn about the origin of the western culture, and know much more about their own culture.

Furthermore, if one has taken a course of other country's culture, he would act better in the communication with people who are from other countries. Supposing an American travels to China, who have learned some knowledge of Chinese culture. When he/she comes to the Forbidden City, he would certainly know the symbolic meaning of the architectures. He/she even can introduce and explain this for his/her Chinese friends. What a pride!

What is more important, the teaching of cultures of other countries can promote the student to form a wide and tolerant worldview. This will benefit a lot for the students in the future life on the looking of people and affairs of other civilizations. Maybe, there will be fewer wars and more peace in the world.

To sum up, the courses on the cultures of other countries do help students in many aspects; the universities should pay serious attention to those courses.

ammyanaUID: 2529083

As the rapid development of the globalization, it is said that our world has became a small village today. People have to communicate with more and more persons form(from) other countries. Therefore, I definitely agree that the university should provide more courses about the cultures of other countries, in order to prepare the students well for the future work or life.
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O&X寄托家园留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USAA]*~n%c(Y
Absolutely, students can learn more knowledge from the curriculum of foreign cultures, and understand other civilizations much better. In my opinion, at least one course of other country's culture should be added into the core curriculum, and students should take those courses as early as better. For example, if there is an ancient Greek history course in an American university freshman's syllabus, he/she will learn about the origin of the western culture, and know much more about their own culture。（是怎么影响到他们学习自己的文化的？可以再细化一点，这个detail的例证不够充分吧！）
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Furthermore, if one has taken a course of other country's culture, he would act better in the communication with （when they communicate with）people who are from other countries. Supposing an American travels to China, who have learned some knowledge of Chinese culture. When he/she comes to the Forbidden City, he would certainly know the symbolic meaning of the architectures. He/she even can introduce and explain this for his/her Chinese friends. What a pride!（这个例子很不错，但表达上可以再出彩一点）
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What is more important, the teaching of cultures of other countries can promote the student to form a wide and tolerant worldview. This will benefit a lot for the students in the future life on the looking of people and affairs of other civilizations. Maybe, there will be fewer wars and more peace in the world.
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To sum up, the courses on the cultures of other countries do help students in many aspects; the universities should pay serious attention to those courses.

总的来说楼主的结构还是很清晰的，但是句子结构上还是没有用到位，另外，你的中文思维过于明显了，感觉还是像把自己的中文翻译了一遍一样。 the teaching of cultures of other countries can promote the student to form a wide and tolerant worldview比如这句，完全就是中文一字一句变过来的。。。
还有就是论证主题观点的时候有的地方没有特别合适的detail去支撑，感觉展开地得不够

评价也许不准，请见谅！大家一起加油吧！

namejoeUID: 2373013

As the rapid development of the globalization, it is said that our world has became a small village today. People have to communicate with more and more persons form other countries. Therefore, I definitely agree that the university should provide more courses about the cultures of other countries, in order to prepare the students well for the future work or life--help student prepare well for the future work and life..sd'wP1hi

Absolutely, students can learn more knowledge from the curriculum of foreign cultures, and understand other civilizations much better. In my opinion, at least one course of other country's culture should be added into the core curriculum, and students should take those courses--跟前句的at least one course不一致 可以改为such course as early as better. For example, if there is an ancient Greek history course in an American university freshman's syllabus, he/she will learn about the origin of the western culture, and know much more about their own culture.|留学|签证|TOEFL|GREz3{9a~eCM&F

Furthermore, if one has taken a course of other country's culture, he would act better in the communication with people who are from other countries. Supposing an American travels to China, who have learned some knowledge of Chinese culture. When he/she comes to the Forbidden City, he would certainly know the symbolic meaning of the architectures. He/she even can introduce and explain this for his/her Chinese friends. What a pride!
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What is more important, the teaching of cultures of other countries can promote the student to form a wide and tolerant worldview. This will benefit a lot for the students in the future life on the looking of people and affairs of other civilizations. Maybe, there will be fewer wars and more peace in the world.

To sum up, the courses on the cultures of other countries do help students in many aspects; the universities should pay serious attention to those courses.

总体感觉挺不错的,但从细节方面说,每段对相应的分论点论证不足,可能是因为时间的关系,建议LZ可以先试着将论证分成2段,各段充分进行论证,这样最后的效果可能比泛泛的三段要好.