自己写的求修改

cindyleegrerUID: 2458033

题目：In today's world, to speak well is more important than to write well. Agree or disagree

With the development of the technology, especially on the tools of communication, that the computers and cell phones are available makes Man can talk with another one although they are separated by a long distance. So it seems that writing letter is an expensive and inefficicent way to bring the message. However, the writing skills still play a more important role in our daily life, for speaking can not deals with all the things in life.

Admittedly, writing might brings unexceptable results which can not be obtained by merely using his or her mouth. For instant, it is sending a poem that is a wiser method to express your love than cost a simple sentence------- “I LOVE YOU !”. It is indisputable that romantic way is more easily to touch the hearts of girls. Writing skills not only help you produce a poem, but also creat a elegant skillful one which suggests that you are a well-educated youth man rather than a surface speaker.   

Although the sagas and legends can tell us something that happen thousands years ago by handed down from one generation of storytellers to another, paper-based record is a better way to preserve our history because it can present us a more reliable picture of long ago. So it is the history books that make the researches of anthropologists and archaeologists who wonder where the modern world came from easier. In the terms of the sail, the writing skills coule help the sailors find the right dirction as well as log things happened on the sea which act as a reference of the other sailors.

Fortunately, the writing skills make it is possible that literatuer from which Man gain the sense of beauty is available. When the writer reach an unutterable glimpse, it is unwise to try to utter it, they just need an imagery which is the only way to explain the meaning.

[ 本帖最后由 hyacinth 于 2008-9-21 12:00 编辑 ]

macross_36UID: 2306285

With the development of the technology, especially on the tools of communication, that the computers and cell phones are available makes Man(为啥大写?) can talk with another one although they are separated by a long distance. So it seems that writing letter is an expensive and inefficicent way to bring(deliver) the message. However, the writing skills still play a more important role in our daily life, for speaking can not(cannot) deals with all the things in life.留学,考试,TOEFL,GRE,GMAT,IELTS,SAT,VISA,文书,签证,论坛,出国,申请,美国,英国,欧洲,加拿大,USA0h­`7Sj
Admittedly, writing might bringsunexceptable(?) results which can not be obtained by merely using his or her mouth. For instant, it is sending a poem that is a wiser method to express your love than cost(cast) a simple sentence------- “I LOVE YOU !”. It is indisputable that romantic way is more easily to touch the hearts of girls. Writing skills not only help you produce a poem, but also create an elegant skillful one which suggests that you are a well-educated youth man rather than a surface speaker.(最后一句话又带出其他意思，应该再深入一下)
Although the sagas and legends can tell us something that happen thousands years ago by handed down from one generation of storytellers to another, paper-based record is a better way to preserve our history because it can present us a more reliable picture of long ago. So it is the history books that make the researches of anthropologists and archaeologists who wonder where the modern world came from easier. In the(/) terms of the sail, the writing skills coule(?) help the sailors find the right dirction as well as log things happened on the sea which act as a reference of the other sailors.(第二个例子没有看明白)


Fortunately, the writing skills make it is possible that literatuer from which Man gain the sense of beauty is available. When the writer reaches an unutterable glimpse, it is unwise to try to utter it, they just need an imagery which is the only way to explain the meaning.(没看懂).
LZ应该试着用简单句和简单词来表达明确的意思，另外，拼写错误写稍显的多了，结尾段也未写。