COMEON作文小组------needyou 10月7日作业

needyouUID: 2251649

I agree with the statement that Movies and televisions have more positive or negative effects on young people’s behaviors, because nowadays, movies and television is the first choice that young people know and connect with the world.

We are easier than ever before get information from the world from the mass Media. For example. There is a report from some great universities said that Young people living in The Asia and The Africa knows America and America’s life from the movies. Because it’s easier and more vivid. Young people like copy and have good ability at learning, And the effect will show on their behaviors, all the report shows that so many violence cause by violate movies around the world. Young people sometimes watch the movies fully filled with violate and think that way will be “cool”. But it’s wrong.

But there are good effect from the video media. Such as sports and some public service, we always watch the Chinese sport star Yao Ming says “protect the world, protect our home.”  In the discovery channel. We can see some NGO need volunteers in some project. And see the counselor help the homeless child. the world of Full love.

But I think that in some ways, we need traditional media like books and wireless radio. Something you can read but you can not watch it, it’s a different feeling, and may good for young man’s behaviors.

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

I agree with the statement that Movies and televisions have more positive or negative effects on young people’s behaviors/审题不仔细啊，是要你选一个观点, because nowadays, movies and television is the first choice that young people know and connect with the world.

We are easier than ever before /to get information from the world from the mass Media. For example. There is a report from some great universities said that Young people living in The Asia and The/多余？不太确定 Africa knows America and America’s life from the movies. Because it’s easier and more vivid. /However ,on the other hand Young people like copy and have good ability at learning/这句应当是要表达年轻人是非标准比较模糊吧？, And the effect will show on their behaviors, all the report shows that so many violence cause by violate movies around the world. Young people sometimes watch the movies fully filled with violate and think/consider that way will be “cool”. But it’s wrong/which is obviously aberrant to general principles.

But there are good effect from the video media. Such as sports and some public service, we always watch the Chinese sport star Yao Ming says “protect the world, protect our home.”  In the discovery channel. We can see some NGO need volunteers in some project. And see the counselor help the homeless child. the world of Full love.

But I think that in some ways, we need traditional media like books and wireless radio. Something you can read but you can not watch it, it’s a different feeling, and may good for young man’s behaviors.

逻辑有点乱，可能是一开始没审题清楚造成的。句式、用词方面有提升空间，建议先研究下OG中例文