COMEON小组-needyou10月19日作业

needyouUID: 2251649

10月19日
150) Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Technology has made the world a better place to live. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion
Technology has improved our daily life, by using the facilitate tools which scientist invented these days, I strongly agree with that technology provide us a better living condition, faster communication and locomotive.

One example, the computer, nowadays without computer and the Internet, it’s hard to do so many things, such as in college life, there are so many universities need students learn more and more lessons within computer, for it’s facilitate and easily use. Some guys want to do research and can easily search information in Internet library, so the technology, such as computer and internet, has faster our daily life, and easier to get information.

Another thing I want to say, about the transportation. Car, jet plane, make the world smaller than ever, Around the World in 80 days is easy for every common people, nowadays we can traveler by the jet plane from BeiJing to los angles in just few hours, and we can arrived on moon by the space shuttle, china has recently lunch a moon satellite and astronaut walking in the space, the china myth comes true now. all the results by the technology.

About the medium, television and movie, and Internet are so vivid now and entertain our daily life. Television become the prime entertainment, and by the technology, such as the greatest creations in 20th century. Refrigerator, make the food can be reserve for a long time, camera, save the flash. Nuclear power, seems like a kind of clearing energy. And microwave oven can make the food always hot, and hot food are healthy for human’s body. And the effect are thanks to the revolution of technology, obviously, technology made our daily life better.

In one world, I strongly agree with the statement that technology made the world better place to live. But in other hand, technology is a double blade sword, just like the nuclear power, how about the nuclear weapon? Thousands of people’s lives efface in a flash, nightmare in human’s history, and albert einstein regretted about the evil power. But, all I want to say, I agree that technology made the world a better place to live.

最近事情比较忙，文章很乱，大家见谅…

希望reviser 痛批

[ 本帖最后由 needyou 于 2008-10-19 23:29 编辑 ]

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

字好小啊……
先mark
明天改

jackallen0714UID: 2510951

Our daily life has been improved by facilitate tools which scientist invented these days./没必要拆成两句，而且原来主谓搭配有问题 I strongly agree with/+ the fact或者直接去掉with that technology provide us a better living condition, faster communication and locomotive/?词汇貌似不恰当.

One example, the computer,/太口语化了，多余。 Nowadays without computer and the Internet, it’s hard to do so many things, such as/后面接的是一个长句子，用such as不好，建议去掉in college life, there are so many universities need students learn more and more lessons within computer, for it’s facilitate/词性不对 and easily use. Some guys want to do research/People doing research can easily search information in Internet library, so the technology, such as computer and internet, has faster/accelerate our daily life, and easier to get information/主谓要搭配好！.

Another thing I want to say is about the transportation. Car, jet plane, make the world smaller than ever, Around the World in 80 days is easy for every common people, nowadays we can traveler by the jet plane from BeiJing to los angles in just few hours, and we can arrived on the moon by the space shuttle, china has recently lunch a moon satellite and astronaut walking in the space, the china myth comes true now. all the results by the technology/没谓语.

About/多余 the medium, television and movie, and Internet are so vivid now to entertain our daily life. Television has  became the prime entertainment./标点也很重要，不要乱加 and by the technology, such as 去掉 the greatest creations in 20th century Refrigerator, make the food can be reserved for a long time, camera, save the flash 这算是完整的句子吗？. Nuclear power, seems like a kind of clearing energy. And microwave oven can make the food always hot, and hot food are healthy for human’s body. All the effects are credit to the revolution of technology.Therefore 注意逻辑, technology obviously made our daily life better.

In one world, I strongly agree with the statement that technology made the world better place to live. But in other hand, technology is a double blade sword, just like the nuclear power, how about你觉得...怎么样,用在这不合适，这里应该是一个解释性的句子，比如：科技是双刃剑，就像核能一方面可以作为能源造福于人，另一方面也可以作为武器来伤害人。你的原句是：另一方面，科技是双刃剑，比如核能，你觉得核武器怎么样？显然并未对科技是双刃剑做出任何有意义的解释 the nuclear weapon? Thousands of people’s lives efface in a flash, nightmare in human’s history, and albert einstein regretted about the evil power. But, all I want to say, I agree that technology made the world a better place to live.


还是主谓，搭配，逻辑等基本问题~
建议先背点优秀范文

needyouUID: 2251649

LS,我的第一段就是优秀范文摘抄的。